Talia, She Wrote

Dancing Brings Joy... Even in the Face of Sorrow

2010-07-15T10:58:00.002-06:00

A new Portal Manager and contributor to the Catholic Portal at Patheos, Elizabeth Scalia, writes over at the First Things site on the blog The Anchoress.

Recently she wrote a post about a Holocaust survivor who danced at Auschwitz and several other locations of horror in Europe with his daughter and three grandchildren.

There have been some broad criticisms of him as well as of his daughter, mainly accusing her of exploiting him and making claims that he "appears" to have dementia (which is false, according to his daughter). I don't feel that he is ill or sick for wanting to celebrate his life, especially in a place that knew so much death. I don't feel it is disrespectful, and frankly, I think it is wrong for us to judge this man. He lived through it, we have only read about it. If he chose to spit on the grounds or dance or cry or laugh... he has certainly earned the right to do so without the armchair critics attacking him or his family.

He seems like an incredible man who is intensely loved by his sweet family. I wish him a long and happy life, G-d willing. There are actually three videos in this series. I recommend them all. In the third, he goes back to the time in his mind and recalls the conversations they had with passing villagers while piled into the box cars, conveying them to their death.

Here are the videos:
Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

I would like to thank the Academy...

2010-07-13T14:06:00.001-06:00

Not really...

But I do want to thank my friend Matthue Roth for his kind words! He blogged here and here about his article on The Future of Judaism at Patheos.

And in the process... said this about me:

A few weeks ago, Talia Davis wrote to a bunch of Jewish techy and thinky folks and asked us what we thought about the future of Judaism. Talia is the force of nature behind the religion blog Patheos.com’s Jewish site, and when she chops down a tree, we hear it.

Aww! :) I feel special now. Thanks Matthue!

See:

Is this the future Israeli Jewish women are doomed to live?

2010-07-12T12:02:00.003-06:00

For a long time Women of the Wall has been a flash point in Israel and it has finally bubbled up and almost over.

Anat Hoffman, leader of the group Women of the Wall, was just arrested for carrying a Torah near the Kotel, the Western Wall.

These women have been beaten for having strap marks on their arm from Tefillin. Not even people witnessing them wearing it, just the leftover marks.
They have been abused verbally, physically, and by the police for minding their own business on their own side of the mechitza, the ritual divider between men and women. And for what? Because a small group of people believe their INTERPRETATION if the text is better than others? Because they believe women should not be allowed the joy of reading Torah at the Wall? Unfair.

Now, I straddle an interesting line. My Judaism runs Orthodox but my sensibilities run liberal. In the past I have challenged this male hierarchy in both America and Israel. I touched on that a little in my blog about my father. I wanted to dress as a boy to get on the men's side to daven. Not to do anything nefarious but because they make it seem like there is something better and more spiritual on the other side. The men attempt to make us feel dirty and wrong. Like there was some inherent sin or mistake we have made as a woman. But I have news for you, people, we aren't the Catholics. We don't believe in original sin. There isn't something wrong with me because I am a woman.

Lest you forget, it was the MEN of Israel that G-d was angry with for building the Golden Calf, not the women. We refused. Our gift? The moon festivals. Frankly, it boils down to me being sick and tired of women having restrictions put on us because men can't control themselves and are piggish. I am not a raging feminist. I love my long skirts and I embrace the idea that I will cover my hair when I get married. I adore the woman's side of most shuls (unless we are given a tiny postage stamp with which to conduct our service while watching the children you men don't have a lick of patience for. I love the female bonding time with my fellow Jewish women (both spiritually and just as friends over the mundane).

I am getting sick and tired of women being punished because men are too weak to learn how to control themselves. And people are right, actions like this make the Ultra-Orthodox (and in this sense, I am using it as a pejorative) look like they took a lesson from the Taliban.

Maybe this is spilling over today because I am the midst of planning an extended trip to study in Israel and I know this will confront me everyday. Maybe because I just read this article by Naomi Ragen in Moment Magazine about how men feel empowered to physically assault GRANDMOTHERS on the bus to get their way.

Is this how we are raising our children? Is this the future of Judaism? Will it look like Iranian Islam? Will women be forced to have a male family member escort them? Will we be told to wear a burka? I don't like this image of the future of Judaism and I don't see that as being sustainable. While I respect most forms of ultra-orthodoxy for their commitment to Judaism and their connection to the past, and while I certainly don't want to see that disappear, it disturbs me to see them come into MY world and tell ME what I can and cannot do. Why is the minority forcing their will on the majority and why aren't we saying anything about it?

I am an ardent Israel supporter. That doesn't mean I agree with everything. Israel is having growing pains. Our baby is now a teenager and we have to readjust the systems to accommodate this. But Judaism is not a teenager. Judaism is older and should know better.

There is a lot to figure out here. A lot of thought and strategic planning that must go into our future. I really hope we take the time.

For more articles on the future of Judaism, visit The Future of Judaism from Patheos
Originally posted at the Modern Midrash blog on the Jewish Portal of Patheos

Would a stone by any other name, mean the same thing?

2010-07-09T15:11:00.002-06:00

I was struck (no, not literally) by an image I recently came across on Flickr. It was of Palestinian men collecting rocks... well these were rocks on steroids, huge chunks of concrete, to hurl at Israeli soldiers and settlers who might wander down their streets.

Photo by Rusty Stewart via Flickr
It occurred to me when I saw this picture that we use rocks for very different purposes. These Palestinians use rocks to hurt and maim. Even in the broader Islamic culture, rocks are used to inflict pain and death. This punishment is usually used against women with little recourse in their society. I know that within Judaism there were some punishments that called for stoning, however, there has been no historically verified accounts of it every happening.

However, stones have a very important place in modern Judaism. We put them on the graves of our loved ones. It represents permanence, it shows a presence was there. We don't put flowers, which die. We leave a permanent marker of our visit.

I don't know what parallels or differences I draw from our very different usage of this same, simple item. I just found the dichotomy fascinating.

To cause death? To honor death?

This blog first appeared on the Modern Midrash blog of the Jewish Portal at Patheos

Comparisons to Hitler

2010-07-08T14:59:00.000-06:00

One of the Patheos guys has been writing a series on the Tea Party and different implications of it. (To read his great, albeit right leaning, perspectives on the Tea Party click here.)

In this last article, I was linked to some pictures of when Bush was in power. Now I am NOT a Bush fan and I did vote for Obama... It doesn't mean that I think Obama is the messiah or anything but I realized a couple of things looking at these pictures.

1. It doesn't matter what side of the aisle you are on... when your guy isn't in power and you don't like it, you get hateful (and that you is the broader "you).

2. It doesn't matter if it is 2003 or 2010... they are still after the Jews. I don't know why we have this target tattooed on our foreheads. I don't know why people who like to demonstrate hate Israel and the Jews (or why they can't learn to spell... is IsrAEl not IsrEAl) but there it is.

Recently, I did an interview with Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi about the future of Judaism. Reb Bahir posed the question to him, currently Jews make up a very small portion of the population. Do you think we will grow or shrink? Reb Zalman said, "How big is your gall bladder? But you have to have it, right? What about the pituitary gland?"

Point taken. We are all vital parts to the society and trying to kill the Jews just because we are Jewish isn't right. Period.

The Bonds of Sisterhood

2010-07-02T12:48:00.002-06:00

I don't know if I can say that I was never a joiner... really I felt like I was always on the outskirts of the groups I was in... Cheerleading, Drama Club, Youth Group... but I was always looking for some broader connection. I think a lot of this came from my family. When I was very little we lived with my grandparents but as I got older, my dad found work away from the Northeast and we were our own unit. My aunts and uncles didn't visit and my mom's family was just significantly older. My best friends were my closest family, my parents and brother. But I always wanted sisters and I wanted to be a part of something bigger than me.

I just returned from the 74th biennial Gamma Phi Beta convention. There were 850 women present who were MY sisters. I didn't meet all of them but if I ended up by the pool, in an elevator, or on a bus to Harry Potter world with one (or 10) of them, we always had something in common to talk about. Not only am I a part of something bigger than my small unit, I am a leader in that bigger picture. I take pride in the women who I call MY girls. They have adopted me as a big sister, mom, mentor, and annoying adult who interferes sometimes. And I am so thankful for those women. (GO BETA RHO!) :)

I find myself still searching because I am looking for that bigger picture with my faith as well but the connection I find within Gamma Phi Beta is a special one. No matter where I go in the world, there is a good chance that one of my 170,000 sisters is probably there and took a picture with any crescent moon present!

I joined Gamma Phi Beta at Jacksonville University to connect to something bigger than myself, bigger than the theatre department. It wasn't always easy (being a collegian never is) but it has paid off in spades. Recently, I met my fourth little legacy/faux niece and we are waiting on number five any day! I have a group of women I graduated with whom I call my dearest sisters and who will serve as my children's aunties, as I never had any blood sisters. I have cried on their shoulders, attended their weddings, held their babies, and inducted their husbands into our boy club. I met women from all over the US and Canada that shared my love of pink, crescents, and carnations last weekend, many of whom I will stay in touch with for the next two years until I see them again at our 2012 convention in DENVER. Which, by the way, will be our 75th.

I honestly don't know what Frances E. Haven, Mary A. Bingham, E. Adeline Curtis, or Helen M. Dodge were thinking when, in 1874 they decided not to be Alpha Phi's and create Gamma Phi Beta. We can guess and wonder and I am sure they could never have envisioned what GPhi looks like today but I am SO thankful for our founders.

Dear Pop. A Letter From My Father to His.

2010-07-01T10:54:00.001-06:00

I asked my father, Rebahir Davis, to write a piece about how his father inspired his Judaism for Patheos. His response was overwhelming to me as it brought back a flood of memories of my grandfather. However, it also gives a beautiful insight into the evolution of Judaism.

Please take a minute to read it here - http://bit.ly/d6JzYK - comment on the article, share on Facebook or Twitter, etc. Thanks!

My Tatti Taught Me A Little Shuckel...

2010-06-18T11:55:00.002-06:00

Okay, I admit it... I don't have the best memory in the world but there are a few things from my childhood that stick out clearly. I have mentioned some of them before, here in this blog, but with Father's Day rapidly approaching, I have asked my team to write about their father's and how they shaped their Jewish life. And so, I thought I would talk about the memories from my childhood of my dad.

My dad and me, 1983ish... these were called "Tali-Ups"

The men in my life have always figured prominently. Not sure why. Maybe because I was the first grandchild, a little girl, and they all felt protective of me. But either way... I was always close with the men... my grandfathers and my father. I think another thing that factors in is that my men were also always my rabbis. From birth I was dressed up and my picture taken for the newspaper... in my grandfather's ark, lighting candles with my father, you know what I mean.

But here is the memory I was alluding to earlier. My father, though he was an ordained Reform rabbi, was a bit more observant than typical. He liked to have Saturday morning services. He would always try to get a minyan together but it didn't often happen. I remember one Saturday morning, going to shul with my dad. There were a handful of men there and we were davvening the shachrit service. I was half-focused and maybe all of 9 at the time. I would play with my dad's tzitzit, crawl behind the behemoths that stood on the bimah... and when we got to a part I knew, I would daven. Well all the men were rocking back and forth and so I did too... thus began my fascination with and love of the shuckel. Shuckling is a "ritual" swaying front to back and side to side. In fact, I find myself doing it right now as I write this. Anyway, I had the shuckel down pat! I overheard one man say to my dad, "Well she's got the moves right, now she needs to learn the words."

Fast forward a few years to four months before my bat mitzvah. I am 12 years old and we are on an El Al flight for our first trip to Israel as a family. I was a fairly intense kid and felt my Judaism strongly. (This is shortly before I began wearing a kippah everyday as well as a talit katan - the tallis undergarment that Orthodox men wear.) I had all sorts of plans for Israel, including but not limited to dressing as a boy and sneaking onto the men's side of the Kotel, the Western Wall. (I assure you, I have figured out an appropriate way to express my enthusiasm for Judaism... 18 years later.) The flights to Israel are very long (around 13 hours) and inevitably, it comes time to davven either shachrit (morning), mincha (afternoon), or maariv (evening) services. When the time came, Orthodox men went around asking men to join them in the back of the plane for a minyan. I told my father that I wanted to davven too. He told me to grab my siddur (prayer book) and come along. Out of a level of respect, I didn't jam myself into the back where all the men where (many sects of Orthodox Judaism forbid men and women from praying together or touching) but I stood alongside my father while we davvened. I was not spared the dirty looks though and one man said to my father, "she isn't allowed to do this." To which my dear, sweet abba (father in Hebrew) replied, "If you were truly focused on your prayers, you wouldn't even notice she was here." Chastised, he harumphed and went back to davvening.

That is how my relationship has always been with my tatti (yiddish for father). He has always been my staunchest ally and defender. But not blindly. He has always challenged me to think for myself and perhaps rethink some things. He never expected, commanded, or demanded much from me in so many words. He was always gentle and kind and treated me like an adult. He explained things to me with more patience than I currently explain technology to him (sorry, tatti) and he showed me by example how dear Judaism was to him.

One thing that I can never thank my parent's enough for was the way the kept my brother and I engaged in Judaism. I never recall being forced to be Jewish, rather they showed us the beauty of our faith in every sector (from Orthodox to Renewal) and educated us in other faiths (I have been to dozens of churches and mosques). During the Passover seder, when the Four Children ask their questions, I was always struck with the answer, "It was because of what G-d did for me in the land of Egypt." That was how my parents approached Judaism. This is what is important to ME, how does it feel to YOU.

I remember one defining moment as a teen. My aunt and uncle were badgering me, much to my dismay. At one point they made the statement, well of course you will marry a Jew. And just to spite them (and without much thought) I said, well I don't know. Maybe I won't.
They immediately ran to my parents and told them what I had said. My dear father came to me and we had a talk. He expressed how important all the holidays were to him and how much he enjoyed them as a family. He expressed that he hoped I one day had a family and that we would all share in these traditions. And he reminded me that at that point in his career, he didn't perform interfaith weddings and could not do my ceremony if that was my choice (he has since altered this policy, having nothing to do with me). I was heartbroken. How could my thoughtless words have hurt my father so much? How could I have said these things that I wasn't sure I meant? There were repercussions that I hadn't thought of.

I am thankful for my lineage. I am thankful for my grandfathers, on both sides, who both held their families together in difficult times and gave me my parents. And on this father's day, I am thankful for my Tatti/TattiSan/Abba/AbbaSama/Dad/Daddy/Father.

My dad and me. 2010.

Dad - Thanks for passing on your love of all things odd to me. Thanks for tolerating my teenage inability to listen. Thanks for trying over and over to teach me Hebrew. Thanks for being my favorite rabbi. Thanks for always looking at all sides of an issue and helping me do the same. Thanks for answering the phone at 3am when I was calling collect from a public phone booth on the top of Mt. Masada in Israel.

And thanks for imbuing in me a love of Judaism, my people, my homeland (Israel), and pride. Love you, Ta. Love, Twe.

Originally posted at Patheos' Modern Midrash blog.

Gimmel Tammuz - Lubavitcher Lore and Holy Days

2010-06-15T09:42:00.001-06:00

Today marks an auspicious day on the Chabad Lubavitcher's calendar. Today is Gimmel Tammuz (the third day of the month of Tammuz).

On this day in 5754 or 1994 in Gregorian years, the Lubavitcher Rebbe passed away. This dealt a hard blow to the community. He and his wife were childless and he did not appoint a successor. This divided the community, some believing that he was the Moshiach (messiah) and some not believing in that. It is a topic that still divides Crown Heights today.

A newly published biography of the Rebbe's life has caused a stir in the Crown Heights community as well. The New York Times touches on that today, with a nod to the holiness of the day within Chabad.

But beyond the debate, this day is very special to those who affiliate Chabad or are friends of Chabad. And it cannot be denied that The Rebbe sent thousands of people all over the world to be "a light unto the nations" and to give all Jews everywhere a place to eat Kosher food and pray and find their Judaism. Because of this, thousands of people will descend on Queens today to pray at the grave of The Rebbe and his father-in-law, the Previous Rebbe. Don't believe me? It's already started! Here are some wounded Israeli soldiers who were invited to come. And here are the people trying to get a head start on the lines.

From the last time I was at The Ohel - the Rebbe's grave:

From Chabad.org, they tell us that there is a lot more that has happened on this date in Jewish history:

• Joshua Stops the Sun (1273 BCE)
On the third of Tammuz of the year 2488 from creation (1273 BCE), Joshua was leading the Jewish people in one of the battles to conquer the Land of Israel. Victory was imminent, but darkness was about to fall. "Sun," proclaimed Joshua, "be still at Giv'on; moon, at the Ayalon valley" (Joshua 10:12). The heavenly bodies acquiesced, halting their progress through the sky until Israel's armies brought the battle to its successful conclusion. Three Natural Miracles The Book of Joshua

• Lubavitch Fire (1851)
A great fire destroyed much of the town of Lubavitch, including the home of the third Chabad Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem Mendel of Lubavitch (the "Tzemach Tzeddek", 1789-1826) and many invaluable manuscripts of Chassidic teaching.

• R. Yosef Yitzchak Released from Prison (1927)
The sixth Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Yosef Yitzchak Schneersohn (1880-1950), who was arrested on Sivan 15 of 1927 by agents of the GPU (soviet secret police) and the Yevsektzia ("Jewish section" of the Communist Party) for his work to preserve and disseminate Jewish learning and observance throughout the Soviet Empire. Held in the notorious Spalerno prison in Leningrad, he was repeatedly interrogated and beaten. Initially sentenced to death, international pressure compelled the Soviet regime to first commute the sentence to ten years hard labor in Siberia, and then to a three-year term of exile in Kostrama, a town in the interior of Russia.

On the 3rd of Tammuz, 18 days after his arrest, he was released from prison and allowed six hours at home before reporting to the Leningrad train station to embark on his exile. Many gathered at the station to see him off. Though he knew that there were GPU agents present, he spoke to the assembled crowd, encouraging all to persist in the very activities for which he had been arrested. "This," he proclaimed "all the nations of the world must know: Only our bodies were sent into exile and subjugated to alien rule; our souls were not given over into captivity and foreign rule. We must proclaim openly and before all that any matter affecting the Jewish religion, Torah, and its mitzvot and customs is not subject to the coercion of others. No one can impose his belief upon us, nor coerce us to conduct ourselves contrary to our beliefs!"

(On the 12th of Tammuz, after serving only nine days of his three year term, Rabbi Yosef Yitzchak was informed that he was free to return home. Shortly thereafter, he was allowed to leave the Soviet Union and resettled in Riga, Latvia.) Days of Light (the Rebbe's prison diary)

They say that the yahrtzeit (anniversary of passing) of a tzaddik (a righteous person) is a particularly impact-full time for G-d to hear our prayers. And especially if you are praying at their grave site. Chabad is giving people a chance to send them their prayers to be placed at The Rebbe's grave. But also this is a good time to reevaluate and take on a mitzvah like lighting the shabbis candles or going to synagogue on Saturday morning.

I will leave you with my favorite quote from The Rebbe...

"You have to keep moving forward. As long as you’re holding on to where you were yesterday, you’re standing still." -The Rebbe

Keep moving forward not just in life but in Judaism too. How did you Jew today?

Originally posted at Patheos' Jewish Portal

Capstone - Now I Need YOUR Help!

2010-06-09T11:37:00.001-06:00

Hello! So I am in the data collection phase of this capstone and I need everyone's help.

I told my advisors that I have pretty good digital reach and a nice online network, now I have to prove it. I need at least 100 responses to this survey or my data isn't really valid.

PLEASE take this survey and have your friends do it as well. It isn't very long or intrusive, I promise!!! Please take it asaps!

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s/TaliasCapstone

Thanks!

How do you find the words when they are spit back in your face?

2010-06-02T15:08:00.002-06:00

I am emotionally exhausted. Since the boats with "peace activists" heading to Gaza was intercepted I have fought and fought this issue round and round with my friends and acquaintances. Emotionally, I am drained. My head hurts. I can't think of the permutations any more. I want to just say that this is how it is, no more conversation.

But nothing is ever so simple or easy.

Here are some basic facts of the issue. I promise you, honestly, I am being as unbiased as possible.

The flotilla was asked to dock in Ashdod so Israel could ensure there were no weapons being brought into Gaza.
The boats ignored this request.
There were 6 boats. Israeli commandos boarded all 6. 5 were peaceful and headed to port. ONE got violent, beating Israel soldiers.

Now some say that the many of the products on board were expired and just a front for weapons. Some say it was purely a peace mission. Could it possibly be both?

Some say the Israelis came on board fighting. Some say (including some video evidence) that they came on board with paintball guns to subdue, not fight and were attacked. Could it possibly be both?

Beyond anything, there are many women and children and elderly in this strip of land the Israelis gave to this group of refugees. And they need support. Hamas does not offer adequate infrastructure so while they fire on Israel, they ask for/demand what they need. Israel brings in aid every day. Amounting to approx 15k tons a week. But they are reticent to allow Arab nations to provide supplies directly because of the direct assaults on Israel and callous suicide bombings.

A friend brought something up to me that I thought was very interesting. The constant conversation around Israel v. Palestine seems to be - there were 1,000 Palestinians killed but only 30 Israelis. How can we take these numbers at face value? The Israeli army attempts to limit civilian casualties but Hamas uses private homes to launch rockets. Israelis have been under almost constant attack since 1947. They have bomb safe rooms and gas masks for every adult and child. There are building codes in Israel. The people living in Gaza do not have the same. Should Israel refrain from responding when Gaza launches missiles into the heart of their cities because their people have more interest in preserving their lives?

This is not always the case, as with any war there are tragedies and mistakes on all sides. But we cannot blindly blame Israel based on numbers without facts.

There are a few articles that I have found very interesting and I recommend reading. I think we must all educate ourselves on both sides. We have to understand all plights before we can make a statement. My family has close friends, Arab Israelis who live in East Jerusalem. We have been close with them since the early 70's. Our traditions are different but we still find a friendship through it all.

To read:
Palestine Betrayed
The Peace Flotilla
Flotilla Facts - a pro-Israel opinion

Update 6.3.10: Despite having horrific dreams last night where in Israel just let Hamas do it's thing and Israel was bombed out of existence, I am still reading the news. This Op-Ed in the NYTimes is very well done - A Botched Raid, A Vital Embargo.

Lacking Something...

2010-05-27T15:04:00.003-06:00

I have been a very bad blogger.

Beyond being busy with Patheos work and my personal thesis for my Masters, there have been a couple other things going on. This year the Omer was particularly poignant. The Omer is a time when you should be reflecting on your life and working on personal growth but amidst that, I was asked to pray the section Resh of the 119 Psalm. Long story short, when someone is sick you read Psalm 119 and since it is so long, you read the letters that correspond to their Hebrew name. Resh goes like this -


קנג רְאֵה-עָנְיִי וְחַלְּצֵנִי: כִּי-תוֹרָתְךָ, לֹא שָׁכָחְתִּי.	153 RESH. O see mine affliction, and rescue me; for I do not forget Your law.
קנד רִיבָה רִיבִי, וּגְאָלֵנִי; לְאִמְרָתְךָ חַיֵּנִי.	154 Plead Thou my cause, and redeem me; quicken me according to Your word.
קנה רָחוֹק מֵרְשָׁעִים יְשׁוּעָה: כִּי חֻקֶּיךָ, לֹא דָרָשׁוּ.	155 Salvation is far from the wicked; for they seek not Your statutes.
קנו רַחֲמֶיךָ רַבִּים יְהוָה; כְּמִשְׁפָּטֶיךָ חַיֵּנִי.	156 Great are Your compassions, O LORD; quicken me as is Your will.
קנז רַבִּים, רֹדְפַי וְצָרָי; מֵעֵדְו‍ֹתֶיךָ, לֹא נָטִיתִי.	157 Many are my persecutors and mine adversaries; yet have I not turned aside from You.
קנח רָאִיתִי בֹגְדִים, וָאֶתְקוֹטָטָה-- אֲשֶׁר אִמְרָתְךָ, לֹא שָׁמָרוּ.	158 I beheld them that were faithless, and strove with them; because they observed not Your word.
קנט רְאֵה, כִּי-פִקּוּדֶיךָ אָהָבְתִּי; יְהוָה, כְּחַסְדְּךָ חַיֵּנִי.	159 O see how I love Your precepts; quicken me, O LORD, according to Your loving-kindness.
קס רֹאשׁ-דְּבָרְךָ אֱמֶת; וּלְעוֹלָם, כָּל-מִשְׁפַּט צִדְקֶךָ.	160 The beginning of Your word is truth; and all Your righteous ordinance endure for ever.

So every night for 40 days, during my 49 day Omer, I prayed this psalm with a woman named Abbie in my mind. I don't know Abbie but her case has been well publicized of late. After undergoing fertility treatments to finally have children, the hospital screwed up and nicked her. She lost so much blood and is now a "vegetable." Her "husband" divorced her and took her triplets and will not allow her to see them.

So I am davvening about myself and I am davvening about Abbie... and I realized any of us could be Abbie. It is so silly to say and I know everyone says it when something like this happens but we have to remember that every day is special. Every time I hug my dearest friend's 5 little girls, every time my brother and I go to the theatre, every time my dad calls me just because he is thinking about me. Those moments are precious.

I have many, many, many friends who are pregnant right now, a few getting married and someone asked me, "Isn't it hard to be single and see your friend's finding happiness in relationships?" The thought hadn't occurred to me. Whether it is a friend I saw yesterday or I haven't seen for 10 years, I am genuinely thrilled for them and I love living it with them on Facebook or their blogs.

Life is too short and those moments too precious to spend all your time being angry, sad, disappointed, or mad. So I had my Omer hibernation... and I will have my thesis hibernation for a while this summer (7 weeks to research and write... hair pulling begins... now!) but I will try to remember to enjoy something every day.

Let me share with you what I am enjoying this week. Rashi's Daughters. If you haven't read this series, I highly recommend it. I am so enjoying learning Talmud while I read it, it has even changed the way I am approaching some of my education. It is a series to savor.

I hope you find your enjoyment this week.

P.S. Here's my everyday enjoyment! My beautiful faux nieces.

Who couldn't smile with these beauties in their life!

Pick Your Testament, It's A Fact.

2010-05-11T15:23:00.000-06:00

I was initially struck by the URL. RabbiDov.com/HateIsraelWeek... HATE ISRAEL WEEK?

What is the world is Hate Israel Week? As I read, the good Rabbi made some insightful points, many similar to my father's arguments.
As it turns out, at UCI around May 5th of every year, the Muslim Student Union hosts Hate Israel Week.

Wow.

I know it is kinda the popular thing right now... talking about Israel as the occupiers and vilifying Israelis. But the reality is that it was not so long ago that Israel was hailed as an incredible country and garnered support from most of the world.

What I find so remarkable is the factual history that is always ignored. The fact that Israel is less than one percent of the region. That there are (and I quote from the article) "There are some 23 independent Arab Muslim countries. There is only one Jewish country. There are two countries for people of Korean descent. Two countries for people of Chinese descent. A proud nation for people of Japanese descent. Even Mongolians have two countries: Inner and Outer." But Jews are not afforded that right? Even though we were in Israel before Islam was a twinkle in Muhammad's eye?

Despite the fact that we pray towards Jerusalem but all other conquerors refrained from seeing the importance of Jerusalem before this.

Despite the fact that Israel really does afford citizens of Israel (Jewish, Christian or Muslim) the same rights and even allows the people who sneak across the border to kill Israelis to have access to Israeli public services (medical, etc). But sometimes that border closes because when they let people in, those people come in to only kill innocent civilians. Or sneak across and capture soldiers. If Canadians were launching rockets into Milwaukee, wouldn't we close some borders too?

And despite the fact that the Palestinian refugee problem was caused by the Muslim states refusal to absorb their own people, as is the typical response when faced with the refugees of war...

Israel is vilified. It bothers me when people don't learn both sides of the history. I am fully sympathetic to the want and need of the Palestinians. I feel the pain of living under these horrible leaders, of thinking they don't have options, of wanting space of their own. But until bombs stop falling and suicide bombers stop being recruited and the Palestinian leadership stops saying "All or nothing, run the Jews into the sea." There can't be peace.

One of the most shocking things I have ever seen, with my own eyes, mind you, is a school book from Gaza and the West Bank... the math problem said, "If you have 5 Jews and you kill 3 of them, how many are left to kill?" Or the Sesame Street like TV show where the little girls and boys talk about becoming martyrs. That is not right.

Please, read this - A Few Thoughts to Ponder on the Occasion of the Muslim Students Union Annual "Hate Israel Week" at UCI

Social Media Experterie...

2010-05-11T11:33:00.000-06:00

Yeah, I know that isn't a word. :)

I have been working on my Capstone proposal for the culmination of my Master's degree lately. It is do super soon... and I am just about to wrap up the proposal process. (Now I just have to cut 1000 words... yeah, I'm wordy, we know that right?)

I came across this article on Twitter. I was initially attracted to it because I am a HUGE Sarah Evans fan (I started following her years ago and was very impressed by her ideas). But the other really interesting thing about this article was that I was writing about this very topic.

Too many people calling themselves Social Media _____ (insert platitude here) - guru? expert? ideologue? evangelist?

Fact of the matter is... we are all still trying to figure out the best ways to use social media and inbound marketing. You can have it all figured out and then Myspace becomes "dorky" and Facebook is the new hot thing. Social media and inbound marketing is fluid and ever changing. None of us can really call ourselves experts yet... especially people who were tapped to be the social media point person BECAUSE they have a Facebook profile. Now, nothing against those people (because I was one of them and innovated SM for my organization because I was the only one familiar with it) but it take more than that to understand SM and how to use it.

In completing my Masters in PR & Marketing, one thing that surprised me was job definitions of PR people... one book said 50% of our job is research. There is an impression that you aren't working if you aren't typing press releases or making phone calls, the reality is that we must spend time on the internet and on these tools to innovate.

Here is the article that I was talking about - Is your social media expert really an expert?

I love their bullets... what do you think? My SM professor liked #24 particularly...

The Space In-between...

2010-05-07T12:35:00.001-06:00

I have a blog to write... it's about intermarriage and the effect on kids and I interviewed a friend for it but really what's on my mind right now is this...

I live in a space in-between too many worlds.

Not good enough or well bred enough for this one.

Unsatisfied with that one.

Randomly falling into this or that.

UGH!

Here's the problem, in a nutshell...

I didn't grow up an Orthodox Jew. I grew up in a family full of illustrious and talented Reform Jewish rabbis. Judaism was always my identity, my priority. But I never felt comfortable in the Reform movement. I mean, it didn't help that some of the adult leaders and rabbis were rude and mean and hurtful to me and my family for the simple reason of us being different. We never quite fit in. My dad wore a kippah and tzitzit all the time, we davvened on Saturday mornings, we kept Kosher and shabbis... not really the typical image of a reform Jew.

In fact, I remember quite clearly my Junior year of high school, at a large national convention where my father mentioned he would be davvening one morning and offered to teach the kids how to lay tefillin. Now, this is a basic ritual of Judaism and these kids had never encountered it. Before he could even start showing them how, a "big-shot" rabbi in the movement came rushing in and said, "We don't do that, we are reform Jews." Yeah, what does that even mean? I thought being reform meant you got to choose... I guess educated decisions are out and lemming-ness is in. I was sorely hurt by the reform movement. So much so that I realized that was not the place for me and I left, never to return.

I went on the hunt and found Chabad... a place where I felt I fit in. I studied and made friends, I davvened, I dressed along their guidelines and I finally came to a point where I was "a part of the crew." By this point in my life, it is time to think about getting married. Well, I don't fit in with the reformies (as I, and I alone call them... made that up, not a pejorative... just a nickname) but I don't have enough Chassidic yichus (pedigree or family background) to marry a Chabanik!

Well and then there is the horse of a different color which is my secular life... it revolves solidly around Judaism and how I practice it but I work in a secular office, I have non-religious friends, I don't live in Crown Heights, people! But marrying someone who is a secular Jew will be hard (i.e. kashrut and a Jewish home is so important to me and all the laws and mitzvot, learning and studying together... tahras mishpacha) and you can forget marrying a non-Jew. I am open minded and I know many people believe in interfaith marriages but I don't. At least not for Jews. There has been too many times in our history where people tried to destroy us and we survived... for what? To marry a Christian and have a Christmas tree? To force your children (if their mother isn't Jewish) to have to deal with conversion and think about the future generations because you couldn't be bothered? Or maybe you just didn't think it was important.

I don't agree with the way it used to be... women as commodities, selling them for the best or adjoining land. But in one sense that had it right. The marriage wasn't just about that second of passion or a physical attraction, it was about building lives for future generations... and that is why I feel it is so vital to marry a Jew and teach my sons and daughters the same thing.

Building on our heritage for future generations, thinking about more than ourselves, realizing that sometimes we want things we don't need. You want that thing you saw advertised on tv but really, you know you will have a brief love affair with it and then it will sit on the floor of your closet, unused, unloved, and unsold in a garage sale 10 years later. Just because something (or someone) looks cool, doesn't mean that it is the right fit. The easiest way out isn't always the easiest in the end.

I don't explain this often (enough?) to friends or acquaintances and frankly they are shocked when I tell them about this rock and hard place I am sitting between. They think I am silly for narrowing down my pool of available men but I know it is the right thing to do... no matter how hard it gets... no matter how many times I am turned down for being to this or not enough that.

My children will thank me one day.

National Day of (Christian only) Prayer?

2010-05-06T09:00:00.000-06:00

What if the National Day of Prayer meant we actually came together as a country, despite our differences and prayed together? What if we lived in a country where a kid like me wasn't bullied for trying to participate with the Christian kids in the National Day of Prayer... because I think jesus was a nice Jewish kid who was misunderstood?

So I there has been a lot of conversation about the National Day of Prayer and all that hoopla. Officially, today is the "National Day of Prayer." Initially, sounds cool, right? It's like National Badge Day where all the Panhellenic Sororities get to show off their membership to the world...

Actually, maybe it is more like badge day than I initially thought. The National Day of Prayer, it turns out is pretty exclusive. Now on one hand I was a proponent because I felt it was cool, get everyone from every religion to pray for peace and safety and health on the same day. Maybe we can all realize we are the same, no matter what language we use to speak to G-d (Allah or God or Hashem etc...)

Uhm. But that is not the case.

I thought the judge who decided it was unconstitutional was kinda right but hey, here's nice idea for everyone, get them praying to whatever. I've heard many Jews say it's not a day for us, their reasoning? We pray (or are supposed to) three times a day, one hundred prayers daily. Right we don't need to stop what we are doing to pray. But we can all come together, right?

Uhm. No. Guess not.

Maybe my idealistic brain was running away with my compassionate heart. Clearly, that is not what is happening here. The point is to exclude non-Christians. Just like that event in high school called "See You At The Pole." Remember that? One day a year they met at the flag pole to pray. Yeah, I made the mistake in my tiny, overly Christian and overly anti-Jewish town (where I went to high school) to try and join them for the praying at the pole. I was purposefully excluded from the circle and told I wasn't invited to participate... unless I accepted jesus. Cool. So pretty much National Day of Prayer, or at least as it is nationally organized, is just these kids grown up.

Their mission? (From their website) "The National Day of Prayer Task Force’s mission is to communicate with every individual the need for personal repentance and prayer, mobilizing the Christian community to intercede for America and its leadership in the seven centers of power: Government, Military, Media, Business, Education, Church and Family."

Vision and Values? "In accordance with Biblical truth, the National Day of Prayer Task Force seeks to:

Foster unity within the Christian Church

Protect America’s Constitutional Freedoms to gather, worship, pray and speak freely.

Publicize and preserve America’s Christian heritage

Encourage and emphasize prayer, regardless of current issues and positions

Respect all people, regardless of denomination or creed

Be wise stewards of God’s resources and provision

Glorify the Lord in word and deed"

Now, they have to have an official statement about their "Judeo-Christian" values and that anyone can organize their own thing but this is how they organize. Well interesting. So this is the leading lobby for the National Day of Prayer. No wonder other people's views are being ignored. It is only their voices that are being heard. Guess it can get pretty confusing when you say, on your website, that you are the "Official Site" of the 59th Annual Observance of the National Day of Prayer.

So I get it, we pray everyday but wouldn't it be cool if we had a national voice too? And wouldn't it be cool if kids like me were allowed to join the prayer circle? And wouldn't it be cool if kids like me weren't asked to leave the lunchtime bible study at their public high schools because they are "confusing" the other kids and making it hard for them to learn the "truth?" (Yeah, that really happened... I guess 14 was too young to have interfaith conversations...)

Ah well... guess in my dream world.

A Guide to the Jewish Year... and the Jewish people

2010-05-03T10:18:00.000-06:00

My friend posted this on Facebook and I thought... damn, that's true... well, sometimes! :)

A Guide to Jewish Holidays: Purim is for alcoholics.
Pesach is for obsessive compulsives.
Shavuot is for insomniacs.
Lag B'omer is for pyromaniacs unsatisfied with Hanukkah.
Tisha B'av is for depressives.
Rosh Hashana is for those obsessed over dying.
Yom Kippur is for anorexics.
Sukkot is for the homeless.
Simchat Torah is for those in the happy stages of bipolar…
And people wonder why Jews invented psychoanalysis.

Remember the Omer!

2010-04-30T17:00:00.001-06:00

I really love the Omer... okay, rather, I have a love hate relationship with counting the Omer. I love the spiritual lift I get, but I sometimes get annoyed at one more thing to do before sleep... hence why I need to count the Omer nightly.

I use a wonderful book that asks you questions and gives you great thoughts for each day that relates to the sepherot (like the chakras). Here is their online version for week 5 - Meaningful Life. The book is called “Counting the Omer – A Spiritual Guide” by Rabbi Simon Jacobson.

Check it out!

(Originally posted at the Jewish Portal at Patheos)

Organizing Nerd Alert!

2010-04-30T12:57:00.001-06:00

Okay, I must rant for a minute.

So my friend over at CasaCullen has gotten me all inspired to spruce up my wee home. I've enjoyed planning out many projects and (so far) executing a few.

One thing I always go round and round about is organizing my stuff... Shoes, sweaters, clothing, books, movies, etc.

And then I got an email from my heaven/hell... The Container Store.

I can spend hours there, picking out new storage ideas and then I finish, realize I will not spend $30 on a rack to organize my scarves and $25 on another lunch solution, put it away where I got it (because I worked in retail and that concept is seared in my brain) and walk quickly to the exit to prevent myself from coming up with another (costly) storage idea. I am fortunate to have a dear friend, Zeina, who has helped me see outside the (expensive) (but useful) (plastic) (storage) box. She always has great ideas on how to do things cheaper.

Anyway, back to the email. This email was aimed right at my weakest weakness... Shoes.

The headline was - SASSY Shoe Shoe Storage on SALE! Yeah. I knew I was in trouble from the minute I read it. I scanned the image and found the perfect solution for my shoes and in the milisecond it took me to click the image and get to the webpage, I said to myself (very fast) "Self, you KNOW its going to be like $8 per thingie and you KNOW how many shoes you have." Then I told myself not to be silly... it can't hurt to look.

Drop Front Shoe Boxes - regularly $6.99... on sale for $4.99... awesome. Cool. Give me... wait let me count... oh... roughly... 25 or so. WHAT?! Do we realize that comes out to $124.75 (I used a calculator, don't judge... I was a theatre major)!!! And why does this stuff have to be sold individually? What woman, in her right mind, only owns ONE pair of black heels (or brown, or silver, or red, or yellow... yes I said yellow)?

So yeah. I love them. They would be just perfect for my closet and mountain of shoes but I don't have $124.75 to throw around willy nilly on shoe solutions... So back to my Zeina I go... for an "on the budget" idea... and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Not kidding. She makes the best PB&J in the world. For reals.

Protesting with Prayer

2010-04-29T14:18:00.002-06:00

A certain so called "church" group was in Denver last weekend. I am not going to mention their name because I do not believe in giving them free publicity to fuel their hate. I was going to go to their protest and all the counter-protests and I was going to video tape it and take pictures for Patheos. And I was going to write about the experience and the hate these people spread. I was really motivated to go and write about it.

Of the like 20 places they were going to protest, 15 of them were Jewish locations. They have some really horribly hateful things to say about Jews.

And then the day came that they were going to be here, the first day, and I thought, you know, it's rainy out and they were going to be all the way up north in Boulder and they weren't hitting too many Jewish groups that day, it was mostly high schools and churches and I was FAR south of there at work that day... and I was thinking, oh well, maybe I'll go tomorrow.

And I looked at the schedule for the next day and it was the beginning of the sabbath, it was Friday. I thought, I should go... but then I thought maybe I won't go, it's the sabbath. I'm not going to go before the sabbath and I have to work that day... maybe I just won't go.

And then I looked at their protest schedule for Saturday and it was pretty much exclusively Jewish organizations that they were protesting. Not just protesting but they were planning to be outside before Saturday morning services and during the service. While people were praying, they wanted to disrupt the prayer. And I thought to myself I should go, I should go, I should go and videotape it and see what's happening. And I then thought to myself, nah, you know, it's the sabbath and I don't like to work on my Shabbat and I don't like to videotape or use electronics on Shabbat.

Why am I going to put myself out and watch these people protest while people are praying?
Could the best protest that I could participate in be davvening, praying, myself?

And I never ended up making it to any of the protests or counter-protests, though I completely support the people who got out there a stood up for love and not hate. We have a really phenomenal group of people that got out there to all of these sites and stood up to these people and counter-protested their hate. But you know, I realized these people who are full of hatred don't deserve my energy or my thoughts or any sort of positive energy that I might exude or throw off of my being, that they would receive by them being in MY presence.

I can't say that we can totally ignore them because sometimes that just isn't right but I won't be writing about them beyond this blog entry and I certainly won't be mentioning their name.

But I will be praying that that their message of hate dies soon.

(Originally posted at the Jewish Portal at Patheos)

Masters Degree and Final Capstone

2010-04-26T12:43:00.000-06:00

Hey all -

So I am in the depths of hell that is the research proposal for my Master's Capstone (kinda like a thesis).

My topic revolves around social media measurement. Currently, I am working on the proposal but once I get into the actual paper, I am hoping to reach into my digital network and get advice or opinions from you all.

Some of my twitter followers have expressed and interest in the process and so I will be blogging about it here. If you are interested in following my process, I will be tagging these posts with the tag - Capstone.

If you are not interested... well... sorry. ;) I promise to keep up my odd and varied posting.

Shoes (From Patheos.com)

2010-04-22T11:29:00.001-06:00

Shoes
by Talia Davis

I have a closet full of them. Some people don't even think about them. Some people think about them way too much.

Shoes protect our feet, they enable us to go anywhere we want without concern for what the terrain is. We pay a lot of money for very uncomfortable ones, and sometimes our favorites are the ones we have had for years. I feel fortunate I own more than one pair.

Shoes can be easily overlooked.

Not on the bank of the Danube River in Budapest.

A simple memorial has stood there since 2005. A memorial you may just miss unless you get close.

Shoes.
Sixty pairs of
empty
iron shoes.

They are old-fashioned. They may just look like some crazy art nouveau thing.

Until you get closer.

The unrest in Budapest regarding the Jews culminated on the night of January 8, 1945. Jews in Budapest were rounded up and made to stand on the bank of the Danube River... as pictured on the left.

Sometimes, two people were chained together. One was shot and the other was dragged into the water where they drowned.

Sometimes they just shot people and pushed them in the icy waters.

Sometimes they attached weights to the people before they shot them.

Men, women... children.

Two hundred human beings.

All that was left was their shoes. Their valuable shoes.

After all, a dead person doesn't need shoes.

This mass murder was perpetrated by the Arrow Cross party whose members were big fans of Hitler and his policies. They were only too happy to help along his final solution.

I look at my shoes differently now. They aren't just a fashion accessory or necessary evil to get from A to B. They are a reminder that I am alive. They remind me that I live in a free country, in a world that will not tolerate this type of behavior. They tell me my extended family did not die in vain.

Baruch atah Hashem Eloheinu melech ha'olam, dayan ha-emet.

Blessed are You, Adonai, our G-d, Counselor of the universe, the True Judge.

This is what we say when we hear of someone passing. It is our way to say that we accept the unacceptable.

For short, Baruch Dayan Emet. Blessed is the True Judge.

(Originally posted at Patheos.com. For more details on Jewish topics, visit Patheos)

Talia Davis is the daughter, granddaughter, and great-granddaughter of rabbis. While her direct family had immigrated to America prior to WWII, she lost extended family to the Holocaust. Her great-grandfather stood in protest of Hitler's policies in America, wearing a yellow star of David on his clothing in an attempt to bring awareness to the horrors he knew were being perpetrated against the Jews in his parents' homeland of Germany. Talia directs the Jewish Portal at Patheos and manages the site's online community.

Photos - #1. laurnia.blogspot.com, 2. Doctors and their patients slaughtered by the Arrow Cross Militia in Budapest via Wikimedia CC, 3. laurnia.blogspot.com

Looking for Personal Holocaust Stories

2010-04-21T13:52:00.000-06:00

So I recently blogged about my experience with a Holocaust survivor as a 5 year old and that got me (and my mom) thinking...

Since we are sadly losing our connection to this actual survivors, who will tell this story to our children?

I am looking for personal experiences with Holocaust survivors and their impact on you. If you have a story like this or would like to write A FACTUAL account for me, please send me an email at taliashewrote at gmail dot com (put it all together with an @ and a . and there you go)!

Thanks!

Never Again...

2010-04-19T13:34:00.002-06:00

I saw this video on Rabbi Brad Hirschfield's blog and it really touched me.

It more than touched me, it had me in tears. What a powerful piece.

I hope you share it far and wide.

The past is getting further and further away...

2010-04-12T10:00:00.006-06:00

I remember him so clearly. This older rabbi. Mind you, most of the rabbis in my life are family members but this time it was different. My dad was the rabbi at the Hillel and we were members at Temple Sinai. So for once in my life, "my" rabbi wasn't my dad or grandfather.

If I close my eyes, I can see him. I can see the moment that is seared into my memory. I was only 5. That's how strong of an impression he left.

I remember that he wore suits all the time. I never saw him take his jacket off (at least my child's memory is that I never saw that).

There was one day, specifically that I remember... in fact, it is one of very few memories of have of the two short years my family lived in Illinois.

I was in Sunday school and my favorite place to play was the tables. You know, the water table, the sand table... I was elbows deep in the water table when the rabbi came in to our classroom to say hello. I invited him to play with me at the water table and he obliged.

He took off his jacket and rolled up his dress shirt sleeves. Not unusual in my 5 year old brain. Rabbis played with me all the time. One of the benefits of being an RK (rabbi's kid)... I met very well known rabbis and they would get on the floor and play dollies with me. But something was different this time.

He put his hands in the water and I saw it.

: Holocaust tattoo thanks to MarkMallett.com for the image

His number tattoo. (That is not him pictured above)

I don't think I ever said anything to him about that. I don't really think I talked to anyone about it. Even at 5, I got it. The Holocaust was seared into my being at such a young age.

I became haunted by it. Not his tattoo but the Holocaust. I read every book available to me. I looked horrific pictures. I dreamed that I lived it. It was all so real to me. As a tween, I would always be on alert. When I went somewhere new I would look around, trying to figure out how to hide if the Nazis burst in the door. What did I have on me that identified myself as a Jew? Would I have been strong enough to survive, even if my family perished?

I was haunted for years. The Holocaust had become far too real for me. My personal Holocaust experience culminated with me playing Anne Frank in a theatre production in Colorado. I had nightmares every night. I woke up screaming every morning. I lived her life onstage and in my dreams. But that finally broke my obsession with the Holocaust.

: Opening of Act II: Margot, Anne, and Mother (Anne Frank, Longmont Theatre Company - 2005)

But Rabbi Neuman's tattoo never left me. There are a few things I always think of when I think back to our short time in Illinois... our wonderful neighbors, Beverly my pretend grandma, the only time in my life when I got grounded (for walking over to Beverly's house without telling my parents... she lived next door), my little brother as a toddler figuring out the latch on the door and locking himself out in the snow in only a diaper, running wild through the halls of the Hillel, and Rabbi Neuman's arm.

Recently, I looked him up again and learned more about the arm I see in my dreams. He was born in Poland in 1922 and studied in three Talmudic academies in three different European cities before the Nazis came. He survived SIX Nazi camps including Auschwitz and Mauthausen. His whole family perished - parents and six sisters and one younger brother. He came to the US in 1950 with nothing. No money, no family, and no English. Thanks to the Jewish community, he went to University of Cincinnati and HUC in Cincinnati. He has done so much over his career but one part I found fascinating was that he marched with the late Rev Dr Martin Luther King Jr in 1965... and so did my grandfather.

But there are less and less Rabbi Neuman's out there. We are slowly losing the generation that survived the Holocaust. The personal testimony is getting harder and harder to find. Thankfully we have been recording their stories to share with our children but make no mistake, nothing will get be as impactful as seeing a tattoo on the arm of a sweet and kind rabbi at the water table.

Zachor.

Remember.

(Here is a link to Rabbi Neuman's book -
The Narrow Bridge: BEYOND THE HOLOCAUST)

(Originally posted at Patheos)

This makes me nauseous...

2010-04-09T15:57:00.000-06:00

What a horrible human being.

Counting the Omer...

2010-04-09T10:00:00.001-06:00

Sometimes it is wicked annoying. One more thing to do at night when I am exhausted. I really just wanna read my (e)book and go to bed. But man oh man... sometimes... who am I kidding, usually the day's Omer is dead on.

So you may have no idea what I am talking about. Let me explain. For the 49 days between Passover and Shavuot we literally count each night. It starts on the second night of Passover with 1 and it ends on the night before Shavuot with 49, which is seven weeks of the Omer. Some people choose to use seven of the sephirot (similar to the chakras) to guide them through this Omer process. The 49 days of the Omer is a time to reflect on self and inner growth. Additionally, this is a time where we are in a level of mourning. There are many theories behind why this is anywhere from a plague that killed 24,000 of Rabbi Akiva's students to a time to honor those who rose up against the oppressive Roman rule and were killed. Some even postulate that this is a time period to honor all the Jews killed in all the pogroms and crusades.

So during this time halacha (Jewish law) forbids us from getting haircuts or having weddings or parties. The only outlier? Day 33 (or four weeks and five days of the Omer) is called Lag B'Omer (literally, in Hebrew it means the 33rd day of the Omer). This is a seriously joyous holiday and all mourning activities are forbidden.

On Lag B'Omer you are supposed to sing and dance, have picnics, shoot arrows, have bonfires, and cut your hair. In fact, it is a big honor to have an Upshernish (a little boy's first hair cut on his 3rd birthday) or a wedding on Lag B'Omer.

Anyway, there is your introduction to the Omer...

The point is...
Today's Omer is this - Today is 10 days which is one week and three days of the Omer. Representing tiferet of gevurah or compassion in discipline.

It ends with saying - Tiferet is a result of total selflessness in the eyes of G-d. You love for no reason, you love because you are a reflection of G-d.

Wow. Finding the discipline in love. It is so hard and it is so hard to love without expecting something back.

It's hard to be a reflection of G-d, all that human stuff gets in the way.

Facebook Censorship

2010-04-08T14:46:00.001-06:00

I use Facebook daily. In fact, I am on Facebook pretty much all day. That is my job. I post to Facebook for Patheos and I keep my eye out for best practices and new ideas.

Today, I got a HUGE fail whale. Facebook wouldn't let me log in this afternoon because of "site maintenance." In the middle of the day? That's weird.

But then I saw this blog - On Facebook Deactivations

That makes me nervous, people. I post regularly about religion (granted, it's mostly mine and then the Patheos content on the Patheos page but still...) I like the fact that users have the power to get rid of abusive users or hate groups (like these - Hatred of Jews on Facebook, Does Facebook Hate Israel, or "ALL BIG NOSED JEWS DIE I HATE YOU ALL!!!!GAS SHOWERS FOR ALL JEWS!!!!!HITLER YOU ARE GOD!!!DEATH TO ALL JEWS BURN BURN BURN" - kinda messed up, right?) but to take off users because there is a collective of people out there that are mad because some people have left their faith?

This is an issue near and dear to my heart as a Community Manager. I had to develop processes and terms of use for Patheos when I first came on board so I could manage the community functions on the site. I know things get heated on CNN or ESPN forums but on a site dedicated to providing a balanced view on religion and spirituality... yeah, we were pretty sure it would devolve into nasty. Thankfully we haven't had too much of that, yet, but Facebook needs to evaluate how they are going to manage complaints without stripping a ton of people of their FB accounts or letting people be abused.

Something is just wrong here. And there is a fine line between expressing your opinion or belief and being hateful. You can express your faith or belief without using hate speech. When censorship dips it's quill into a scary inkwell and starts eliminating innocents along with the guilty, people start to get more mad.

What a sad world when you have to defend from hate with one hand and hold off big brother with the other.

Challah Baby... an update

2010-04-02T14:00:00.003-06:00

Okay, first of all, if you haven't read Challah Baby (the original) I highly recommend reading it first. Life will make a lot more sense... trust me.

It's okay... we'll wait.

Back? Oh good.

So it has been a little over three months now and no word from my friend. Now in my mind that could mean several things. One: she isn't pregnant, it didn't work and she doesn't want to talk about it. Okay. I won't push. Or two: she is pregnant but holding to the tradition to not talk about it until she is safe and into her second trimester.

I'm not going to lie, I didn't think about it all the time. It wasn't life consuming but every time I saw a post from one of my millions of pregnant friends on Facebook, I thought of D. I was just hoping and praying and keeping her in my prayers that she had conceived or will conceive. But I didn't want to push it.

Until I got an email.

It said:
Dear Challah Bakers,

I selected December 18 pretty much at random only later to find out that it was the original birthday of my husband's Granny Rose - known especially for her intuitive ability and faith in matters spiritual. She changed her birthday much later in life to November 18 so that she could celebrate together with her son-in-law my husband's father!

Today I am so happy to share with you that I am pregnant and well in to my second trimester. I have already had 5 (yes 5!!!) ultrasounds so far indicating that thank g-d everything seems to be going well. Thank you all so much for sharing this journey with me. I continue to bake and if you should need a prayer please do not hesitate to let me know.

SHE'S PREGNANT! YES!

Now, being somewhat scientifically minded, I am totally not willing to say that the loaf of bread I baked on the same night 60 other people did it and the prayers I said along with tons of her friends actually contributed to her conception but... I can't deny the fact that it seemed to help.

So where do science and faith collide?

Where we are willing to let them. When we can say to ourselves, I don't know how or why but it worked and I am rejoicing.

Exodus 15:20-21 says: "Miriam took the timbrel in her hand and all the women followed her. And Miriam called to them, 'Sing to G-d...'" (Hear Debbie Friedman's version here)

Here we are, at the time where we gained our freedom from Mitzraym (Egypt) and the women sang to G-d before heading out into the desert for 40 years. 3 months ago, 61 women sang out to G-d through our Challah baking and G-d responded!

I couldn't be happier for D, M & their daughter R! Mazal and bracha! I know this baby will bring you lots of nachas!

(originally posted at Patheos)

Next Year in Jerusalem... or the White House, depends on who you know...

2010-03-28T14:05:00.001-06:00

This morning, while my friends at my neighborhood car repair shop were fixing my car to the tune of several hundred dollars (ugh), I sat in Starbucks with my Sunday New York Times.

I love the Sunday New York Times. I live in Denver now but I was born in Manhattan to a mother from Queens and no matter where we moved across the US, I always had a soft spot for a Bialy. Anyway, I love the Sunday Styles sections and my favorite way to finish my coffee is with the weddings... I'm not going to lie, sometimes I cheat and head straight to the weddings and engagements section. Today, though, something caught my eye on the front page.

Next Year in the White House: A Seder Tradition

WHAT?! Okay, we all watch the President light the giant Chabad menorah during Chanukkah but a Passover Seder? Really? Isn't that a little odd? Well the oddities continued in the article. This is no big fancy dinner with all the well know rabbis and prominent Jews... this is a private and personal meal in the Old Family Dining Room with just a few friends and Jewish staffers... who give the White House kitchen their family recipes. No traditional waiters, the President and First Lady pass the brisket... but the gefilte fish is already plated.

WHAT?! And with everything going on between Israel and the US right now?!

I guess we need to learn how it got started. Turns out three Jewish staffers on the campaign trail in 2008 were stuck. They couldn't make it home for this BIG family holiday and wanted to connect with their ancestors. So they went to a basement room at a hotel with found matzah and Manischewitz to make a Seder... It started peachy... until they heard that undeniable voice behind them, "Is this the Seder?"

Obama and some African American staffers and friends came to join. Talk about sharing something... Jews and Blacks coming together to remember the slavery that they shared... thousands of years apart. Kinda like the camaraderie in the '60's between these two groups (read more about that and MLK here).

What I think is so cool about this is that it's personal. Not for the press or the tourists or to make him look better to the Jews... it was something his staffers needed and he participated in and he kept it familial. His daughters ask the four questions and they all read together.

That's what Pesach is about. We must teach our children the lessons of our people, our exodus from the land of Mitzrayim, Egypt. But we also must share with our neighbors. Some very Orthodox people hold the view that you shouldn't invite non-Jews to a seder since while you are allowed to cook for yourself on this chag (or holiday... meaning that you usually can't work or cook), you can't cook for a non-Jew who can clearly cook for themselves... well... I respectfully disagree that this means you shouldn't invite non-Jews. It is important to share our culture and traditions. When we close ourselves off, it leads to rumors of children's blood in our matzah! (Not kidding. Read here & here)

And as usual, I find myself on a tangent. As a person who voted for Obama (I really don't want to make this political), this is one of the reasons why I appreciate him so much. I feel like he actually cares to learn more about the salad that is the US of A. (We prefer salad to melting pot... a melting pot makes it all the same, a salad's ingredients retain their personal identity while becoming a part of something bigger.)

So I hope Mr. President and his family and family of friends enjoy their Passover seder this year. And here's to hoping there isn't a Macaroon Security Standoff this year... hehe!

Read the New York Times story here.

Originally posted on my blog at Patheos.

My Daddy Always Said There'd Be Days Like This...

2010-03-25T20:29:00.006-06:00

Just had a lively dispute on Twitter with a very conservative fella who told me I'm a Marxist because I believe in helping my fellow (wo)man.

He was kinda abrasive and rude (and I'm not gunna lie, I was rude back) but despite being annoyed and wanting to leave the convo, I stayed and chatted.

With plenty of parries and repostes, we tossed 140 characters back and forth. And I am sure he still doesn't like me and frankly, I'm not super thrilled about him but at least it was an intelligent conversation (though I could have done without him calling me all the 'ist' names in the book that he didn't agree with).

I simultaneously HATE discussing politics (or the negative aspects of religion for that matter) and am motivated and inspired by it. I truly believe that none of us knows all and we all must keep learning and moving. I guess that's one of my problems with the 'ists - (just like in Judaism, as my father says - when you call yourself a movement, you stop moving) - in politics, when we decide that something is Capitalist or Marxist or Socialist or Blahist... we lock that idea into a box and never let it develop.

What if we threw the titles out the window and just picked up the good ideas from each? What if we didn't have to take each 'ist to the horrible conclusion that each reaches it we go to the extreme?

I don't know. But I do know that the way people are acting right now... conservatives, liberals... I don't like it. It is pushing us further and further from a solution. And people like Glenn Beck and, yes, liberals too that jump to the most horrible conclusion and scare the people who listen to them out of their wits AREN'T HELPING. They are just preening and prancing and trying to promote themselves, not liberty or safe and healthy living.

Oh well. Dad always said, "We have to agree to disagree." Not always satisfying but makes for a much better life than fighting everyone.

I really do love this video. The first 14 minutes really hits home... http://bit.ly/daCPM0

Negative Body Image and Greek Life

2010-03-11T15:52:00.002-07:00

So many of you know that I am the Chapter Advisor for my sorority at University of Colorado - Boulder.

I really love:

My girls (even though they aren't always nice to me)
My volunteer role (even though it isn't always easy)
My sorority & our international team of volunteers (no even though here...)

For me, joining Gamma Phi Beta was an incredible experience. I had gone through almost 2 years of university being a GDI (g-d damn independent) and hanging only with the theatre people before I realized... I needed a broader social circle. I am by no means a "stereotypical" sorority girl but I don't think anyone at my school was. The women who are now and will always be my closest friends are the women I graduated with and were in my Gamma Phi chapter (go Epsilon Zeta at JU!).

Becoming the advisor at CU was definitely a culture shock. My chapter had 30 girls, this one has 180... It's a big school with a big football team, and when I got here, a big drinking problem. Not our chapter necessarily but the school as a whole. We had so many barriers to success over the past four years but I am SO proud of where we stand today with the university. Now I know what it took to get here and I know that a lot of my women think I forgot what it was like to be a college student (HA! That's funny... I remember it all and I remember saying the same things about my advisors) but the reality is that I've grown up and seen the affects of that lifestyle on women and I want to help every woman I come in contact with.

So I was fairly disturbed when I read this article - Sororities and Negative Body Image - what struck me the most was that the women more attracted to Greek life were women with a lower self esteem and body image to begin with. AND that instead of empowering these women, this study found that they actually perceived themselves worse. That's not what we are here for.

Sorority women are empowered. We are creating our own networking opportunities. We are making a family where none existed. Our founders were strong women, pioneers and our ritual and ideals have changed little since our founding (in GPhi's case - in 1874). So why does this study show the opposite affect?

I don't know. Don't have a clue. Wish I had an answer. I just know that I love and truly care for all 180 of my women and would do anything for them (that would promote the highest type of womanhood).

What does G-d mean?

2010-03-11T12:14:00.002-07:00

A friend just posted on her Facebook a conversation with her almost 3 year old daughter. It went like this -

Kid: What does god mean?
Mom: Love.
Kid: If I wear my purple tights will I look like a dancer?
… I guess I passed lesson one on spirituality 101.

I love this exchange. It really gets to the heart of kids. They have ideas, they want to share ideas, and they want simple answers.

In the Passover seder we talk about the four children and how we respond to their questions. Within the responses we say, “It is because of what G-d did for me when I left Egypt.” We tell the children what our connection is, what G-d did for me. This opens the door to let the child’s beautiful imagination construct the image that they need of G-d. This is why my friend’s answer worked. To her, G-d = love. Love is a concept the little girl understands in her little girl mind. She could think it means hugs or bedtime stories or pancakes on Sunday but every time she thinks of these things, she will think about G-d… until the next distraction… like her purple tights and looking like a dancer.

Another friend, with several little girls under the age of 10 was telling me the other day that #4, the 2 1/2 year old, often comes up to her and says, “Now mommy, don’t laugh” or she will walk up to mom, look at her, look over her own shoulder, sigh and walk away. As if it would be too difficult to explain to an adult her thoughts. Kids want the answers, they want you to take them seriously but don’t get too caught up in the details. Tell them it’s because of how you perceive it and let them explore it.

And sometimes, we have to realize that they are just so much smarter than us in their simplicity and respect that.

I think this quote sums it up so well -
“Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.” - Antoine de Saint-Exupery, “The Little Prince”, 1943

Originally posted at Patheos.com - AshkanOrthoNewalForm-ish

Neo-Nazi Converts To JUDAISM!

2010-02-26T12:12:00.002-07:00

Okay... so I thought the headline might be a bit sensationalist... I was wrong.

Here's a story of a Polish man who embraced Neo-Nazi ideals with his Neo-Nazi wife, only to find out that they both, in fact, had maternal Jewish grandparents. They both converted to Orthodox Judaism.

From Skinhead to Orthodox Jew

WOW!

Idiocy... even in the best of circles...

2010-02-25T12:11:00.005-07:00

So I found this blog post MoVinG oN and was just shocked... but then I remembered that every community has their own crazies...

I really hope that my generation and the next can convince the oldies that the world truly has changed.

I had this idea, and I was chatting it out with a co-worker, that we get a bunch of rabbis (or make it interfaith) to sit down and "re-write" the Torah for a modern day audience. What would it say? Would Noah's flood be Hurricane Katrina? Would G!d have written something about cell phones on shabbis? What about the common abuse of the shabbis goy?

At some point we have to realize it isn't the middle ages anymore...

Anyway, just one woman's thoughts.

(FYI - I am not an official representative of anything or anyone except for myself. And I don't have a mechitza on my comment wall.)
______________________________
UPDATE! 2.26.10
Hi all my loyal readers! I am sure you have been watching this saga with baited breath... ;) I have just found out that this was an elaborate Purim prank. Nice work guys... You had me fooled (and indignant)! Here is Altie's post about the prank - It Was All A Joke

And here are the pranksters... Va'ad Shmiras Hadas V'hatarah "official" blog and this is TRS and Yossi ... This is TRS ... and this is Yossi!

And so begins the rest

2010-02-22T11:51:00.002-07:00

And I mean that both in this is the "rest" of my blog and on Shabbis, we "rest." Before I get started, since I tend to explain why certain things are while in the context of the experience, I will indent these informative sections, to make it easier to read.

So we left off with the sirens going off and Shabbis starting. What is done, is done at that point and you can't start cooking anything or put on makeup or clean the house. A sense of calm falls over this small section of Brooklyn.

We went to shul at 770 Eastern Parkway... known as just 770. This was the Rebbe's home and shul. The weekend that I happened to be there was Chof Beis Shvat.

Chof Beis Shvat is the yartzeit of the Rebbe's wife - the Rebbetzin. On her yartzeit, all the rabbi's wives, the rebbetzins from around the world, come to Crown Heights for a convention. There are literally thousands of women in town for that weekend. It's called the Kinus for short. So when these women, who come from places like India, China, Russia, Key West, Alaska, etc, come to town, they all want to davven in the Rebbe's shul. The last time I was in CH for Chof Beis Shvat, I was literally jostled out the door of the women's section. I was still a "newbie" to the CH seen and wasn't so confident... and well... I grew up in a non-pushing house... so I let myself be jostled out the door.

This year was different.

I was staying with a (new but very dear) friend whom we shall call RL and her sister CB. We went to shul and we pushed our way right in. We smushed into the small women's area, above where the men were praying.

Why were the men and women separated, you ask? Well there are lots of laws and reasoning behind using a mechitza and many different ways they can look. Essentially, it is a separation of men and women but don't get the wrong idea, it isn't because there is a fault in the women. The fact is, women are not required to do any time-bound commandments. Why? Because they are the primary caretakers of the home and children. (Don't balk, you know it's true! Husband and wife both work, both come home tired, 9 times out of 10 who makes dinner and gives the kids a bath? It's in our nature, ladies! Embrace it!) So women shouldn't feel rushed or pushed to do the mitzvot or commandments that have a certain time frame. Now there is the issue with men being distracted. You know it's true. A pretty lady walks in, the men look up... well they HAVE TO do the time-bound mitzvot so we let them focus. Frankly, it's more a statement that men are easily distracted than that women are lesser. So mechitza's come in different fashions... pretty (and tall) flowers, a movable wall, etched glass, or the separate section completely. In 770, the main hall is where the men davven and there is a gallery upstairs where the women sit and there is a separate entrance. I borrowed this pic from crownheights.info - on the left side of the image, in the back where the Hebrew writing is one of the women's sections. There are windows down to the floor.

SO, we found a couple of seats, sorta, and a couple of siddurs, sorta, and began to davven. One thing I love about Chabad davvening is you can catch up if you need to and sorta go at your own pace. When we finished davvening, we chatted for a bit but we were getting pushed to and fro by people leaving and new people coming to get in their evening shabbis prayers. We fought our way out (it was like being a sardine!) and heading to our host for shabbis dinner. I didn't know the couple who we were eating by (yes, in CH you say "Who are you eating BY?" Who are you staying BY?" instead of with) but they were friends of my friends. One thing you will notice is that everyone is very friendly and welcoming. Their homes are very open to you. We arrived at S & T's home for shabbis dinner and began the climb. Just like you can't cook or clean on shabbis, you also can't use an elevator. So their apartment becomes a 6th floor walk-up on shabbis. 6 flights of stairs (with banisters with wet paint on them, thanks Super!) later, we walked in to a beautiful NYC apartment and wonderful hosts. We made the blessings over the wine, washing our hands, and the bread and then we dug in.

Now you should understand that there are courses here. First comes the fish and salads. Oh you could fill up on that alone! Gefilte fish, two kinds of salad, babganush, and challah. Then we move on to soup. Next, is the main course, usually meat and sides. And finally tea and desert.

It was such good company and delicious food. We chatted and ate until 1am! Some people falling asleep for a few minutes on the couch here and there. Finally, we went home and fell into bed. We work up on shabbis morning after letting ourselves sleep in a bit. We drank some tea (from water that was kept hot all night) and had breakfast. RL and I walked to another shul to find a woman she wanted to chat with. When the woman wasn't there, we stopped by another friend's house and chatted. It was all so easy going. No purse, no phone, nothin! Then we made our way to our shabbis lunch. The hosts were a very kind couple and their children. Their row house was incredibly beautiful (it's amazing what people do with little space and less yard in NYC!) and the meal was delicious. We had just an incredible chat with our host and hostess and then headed home for our shabbis shluff (Yiddish for nap).

We we woke up, it was time for havdallah, which marks the end of the sabbath. We went to the girls' landlord's apartment to hear him do havdallah. Such a sweet, older couple. When it was finished we headed down to change and get ready for the evening events. You know how in the secular world we go out on Friday and Saturday nights? Well, Saturday night or motzi shabbis, is party time!

There were a million things going on in the neighborhood that night! Whispers of Moshe Hecht doing a concert somewhere nearby, someone saw Matisyahu and his wife going out to something else... such a buzz on the street where just minutes before, there was silence!

We ended up at a program that Nightlife was throwing. Nightlife is a great initiative in Crown Heights for single women. They host programs every week to get the women together and just have a place to hang out. That night Rebbetzin Nechama Eilfort was speaking. She and her husband are the leaders of the Chabad of La Costa California. She gave a great talk about going on Shlichus and how even the most unsuspecting woman could find her own way while giving back to other Jews. She was a great speaker. BUT now it was time for the whole reason I went to Crown Heights... My friend's l'chaim!

So let's explain the connection. I went to Bais Chana and met my dear friend E. I went to Bais Chana because a dear friend in Denver, DL, suggested it. Shortly after we got home, E got engaged to DL's brother! So fun when you know both sides involved! :) So I trek over to the l'chaim from Nightlife.

Technically, L'chaim means "to life" in Hebrew. Since there is a lot of celebrating and drinking of L'chaims at an engagement party, they have come to be called "a L'chaim."A L'chaim and a Vort are pretty much the same thing. A L'chaim tends to be more informal and a Vort, more formal but that word isn't used in all circles. (Vort means 'word' in Yiddish, referring to the words of Torah the groom shares.) At the formal engagement celebration, some communities have the groom sign a tenaim document which literally means conditions and is like his acceptance of his obligations to his future wife. Once the document is signed, the mothers of the bride and groom with smash a plate, reminding us that even in the happy times, we mourn the destruction of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem. Since the tenaim is a serious halachic document (Jewish law), some groups won't sign it until the wedding day to avoid having to break the agreement.

It is crazy and packed! E has tons of friends and for the first time, that I have witnessed, the women's side is bigger than the men's! :) We hug and laugh, dance and eat. We stayed until after 1am! It was such a joyous event!

One more note about Jewish engagements... well, especially in this Chassidic community. It is Chabad custom to NOT present the bride with a diamond engagement ring. I know this is very different than mainstream society. The reason is that a Jewish marriage can be established in a number of ways and presenting a ring of value to a women, in front of witnesses can constitute a marriage. To avoid concerns about when and if the marriage actually took place, the groom (in this community) will often present his kallah (bride) with a necklace or watch. There are also progressive gifts given. A bride might receive an engagement watch, then a necklace before the party, a plain gold band at the wedding and then earrings and a diamond ring to complete her jewelry set. Additionally, during the wedding, it is never (within the context of this group) a double ring ceremony. Not only do men not wear jewelry but there is a bigger concern here. The ring is a gift to the bride from the groom and the brides acceptance of the ring is an acceptance of the marriage proposal and terms in the Ketubah. If the rings are exchanged, the transaction is as if it did not occur or that the bride is returning the groom's gift.

In the marriage ceremony, they say "behold, you become holy unto me with this ring." The ring must be clear as to what it is... the diamond could be fake, the etching could have lessened the value and if that is the case, the marriage's legal status could be called into question. Better to not have a question. The groom must OWN the ring he gives his bride. Therefore, he has to finish paying on it or if it is an heirloom, it must be given as a gift to him to them pass on. Anyway, I know I have gone on a tangent here but I find these customs so facinating!

After a few short hours of sleep, I head to the airport on Sunday. My mom, a former New Yorker, called on mozti shabbis (after shabbis) to request that I bring her back some bialys. Turns out that NY Jewish tradition hadn't hit the Crown Heights neighborhood yet but I brought her a half dozen of the best NY bagels I could find.

Traveling to NY and Crown Heights is like stepping into another world. I enjoy myself every single time. This particular trip, I met so many wonderful people and made some great Jewish connections. I can't wait to go back for the wedding... which is March 7, by the way. Maybe you will get a blog (or 3) about the Chabad Jewish wedding! :)

Originally posted at Patheos.com - AshkanOrthoNewalForm-ish

Shabbis in Crown Heights

2010-02-18T15:50:00.000-07:00

I attended a Chabad l'chaim a couple weekends ago in Crown Heights.

For those of you who don't know, Crown Heights is the World-Wide Headquarters of the Lubavitcher movement. It is as close as you will get to a shtetl in modern day America. With the main arteries of Kingston and Eastern Parkway, Judaism springs from either side. Most of the row houses shooting off these main roads are adorned with a mezuzah. If not, then they house neighbors who are generally of African-American or Afro-Caribbean decent. If you have never experienced a shabbat in Crown Heights, you must. I am serious. Email me at Patheos (tdavis at Patheos dot com) and I will help you find a place to stay. It is a must!

For those of you who have not or could not stay in CH, let me paint the scene of my weekend in Brooklyn.

Friday morning, 6am - my red-eye flight from Denver lands at JFK in NYC. I am with the mother and two sisters of the groom and a very awesome woman who is heading to CH to teach Chabad women how to fundraise. [Background - I am very close with the sister of the groom (the chasson) and the bride (the kallah). We spent a week studying in FL together.] After we gather our luggage, we go to catch a cab. It's about 6:30/6:45am at this point. We have to wait for a cab large enough to fit luggage + people. We make the squeeze and we are off. We tell our VERY Russian cab driver that we are going to Brooklyn but must detour to Queens first to go to The Ohel, which is at a cemetery. It is the grave-site of The Lubavitcher Rebbe and his father-in-law, The Previous Rebbe or Frediker Rebbe. Within Chabad, anytime you are in NY, you must visit. Not because you are forced to but because it can be centering and uplifting and is an important thing to do.

We tell the guy that we are going to a cemetery in Queens and he pulls out a picture of The Rebbe and says, "For this guy?" Well we were shocked! He knew exactly where to go. Turns out, the guy is Jewish, brings people to the cemetery all the time but had never gone in. Well we get to The Ohel and the cab driver wants to leave us. I know in the movies it always looks like there is always a cab when you need one but that is SO not the case. We convinced him that he should wait 20 min and come in with us. SO meter still running, we go in and start the process.

We wash our hand in the ritual manner (netilat yadayim) then sit down to write a letter to the Rebbes. You put your Hebrew name, bat (daughter of) or bar (son of), then your mother's Hebrew name. Then you just write. You can ask for a better job, a husband or wife, health, anything you want or need or need guidance on. Once you have completed your letter, you slip off your shoes (if they have leather on them) and slip on the oh-so-convenient Crocs they have provided in every size and color imaginable. (P.S. I think Chosids are the biggest consumer of Crocs... not kidding.)

Once you have done all this you trek out into the cemetery and enter the stone building (no roof) where the two graves are. You light a candle, grab a prayer book and head in. There are separate doors for men and women but it gets cramped really fast. Once inside there are a handful of prayers and psalms to read but then you read your letter, quietly outloud to the Rebbes. Once you have competed that, you tear it to little bits (see the pic). As you leave, you must be careful not to turn your back on the Rebbes, just like the Torah, and so people will back out of the area. I like to take a minute to touch each gravestone and say S'hma with each Rebbe.

Once you have completed all this, you head back to the tent that is set up and wash your hands again and head out. We wrangled all 5 of us AND we picked up another woman heading to CH so our cab was VERY full.

We got to Eastern Parkway and Kingston and all went our separate ways. Now here comes Shabbis in Crown Heights. It's still early, not quite 9am yet. I put my bags down in my friend's tiny basement apartment and I start walking Kingston, marveling at the shops we don't have in Denver (but they don't have a Target... so it might be an even trade... :)).

I had priorities. There were things I can't get in Denver that I had to get before Shabbis shuts the stores down. I hit the Jewish Children's Museum because they were open before 9am. Got some books and a set of Aleph Bet cookie cutters (VERY excited) and then I headed to Khan's Kosher Market. There are a few markets on the street but I KNOW Khan's has my Kosher gummy bears. Seriously. I can't find them ANYWHERE (see my post here about that). And finally Judaica World opened. I spent forever in there, breathing in the books, looking for new titles, I got a cd, AND (I feel very triumphant about this) a pink, soft leather siddur with the Hebrew AND the English!!! :) Very exciting! (I will write more about that later.) Kingston was full of hustle and bustle. Women getting last minute supplies, car horns, construction, men running to study or get home. Just like you imagine NYC. I headed back to my friend's apartment and took a bit of a shluff (nap). We woke up in time to prepare her place for Shabbis. You have to decide what lights to leave on and what to leave off, prep water for tea if you want it in the next 26 hours, etc... otherwise that all will become Muktza. Once that is done and about 18 minutes before Shabbis comes in, you will hear a loud siren. This is to warn you that it is nearly time. Everyone keeps running and rushing and trying to finish until... BAM candles are lit and there is silence. Significantly less cars on the road, no radios, just quiet. And Shabbis has begun.

And since this post is getting lengthy, I will break it up. Tomorrow - the start of a beautiful 26 hours.

Originally posted at Patheos.com - AshkanOrthoNewalForm-ish

WOW! Plane crash in Austin...

2010-02-18T12:58:00.002-07:00

WOW! I really am at a loss of words. Wow... There was a plane crash in Austin this morning. A man flew a small, single engine plane into a building. But then I learned more.

The "man" was a human being who was much maligned and the victim of our country. He was a throw away person to our tax system. And the building was an IRS building. His name was Andrew Joseph Stack. 53 years old, I believe.

Now, please don't get me wrong, I don't approve of his methods. He has probably cost the life of many innocent people, however, I feel for this man. How could he continue to live when the greedy government attacked him. Honestly? He was small potatoes but that is what they seem to go after. Now, I know how I sound but believe me I am a Democrat and I believe in social services and everyone pitching in to support those among us who cannot support themselves. But in this situation, he followed the rules. He made more of an effort than I ever did to learn the rules...

More than anything I feel for his loved ones, because I know he had to have been loved. How sad that he was driven to this. I think our whole country needs an overhaul.

I also want to preserve his final words for all to see because undoubtedly his website will be ripped down when they get wind of it. The website is www.embeddedart.com ... oh and as I write this... it has been removed by the FBI. Here is what it says now -

"This website has been taken offline due to the sensitive nature of the events that transpired in Texas this morning and in compliance with a request from the FBI. Regards,
T35 Hosting"

Here is the text of his manifesto after the jump.

If you’re reading this, you’re no doubt asking yourself, “Why did this have to happen?” The simple truth is that it is complicated and has been coming for a long time. The writing process, started many months ago, was intended to be therapy in the face of the looming realization that there isn’t enough therapy in the world that can fix what is really broken. Needless to say, this rant could fill volumes with example after example if I would let it. I find the process of writing it frustrating, tedious, and probably pointless… especially given my gross inability to gracefully articulate my thoughts in light of the storm raging in my head. Exactly what is therapeutic about that I’m not sure, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

We are all taught as children that without laws there would be no society, only anarchy. Sadly, starting at early ages we in this country have been brainwashed to believe that, in return for our dedication and service, our government stands for justice for all. We are further brainwashed to believe that there is freedom in this place, and that we should be ready to lay our lives down for the noble principals represented by its founding fathers. Remember? One of these was “no taxation without representation”. I have spent the total years of my adulthood unlearning that crap from only a few years of my childhood. These days anyone who really stands up for that principal is promptly labeled a “crackpot”, traitor and worse.
While very few working people would say they haven’t had their fair share of taxes (as can I), in my lifetime I can say with a great degree of certainty that there has never been a politician cast a vote on any matter with the likes of me or my interests in mind. Nor, for that matter, are they the least bit interested in me or anything I have to say.

Why is it that a handful of thugs and plunderers can commit unthinkable atrocities (and in the case of the GM executives, for scores of years) and when it’s time for their gravy train to crash under the weight of their gluttony and overwhelming stupidity, the force of the full federal government has no difficulty coming to their aid within days if not hours? Yet at the same time, the joke we call the American medical system, including the drug and insurance companies, are murdering tens of thousands of people a year and stealing from the corpses and victims they cripple, and this country’s leaders don’t see this as important as bailing out a few of their vile, rich cronies. Yet, the political “representatives” (thieves, liars, and self-serving scumbags is far more accurate) have endless time to sit around for year after year and debate the state of the “terrible health care problem”. It’s clear they see no crisis as long as the dead people don’t get in the way of their corporate profits rolling in.

And justice? You’ve got to be kidding!

How can any rational individual explain that white elephant conundrum in the middle of our tax system and, indeed, our entire legal system? Here we have a system that is, by far, too complicated for the brightest of the master scholars to understand. Yet, it mercilessly “holds accountable” its victims, claiming that they’re responsible for fully complying with laws not even the experts understand. The law “requires” a signature on the bottom of a tax filing; yet no one can say truthfully that they understand what they are signing; if that’s not “duress” than what is. If this is not the measure of a totalitarian regime, nothing is.

How did I get here?

My introduction to the real American nightmare starts back in the early ‘80s. Unfortunately after more than 16 years of school, somewhere along the line I picked up the absurd, pompous notion that I could read and understand plain English. Some friends introduced me to a group of people who were having ‘tax code’ readings and discussions. In particular, zeroed in on a section relating to the wonderful “exemptions” that make institutions like the vulgar, corrupt Catholic Church so incredibly wealthy. We carefully studied the law (with the help of some of the “best”, high-paid, experienced tax lawyers in the business), and then began to do exactly what the “big boys” were doing (except that we weren’t steeling from our congregation or lying to the government about our massive profits in the name of God). We took a great deal of care to make it all visible, following all of the rules, exactly the way the law said it was to be done.

The intent of this exercise and our efforts was to bring about a much-needed re-evaluation of the laws that allow the monsters of organized religion to make such a mockery of people who earn an honest living. However, this is where I learned that there are two “interpretations” for every law; one for the very rich, and one for the rest of us… Oh, and the monsters are the very ones making and enforcing the laws; the inquisition is still alive and well today in this country.

That little lesson in patriotism cost me $40,000+, 10 years of my life, and set my retirement plans back to 0. It made me realize for the first time that I live in a country with an ideology that is based on a total and complete lie. It also made me realize, not only how naive I had been, but also the incredible stupidity of the American public; that they buy, hook, line, and sinker, the crap about their “freedom”… and that they continue to do so with eyes closed in the face of overwhelming evidence and all that keeps happening in front of them.

Before even having to make a shaky recovery from the sting of the first lesson on what justice really means in this country (around 1984 after making my way through engineering school and still another five years of “paying my dues”), I felt I finally had to take a chance of launching my dream of becoming an independent engineer.
On the subjects of engineers and dreams of independence, I should digress somewhat to say that I’m sure that I inherited the fascination for creative problem solving from my father. I realized this at a very young age.

The significance of independence, however, came much later during my early years of college; at the age of 18 or 19 when I was living on my own as student in an apartment in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. My neighbor was an elderly retired woman (80+ seemed ancient to me at that age) who was the widowed wife of a retired steel worker. Her husband had worked all his life in the steel mills of central Pennsylvania with promises from big business and the union that, for his 30 years of service, he would have a pension and medical care to look forward to in his retirement. Instead he was one of the thousands who got nothing because the incompetent mill management and corrupt union (not to mention the government) raided their pension funds and stole their retirement. All she had was social security to live on.
In retrospect, the situation was laughable because here I was living on peanut butter and bread (or Ritz crackers when I could afford to splurge) for months at a time. When I got to know this poor figure and heard her story I felt worse for her plight than for my own (I, after all, I thought I had everything to in front of me). I was genuinely appalled at one point, as we exchanged stories and commiserated with each other over our situations, when she in her grandmotherly fashion tried to convince me that I would be “healthier” eating cat food (like her) rather than trying to get all my substance from peanut butter and bread. I couldn’t quite go there, but the impression was made. I decided that I didn’t trust big business to take care of me, and that I would take responsibility for my own future and myself.

Return to the early ‘80s, and here I was off to a terrifying start as a ‘wet-behind-the-ears’ contract software engineer... and two years later, thanks to the fine backroom, midnight effort by the sleazy executives of Arthur Andersen (the very same folks who later brought us Enron and other such calamities) and an equally sleazy New York Senator (Patrick Moynihan), we saw the passage of 1986 tax reform act with its section 1706.

For you who are unfamiliar, here is the core text of the IRS Section 1706, defining the treatment of workers (such as contract engineers) for tax purposes.

Visit this link for a conference committee report (http://www.synergistech.com/1706.shtml#ConferenceCommitteeReport) regarding the intended interpretation of Section 1706 and the relevant parts of Section 530, as amended.

For information on how these laws affect technical services workers and their clients, read our discussion here (http://www.synergistech.com/ic-taxlaw.shtml).

SEC. 1706. TREATMENT OF CERTAIN TECHNICAL PERSONNEL.

(a) IN GENERAL - Section 530 of the Revenue Act of 1978 is amended by adding at the end thereof the following new subsection:

(d) EXCEPTION. - This section shall not apply in the case of an individual who pursuant to an arrangement between the taxpayer and another person, provides services for such other person as an engineer, designer, drafter, computer programmer, systems analyst, or other similarly skilled worker engaged in a similar line of work.

(b) EFFECTIVE DATE. - The amendment made by this section shall apply to remuneration paid and services rendered after December 31, 1986.

Note:
·      "another person" is the client in the traditional job-shop relationship.
·      "taxpayer" is the recruiter, broker, agency, or job shop.
·      "individual", "employee", or "worker" is you.

Admittedly, you need to read the treatment to understand what it is saying but it’s not very complicated. The bottom line is that they may as well have put my name right in the text of section (d). Moreover, they could only have been more blunt if they would have came out and directly declared me a criminal and non-citizen slave. Twenty years later, I still can’t believe my eyes.

During 1987, I spent close to $5000 of my ‘pocket change’, and at least 1000 hours of my time writing, printing, and mailing to any senator, congressman, governor, or slug that might listen; none did, and they universally treated me as if I was wasting their time. I spent countless hours on the L.A. freeways driving to meetings and any and all of the disorganized professional groups who were attempting to mount a campaign against this atrocity. This, only to discover that our efforts were being easily derailed by a few moles from the brokers who were just beginning to enjoy the windfall from the new declaration of their “freedom”. Oh, and don’t forget, for all of the time I was spending on this, I was loosing income that I couldn’t bill clients.

After months of struggling it had clearly gotten to be a futile exercise. The best we could get for all of our trouble is a pronouncement from an IRS mouthpiece that they weren’t going to enforce that provision (read harass engineers and scientists). This immediately proved to be a lie, and the mere existence of the regulation began to have its impact on my bottom line; this, of course, was the intended effect.

Again, rewind my retirement plans back to 0 and shift them into idle. If I had any sense, I clearly should have left abandoned engineering and never looked back.
Instead I got busy working 100-hour workweeks. Then came the L.A. depression of the early 1990s. Our leaders decided that they didn’t need the all of those extra Air Force bases they had in Southern California, so they were closed; just like that. The result was economic devastation in the region that rivaled the widely publicized Texas S&L fiasco. However, because the government caused it, no one gave a shit about all of the young families who lost their homes or street after street of boarded up houses abandoned to the wealthy loan companies who received government funds to “shore up” their windfall. Again, I lost my retirement.

Years later, after weathering a divorce and the constant struggle trying to build some momentum with my business, I find myself once again beginning to finally pick up some speed. Then came the .COM bust and the 911 nightmare. Our leaders decided that all aircraft were grounded for what seemed like an eternity; and long after that, ‘special’ facilities like San Francisco were on security alert for months. This made access to my customers prohibitively expensive. Ironically, after what they had done the Government came to the aid of the airlines with billions of our tax dollars … as usual they left me to rot and die while they bailed out their rich, incompetent cronies WITH MY MONEY! After these events, there went my business but not quite yet all of my retirement and savings.

By this time, I’m thinking that it might be good for a change. Bye to California, I’ll try Austin for a while. So I moved, only to find out that this is a place with a highly inflated sense of self-importance and where damn little real engineering work is done. I’ve never experienced such a hard time finding work. The rates are 1/3 of what I was earning before the crash, because pay rates here are fixed by the three or four large companies in the area who are in collusion to drive down prices and wages… and this happens because the justice department is all on the take and doesn’t give a fuck about serving anyone or anything but themselves and their rich buddies.

To survive, I was forced to cannibalize my savings and retirement, the last of which was a small IRA. This came in a year with mammoth expenses and not a single dollar of income. I filed no return that year thinking that because I didn’t have any income there was no need. The sleazy government decided that they disagreed. But they didn’t notify me in time for me to launch a legal objection so when I attempted to get a protest filed with the court I was told I was no longer entitled to due process because the time to file ran out. Bend over for another $10,000 helping of justice.
So now we come to the present. After my experience with the CPA world, following the business crash I swore that I’d never enter another accountant’s office again. But here I am with a new marriage and a boatload of undocumented income, not to mention an expensive new business asset, a piano, which I had no idea how to handle. After considerable thought I decided that it would be irresponsible NOT to get professional help; a very big mistake.

When we received the forms back I was very optimistic that they were in order. I had taken all of the years information to Bill Ross, and he came back with results very similar to what I was expecting. Except that he had neglected to include the contents of Sheryl’s unreported income; $12,700 worth of it. To make matters worse, Ross knew all along this was missing and I didn’t have a clue until he pointed it out in the middle of the audit. By that time it had become brutally evident that he was representing himself and not me.

This left me stuck in the middle of this disaster trying to defend transactions that have no relationship to anything tax-related (at least the tax-related transactions were poorly documented). Things I never knew anything about and things my wife had no clue would ever matter to anyone. The end result is… well, just look around.

I remember reading about the stock market crash before the “great” depression and how there were wealthy bankers and businessmen jumping out of windows when they realized they screwed up and lost everything. Isn’t it ironic how far we’ve come in 60 years in this country that they now know how to fix that little economic problem; they just steal from the middle class (who doesn’t have any say in it, elections are a joke) to cover their asses and it’s “business-as-usual”. Now when the wealthy fuck up, the poor get to die for the mistakes… isn’t that a clever, tidy solution.

As government agencies go, the FAA is often justifiably referred to as a tombstone agency, though they are hardly alone. The recent presidential puppet GW Bush and his cronies in their eight years certainly reinforced for all of us that this criticism rings equally true for all of the government. Nothing changes unless there is a body count (unless it is in the interest of the wealthy sows at the government trough). In a government full of hypocrites from top to bottom, life is as cheap as their lies and their self-serving laws.

I know I’m hardly the first one to decide I have had all I can stand. It has always been a myth that people have stopped dying for their freedom in this country, and it isn’t limited to the blacks, and poor immigrants. I know there have been countless before me and there are sure to be as many after. But I also know that by not adding my body to the count, I insure nothing will change. I choose to not keep looking over my shoulder at “big brother” while he strips my carcass, I choose not to ignore what is going on all around me, I choose not to pretend that business as usual won’t continue; I have just had enough.

I can only hope that the numbers quickly get too big to be white washed and ignored that the American zombies wake up and revolt; it will take nothing less. I would only hope that by striking a nerve that stimulates the inevitable double standard, knee-jerk government reaction that results in more stupid draconian restrictions people wake up and begin to see the pompous political thugs and their mindless minions for what they are. Sadly, though I spent my entire life trying to believe it wasn’t so, but violence not only is the answer, it is the only answer. The cruel joke is that the really big chunks of shit at the top have known this all along and have been laughing, at and using this awareness against, fools like me all along.
I saw it written once that the definition of insanity is repeating the same process over and over and expecting the outcome to suddenly be different. I am finally ready to stop this insanity. Well, Mr. Big Brother IRS man, let’s try something different; take my pound of flesh and sleep well.

The communist creed: From each according to his ability, to each according to his need.

The capitalist creed: From each according to his gullibility, to each according to his greed.

Joe Stack (1956-2010)
02/18/2010

Who knew blue denim could throw your life into such turmoil!?

2010-02-18T10:16:00.006-07:00

No, it's nothing major... just... well... how do I say...

I feel guilty when I wear jeans.

Yup. I said it.

So here's the story. About 10 years ago I started my transition from hippie, Indigo Girls lovin', free-form Friday night services followed by going out for ice cream Judaism that was mainly focused on social action (aka Reform) to a skirt wearing, long sleeves in the summer, Baruch Hashem sayin', Kosher keepin', shomer negiah, shomer shabbis, "Flipping Out" "Baal Teshuvah." (Though I slightly object to being called a Baal Teshuvah. I have always been a religious Jew but my observance has just been different... like wearing tzitzit and a kippah and laying teffilin... In fact, I started a group called Frum From Nifty because there are so many former Reform kids goin' Ortho these days!)

So I went from one end to the other... then I found my way to a middle ground where I felt comfortable with a foot in both worlds. I understand the WHY of why we do certain things and make (Torah) educated decisions in how I live my life.

<--- To the left = tznius To the right = not tznius --->

What does that mean? Well, it kinda means that I have my own Talia sect of Judaism. I am fairly sure no one else out there is just like me in my observance and that makes life hard. I am just as comfortable on the streets of Crown Heights as Denver. I'll drive on Saturdays but I try not to spend money. I (try to) davven every morning and evening and say my brachot over food and drink... okay, I'll admit there have been many shehakols tossed in over the last bite as I kick myself for forgetting. Clearly, I am far too "religious" (really, I prefer the word observant) for the Reformies and not quite there yet for my Chabad family of friends. Anyway... this is starting to get long winded for a blog. :)

So here is my dilemma... I found the ideas and ideals of tzniut fascinating. I did the full on long sleeves, long (not so fashionable) skirts, high necks, etc for about two years until I realized that while it had helped me rediscover my femininity, break the jeans cycle (you know what I am talking about... nothin' but jeans because they are comfy and easy), and realize that I can dress for myself and not for anyone else... the severely restricted nature of the 'uniform' I adopted was certainly not me. SO, I decided to keep the skirts in the wardrobe but not deny myself the joy of jeans. However, I would still dress in a modest fashion even while wearing pants. Not kidding, folks, this took me years to figure out...

So, fast forward through the awkward parts, today I wear skirts (modest skirts - knee length or longer) at least five days a week. Allowing for the need to feel a good fitting pair of jeans on myself once or twice. The added impetus for this is that I live in Colorado. Don't know if you know this but... uhm... it snows here... and gets cold... a breeze up a skirt (even with tights) ain't fun in 3 degree weather. Today is one of those days. I mean it isn't 3 degrees but it is forecast to snow and be kinda crummy and I am just going to the gym, work, home, and doctor's appointment... damn you rationalization!!! Point is, sometimes it feels more high maintenance to wear a skirt. I have shoes that look great under pants that I can't wear with a skirt. Even a long jean one. Anywho... I've noticed, increasingly, as I wear my pants the few days a month that I do, I have more and more quilt about it.

I mean, I have friends in Crown Heights (aka the worldwide headquarters of Chabad) that wear skirts rain or shine, snow, sleet, hurricane, blizzard... why do I have such an issue? Well clearly, they were raised that this was the thing to do and pants aren't really an option. Not me... my mom STILL to this day remarks when I wear a skirt, "Oh, you're wearing a long skirt, huh?" or "You look so Frummy." And I used to get defensive... like I didn't want anyone to notice that THAT was exactly what I was going for. But now, now I just say, "Yup, I do. Thanks." :)

Another point of contention with my mom (who was raised in the Conservative movement) is that I want to cover my hair when I get married. We haven't had the convo outright but I know she doesn't love the idea BUT she is happy when I am happy. On one hand it gets to be an outward sign of your Judaism but on the other hand, it truly is something you do for yourself... like the laws of taharat mishpacha which I find essential.

I think it is through education and really understanding the laws and traditions and making up your own mind that helps you stick to your choices. And this jeans thing, I think I'm just being a wuss... either throw out the jeans or suck it up and embrace my decision... yes, I know, I answered my own question.

Check out my blog at Patheos.com - AshkanOrthoNewalForm-ish

An Open Love Letter

2010-02-17T14:12:00.000-07:00

A friend/colleague/partner in Jewish fun crime wrote this open love letter.

http://bit.ly/BeMineDD

It is just so sweet. I think we spend so much of our time worrying about control that we forget to let go...

I really hope he does find his beshert soon. He certainly deserves it!

Brotherhood Postponed

2010-01-28T16:11:00.001-07:00

This is the sermon my grandfather (ZT”L) wrote after he marched with Martin Luther King from Selma, Alabama. Being MLK day, I thought it was appropriate and you might enjoy reading it!

-Talia

Brotherhood Postponed ©

The March from Selma, Alabama

Sunday, March 21, 1965

Indianapolis, Indiana
March 26, 1965
Rabbi Maurice Davis

Rabbi Maurice Davis in his office

My dear friends, it was precisely one month ago tonight, the 26th of February, that we had chosen for the event, which takes place this evening. We called it a “Bring-Your-Neighbor” Sabbath. The thought behind it was to break through the formalism of group and category, and meet, rather, on a person-to-person basis.

Our members would participate personally, informally. They would invite friends – or neighbors (hopefully overlapping categories!) to share the Sabbath with us. And I would preach on some nebulous subject having to do with brotherhood, for that is the custom we Americans observe during the third week of the second month of the year.

Well, the snows came, and brotherhood week was postponed. Now, a month later we meet for the program scheduled for February 26. I realize that it is a dangerous practice, perhaps even subversive, to talk about brotherhood in March. It is the kind of un-American activity that could lead to a breakdown in our entire national way of life. Someone may begin to love his mother on a day other than the second Sunday in May or eat turkey on a day other than the fourth Thursday in November, or worship G-d on a day other than the Sabbath. I suppose, however, that these fears of mine are unrealistic, and I should renew my faith that we shall once again return to normalcy.

I cannot recall what it was I planned to say last month. Too many events have happened too rapidly and too enormously in the past two weeks. Whatever it was that I might have said would be tonight something less than relevant. During the past week alone we sent two men into space where they guided their ship, changed their course and their orbit, circled the earth three times, and then apologized for landing 60 miles away from their target. During the past week alone we watched live television shots of the moon as Ranger 9 plunged into that increasingly abused star at the precise area planned for impact. And, during the past week, we witnessed in Alabama a scene more stirring, more filled with signs and portents for our world than any of our engineering feats of science.

Last month, when the snows came, I jokingly announced that I would speak tonight on the subject, “Brotherhood Postponed.” All I had in mind was the snow, but that was a month ago. Last week I announced from this pulpit that I would go to Selma, Alabama, and it was there that I witnessed the results of “Brotherhood Postponed” in a way I never before quite fully comprehended. I should like to talk to you this evening about that trip. It would make the title “Brotherhood Postponed” more accurate than I had planned for it to be. I should like to talk to you this evening about Alabama for many reasons. First of all I speak in the name of a great many rabbis and ministers and priests, members of whose various religions are present here this evening.

Your ministers, and your priests were there in Alabama. If not your own particular clergyman, his colleagues were. And those that went were not more noble than those who stayed at home. They just were luckier. In the life of a clergyman his first responsibility is to his congregation, and there are many events that should and must take precedence. There are commitments that would have kept anyone of us at home.

I was fortunate to have had no such crucial commitments for Sunday, March 21. David Goldstein accompanied me, and we flew to Atlanta on Saturday night. We spent the evening there, and Sunday at 7:00am we flew to Montgomery. It was a flight filled with clergymen. Rabbis, and ministers, and priests took almost every seat. Seated next to me were Rabbi Wolf Kelman, and Rabbi Abraham Heschel, both of the Conservative movement, the latter a former professor of mine at the Hebrew Union College. At Montgomery we were met by Brant Coopersmith of the American Jewish Committee, and a Negro physician from Birmingham, Dr. Upshaw, who drove us to Selma.

Dr. Upshaw drove very carefully. It is not wise for a Negro to speed on the highways of Alabama. As we approached Selma we saw the Army begin to position itself. Jeeps and trucks filled with soldiers, hospital units, and communications experts clustered along the way. Arriving in Selma, we headed for Browns Chapel Methodist Church where services would take place. The road leading to the Church was lined with National Guardsmen, recently federalized. As we turned into that road, six of them stepped out in front of our car holding their rifles in a position of readiness. One approached the car, stared in at us, but said never a word. In a very polite and subdued voice Dr. Upshaw asked, “How does one get to that church?” The guardsman turned his back on us, waved a hand to those that blocked the way, and we drove through.

It was 8 o’clock in the morning. Services were scheduled for 11:00am. On the steps of the church and in the streets were a thousand people already waiting. From 8:00 until 11:00 they kept streaming in, with never a pause. Many of the people there were friends of mine from other cities and other states. A holiday mood was in the air. From the stone steps if the church various people went to the microphone, and took turns leading the group in song.

They sang such songs as:

“Freedom, O freedom, O freedom over me!
And before I’ll be a slave
I’ll be buried in my grave,
And go home to my Lord, and be free.
We shall overcome. We shall overcome.
We shall overcome some day.
Deep in my heart I do believe
We shall overcome some day!”

There were other songs of less somber note such as:

“I love Governor Wallace in my heart.”

After a while I left with some of my friends to visit the Negro homes in the neighborhood where they had stayed the past few nights. One rabbi said to me, “You can’t buy any food in the Negro neighborhood in Selma. You can’t buy it, because they give it to you. You can’t pay for lodging, because they give it to you.” Tiny houses had opened wide in wondrous hospitality.

An elderly Negro lady and her grandchild approached me to say, “In all my life I never dreamed that such a day as this could be!” I talked to a Negro teen-aged girl, and asker her if she planned to march. She shook her head no. I asked her if she resented our being there. She shook her head no. I asked her if she thought any good would come of this. She said. “Maybe, but after you leave they’ll still call me the same names they called me before you came.”

We returned to the church, and I noticed that all the Reform rabbis were wearing yarmelkes. When I questioned this, I was told, “It is our answer to the clerical collar.” Clergymen of every denomination, from Roman Catholicism to Unitarianism were wearing clerical collars to show they were clergymen. Rabbis of all branches of Judaism were wearing yarmelkes.

I tried to get one, but I could not. I learned later that they sent back for a thousand yarmelkes but all the Civil Rights workers wanted to wear them. Negro children and white marchers were all sporting yarmelkes.

The five Rabbis who had been jailed on Friday had held services in prison. When they were released they announced that on Saturday night they would hold a Havdallah service and were given the use of Browns Chapel. When they arrived there on Saturday night they found 600 people waiting. Negroes and white, Catholics, Protestants, and Jews were waiting for that religious service which marked the close of the Jewish Sabbath. That is where all the yarmelkes went!

About 10:15 in the morning the Reverend Martin Luther King, and his assistants, Reverend Young and Reverend Abernathy, climbed the steps of the church. Beyond the steps the entrance to the church was cleared except for dignitaries. Rabbi Raiskin of California asked if I would represent the U.A.H.C. When I agreed, two men lifted me up by my arms above the lecturn with its many microphones, and literally pulled me up to the platform. I chatted briefly with Reverend King, and the service began.

It was a deeply moving, deeply religious, and totally non-sectarian service. Rabbi Heschel read from our Bible, a Protestant minister read from the New Testament, and a Catholic Priest offered a beautifully moving prayer. Then Reverend King began again to weave his magic spell. Nothing but the word “magic” can quite describe what it is he does to so many. When King speaks, you are not an audience. You are participants. And when he finished we were ready to march.

Reverend Abernathy announced the order of the march. The several thousand people would march in rows of 8, and the first three rows would be lead by men and women chosen by Martin Luther King. He read off the names, and I was thrilled to hear my name called out as one of the leaders.

We twenty-four entered the chapel, were given our assignments, and then marched out. On the street we formed three rows of 8, locked our arms together, and started to march. Behind us the thousands began to follow. In front of us the television camera men, the news photographers, and the reporters walked backwards, facing King, and trying to press in on him. Finally 12 workers locked arms in front of the first row to keep King from getting crushed.

We came to the bridge which had marked the terminal point of two previous attempts. On one of those attempts, King had turned his people back at this spot. On the other attempt, the state troopers had ridden into the crowd with clubs, and bullwhips, and tear gas. We paused there a moment, just to remember, and then we moved out on the highway. It was a divided highway, and the North side was reserved for us. Every few yards a soldier stood with a rifle and bayonet. Army cars drove ahead of us and behind us. In the air five helicopters circled endlessly, occasionally swooping down just above a clump of trees or bushes. Radios and walkie-talkies crackled orders back and forth. State troopers drove by in squad cars, two to a car. One drove, and the other quite ostentatiously took pictures of the marches. This is an Alabama form of intimidation. I kept remembering that these were the same state troopers who had two weeks earlier had ridden mercilessly into a defenseless mass of people! I marveled again at the power of the federal government whose presence stood between us and another massacre.

We kept on marching; on my left a Catholic Priest from San Antonio, on my right, a young girl from the staff of Southern Christian Leadership Conference. In the first row were King, Abernathy, and Young, Ralph Bunche, whose doctor had ordered him not to march, Abraham Heschel, whose white flowing beard stood out in contrast, and Deaconess Phyllis Edwards of the Episcopal Diocese of California.

Along the road were groups of people standing. Negroes waved, wept, prayed, and shouted out words of encouragement. There were whites who taunted, jeered, cursed. Other whites just stood with stark amazement at this incredible site, for which they could find neither rhyme nor reason. On the other side of the divided highway there was a parked car, a Volkswagon, painted with many signs. Six of us broke rank, and went over to the car. The signs were signs of hatred and of filth, taunting even the death of Reverend Reed. We stood there taking pictures while those inside glared and cursed.

Sown the road a bit the scene was repeated. We passed a charming white house, on the lawn of which a kindly matronly white woman sat with her children and grandchildren. It was the picture one associates with the story-book South. And on the side of her house were signs which read, “Dirty communist clergy go home,” and “Integrationist scum stay away!” The contrast was shocking, but the people who marched were merely amused. “Somebody tell her,” one of the marchers said, “We hadn’t planned to stop there in the first place.”

There had been much singing at the church, but on the highway there was very little. One of the reasons might have been that the rows stretched out in endless array. More significant, however, was that our thoughts had turned inward. Everyone seemed to be asking his neighbor two questions, “What are you thinking?” and “What do you think they are thinking?”

Some of them were dressed as beatniks, some were dressed as day laborers, some were dressed in the vestments of the church, and most were dressed in their Sunday best. A seven year old boy joined my line. I asked him, “What are you doing?” He said, “Marching.” I asked him, “Why are you marching?” He looked up at me and said, “For my freedom.”

After about five miles, we took a 10-minute break. I used that time to go back through the crowds for pictures, and then the march continued. At one point I left the march entirely, and stood on the divider strip. I thought to take movies of the entire group as it passed me by. I could not. The film ran out long before the lines did. But standing there almost as if in review, I saw the enormity of it all. I saw friends I hadn’t seen for years. I saw strangers who were no longer strangers. I saw a group from Hawaii who had travelled 5000 miles just to march. They carried a banner that said, “Hawaii Knows Integration Works!” I saw a man with one leg. His right leg had been amputated at the knee, but he marched right along with the rest on crutches. I ran back to catch up with my line at the front. Finally after about 13 miles, and about 5 ½ hours of marching we approached the camp site. The helicopters hovered a few feet above our heads in stationary position. The road was lines with people who cheered and waved, and there were tears in the eyes of many.

Once we stopped at the camp site several things began to occur to me. The first was that I had neither eaten nor drunk anything for more than twelve hours. I had not even sat down once in those twelve hours. My left foot had blistered painfully. And I had experienced a religious exaltation which I had never witnessed before.

An hour later we were in a car headed for Montgomery. Only 300 were permitted to remain. We prayed for their safety, we hoped for the best, and we feared the worst.
That night instead of returning to Atlanta, I got on a chartered plane to Cincinnati where my father-in-law lay ill in the hospital. I arrived there at midnight, and spent what was left of that night with him and my mother-in-law. At 7:00 A.M. I flew into Indianapolis.

Reporters and television men interviewed me most of Monday. Monday night my life was threatened. Not in Selma. Not in Montgomery. Not in Atlanta. In Indianapolis. Protective measures has to be taken for my children, and my home. On Tuesday night the phone began to ring at 2:00 A.M. Each time I answered it, I was greeted with silence, until I took the phone off the hook and fell asleep. Some of the mail I have received is filled with unbelievable filth, ugly statements, and – interestingly enough – disclosing knowledge about my life, including my previous pulpit in Lexington, Kentucky.

Some of the letters I have received are beautiful beyond the power of words to describe, and some of the phone calls have been so moving that they brought tears to my eyes.

Brotherhood postponed. Dear friends, brotherhood has been postponed for a very long time. Not by the coldness of the weather, but by the coldness of the heart. The task of religion, your religion and mine, is to practice brotherhood, not talk about it.
People keep asking me why I decided to go to Alabama. I’m not sure that even now I know the answer. I think I went to Alabama to worship God! I know that is what I did on U.S. Highway 80, along with 6,000 men and women, boys and girls, each of whom in his own way was doing the same thing.

Last night we learned that one of us had been murdered on that highway. I think all of us died a little bit at the news. This morning the President announced that four members of the Ku Klux Klan had been arrested, and he added these words: “If Klansmen hear my voice today, let it be both an appeal – and a warning – to get out of the Klan now, and return to a decent society – before it is too late!”

Brotherhood postponed. The time has come, and it has been a long time in coming. The time has come to worship with our lives as with our lips, in the streets as in the sanctuaries. And we who dare to call God, God, must begin to learn the challenge which that word contains.

“One God over all” has to mean “One brotherhood over all.” And I know a bunch of anonymous people for whom it means precisely that. Brotherhood postponed does not mean brotherhood destroyed. It is for us to see that it never, never does! Amen.

Rabbi Maurice Davis with his wife, sons, daughter-in-law, and first grandchild (me!)

Bathroom Habits... RESULTS!

2010-01-22T11:21:00.002-07:00

Thanks to everyone who took my bathroom habits survey. I was bummed that I didn't get more of a response but here is the data...

Demographics -
54 respondents

70% were women
30% were men

76% were between 19 - 29
22% were between 30 - 39
2% were between 40 - 49

40% from the Southeast
35% from the Central US (Colorado, Kansas, etc)
11% from the Southwest
7% from the Northeast
4% from the Mid-west
4% from the Northwest

Bathroom habits -
When asked what stall you go to, it was an even split between the first, middle, and last, as well as other. Some responses were -
"Disabled/handicap stall"
"Closest one to a solid wall"
"At least one away from other people"
"The one where the door swings out"
and the best of the group - "There are elaborate man rules about this"

When asked about a bathroom you frequent (i.e. work) a trend did emerge. 69% of respondents always tried to use the same stall every time. As one person put it, "there's no place like home."

This survey also dispelled a rumor about stall selection when others are in the bathroom. There was a pretty even split here too.
39% said they skipped one stall
33% said "who cares, I have to pee!"
28% said they pick the furthest from being occupied.
Responses? "Cleanest always wins!" "I'm a guy, so it all depends. #1, skip a stall. #2, find another bathroom or wait until later. I'm not pooping next to anyone."

The next question asked for their response on the question "why do you pick the stall you pick."

"Handicap stalls usually have more room to maneuver, are more private, and have taller toilets"
"i pick the ones with the best doors"
"I've heard that people tend to use the middle or last stalls most often; therefore, the first stall is usually cleaner. Also, I've noticed that people usually don't go for the first stall, so it's kind of like an act of bravery to go into the first one."
"Don't want to be too close to 'my neighbor's' sound effects :)"
"I've always thought (for no rational reason) that the ones closest to the door are the least used....so I use those"
"It's a combination of I feel tall at the little urinal and I feel its always cleaner"
"Generally because somebody is always in the first stall, or the first stall is usually clogged. Odd but true."
And the ever useful - "Just cause"

We also asked - "Do you take longer to "finish up" if someone else is in the bathroom to avoid seeing people?"
46% said yes!
35% said no
and 20% said other
"Yes, at work, because there aren't separate staff stalls and I don't want to run into patrons."
and "It depends. Public restroom I take longer. A more familiar restroom (like work), I might try to finish sooner to see who it is I can talk to for a few minutes."

Lastly, I asked the age old question... did you wash your hands! :) I don't know that people were entirely honest but I hope so, because that means we have some clean people out there!!
57% said all the time
24% said 75% of the time
15% said 50% of the time
4% said 25% of the time
and no one said never... whew!
Some responses -
"3 A.M. not so much -- too sleepy"
"sometimes at home I just do a quick pee and have to run. always in public because i have been near other people"
"Always in a public restroom"
"But I don't always use soap (I have very sensitive skin, so I can't use some of the cheap bathroom soaps without my hands turning bright red and itchy.) Sometimes I just rinse, dry and use hand sanitizer later."
"110%, and use a paper towel to open the door."
"Always when in public, rarely at home."
_____________________

Very interesting responses. It has showed me that we all have a lot of unsubstantiated ideas about the restroom and the first stall may not always be cleaner... since we all saw that news report that it is less used. :) And a lot of people don't wash their hands after going to the bathroom at home... interesting.

Thanks for playing along kids!

How Much is One Life Worth?

2009-12-24T12:47:00.000-07:00

Okay, close your eyes... wait, not really, you have to read this. Pretend to close your eyes.

Imagine it is WWII. The German's captured a soldier on night. Just snatched him over the border. The next day there are cries for his release. But the Germans won't even talk about releasing him until the American's release 1000 prisoners. Not prisoners of war, Germans who came to America and committed a crime or multiple crimes that got them put in jail. Well... we can't let a poor American boy languish in prison in Germany... so we release those prisoners and wait for more instructions. Well that wasn't enough. Now for one man's life, we must release 1000 more criminals.This kid didn't break any rules of war, he just happened to be in a place where he could get grabbed. The American public starts to wonder... why are we releasing these criminals back into society so they can commit crimes against us again? For one kid? What is his life worth?

This situation is actually happening right now... it has been going on but change the word German to Hamas/Palestinian and the American boy is really, then 19 year old, Gilad Shalit, an Israeli soldier (in the middle of his mandatory draft service). And he has been in custody for 1278 days (and at the time I am typing this... 17 hours, 30 min, and 2 seconds). And Hamas demands something new everyday. We have to release thousands of prisoners, who were captured jumping the border, attempting to bomb Israel, or other crimes to appease these Palestinian captors. And yet, all we get in return is a video of a sickly, thin, young man who misses his parents and his home.

WHERE ON EARTH WOULD ANYONE ELSE DO THIS?! In America, we would not have fought for that one person. Not that, in America, we place any less value on life but we aren't tormented by terrorists in America. These terrorists know we want peace, that we want our people to be safe... and they exploit that... and no one stops them. And yet they are still the poor underdog. While I will not claim that the Israelis are completely innocent, I think the actions on the part of the Palestinians are often white washed.

Anyway, I am just disturbed at the amount the Israelis are giving up for this boy. And while I want him to be released to go home, I don't know how much I am willing to give up to do that... And by I and we... I am referring to my spiritual homeland... Israel.

This blog is written by a mother of an Israeli soldier. She is very brave to be able to articulate this difficult position.
A Soldier's Mother

(originally posted to my blog at Patheos)

Kosher Candy

2009-12-24T11:08:00.003-07:00

One of my biggest challenges as a person who keeps kosher is finding kosher candy. Seriously! It's not something you think about. I mean, what are the chances that your chocolate candy bar has bacon in it or cheese and turkey? Okay... I guess I can't really say that anymore because people are making bacon candy bars... (couldn't they have found a better picture of bacon? I mean that doesn't even look good!)

But back on track here... the reason we need to look for a hecksher on a candy bar is usually because of the gelatin. I had a reality check many years ago. It was horrible... People always ask me, "Have you EVER eaten something that isn't kosher?" And my answer is, I am sure I have inadvertently but I have been keeping kosher since I seven and strict since 17. My reality check was a mistake. I love gummy bears. I really, really, do... certain flavors mind you (why do they always put more of the crappy flavors in the bags?) but I just love them. They are my second favorite candy. Well, Haribo makes insanely good gummy bears. They are just soft enough and taste yummy. Not too big or too small. Just perfect. One day I was having a chat with a vegan friend who mentioned that I should check the gummy in the gummy bears... uh oh, I thought. I hadn't even considered the possibility. Well I mean who even uses pork gelatin these days... sure, no hecksher but...

AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I went to their website and sure enough, in their FAQ's this is what it said -

What type of gelatin does Haribo use?
Haribo products produced in Haribo's factory in Turkey are made with beef gelatin and are certified HALAL. All other items are made with pork gelatin.
Are Haribo products Kosher?
Haribo products are not kosher. There is however, a kosher line of Haribo sold exclusively through PASKESZ.

I nearly died... for several reasons.
#1. I LOVE these gummy bears!
#2. I had just bought a 5 POUND BAG! (remember... gummies are light... 5 pounds is a lot!)
#3. I had been eating them for about a year!
#4. I LOVE THESE GUMMY BEARS!
#5. ... the Paskesz version they mention, while just as good, cost about 300% more than regular. You can buy regular for $0.99 but the Kosher kind is usually just over $3

:( :( :( :(

So I vowed that day, never to eat candy without checking the hecksher again. No complacency. No more piggy gelatin. So I searched. You will be happy to hear, many of my favorite candies have a hecksher... including my #1 favorite, Good and Plenty. Yes. I love black licorice.

There is a great resource (though you have to be vigilant because these things can change at the drop of a hat) online. This company compiled the heckshers of all the candy they carry (which is most of it). Check it out here - Old Time Candy - Kosher

Use it wisely, friends!

(originally posted to my blog at Patheos)

Challah Baby

2009-12-20T11:09:00.002-07:00

So many jokes you could make with that one... in fact, a lot of my friends use the word challah like holla... cheesy I know. But I am talking about the mitzvah of taking challah and the magic it can do...

So, women were give three special mitzvot (commandments) -

Challah - separating a portion of the dough, saying the blessing, and burning it
Niddah - family purity... meaning you go to the mikvah monthly and stay separate from your husband during your period
Hadlakat Nerot - lighting the shabbis candles

But let's talk about challah here.

Basics first. When you are setting out to bake a true challah, you need to use at least 12-14 cups of flour. Many authorities say, in order to fulfill the mitzvah of challah and to be legitimate enough to separate, it needs to be about 5 pounds of dough. After you have gone through the long process of combining ingredients and kneading and waiting for it to rise and then punching it down and letting it rise again, you will separate a section of the challah out to be burned (see here for more info on that). This is technically the challah. At this point you will say - harai zeh Challah (this is challah) and then the blessing - “Blessed are you, adonai our G!d, who sanctified us with these commandments and commanded us to separate challah.” Then you shape your challah and put that small piece in the oven and burn it.

Why do we burn it? Because that piece, the one that is designated challah, was only to be eaten by the kohains (the priestly tribe) which was easy when the Holy Temple stood but... since it has been destroyed twice and not rebuilt, we can't give it to the kohain. SO we burn it so no one accidentally eats it.

Now on to the magical mystical side.

A friend who is dear to me has been struggling. To protect her privacy, we will call her D and her husband M. She has a beautiful daughter and a wonderful husband but they desperately want to have more children. She has struggled for over a year and a half to get pregnant again. I was fortunate enough to travel to Mexico with her and her family in January. She was deep in the midst of this struggle. She contacted the Chabad rebbitzin in Cancun about doing a mikvah in the ocean to help with her infertility. I was with her that night on the beach. It was so beautiful. Not really the weather, or the scenery... it was a blustery night and we were on a public section of the beach that was deserted but full of resorts. But what was beautiful was this mother's conviction to her unborn children. She swallowed her fears and went into the ocean with the rebbitzin (rabbi's wife). She dunked the requisite three times, said the blessing, and ran out of the cold water. I caught her with towels and we took a cab home. It was as if a calm had settle over both of us. And I prayed. I prayed that she could conceive and that her body would hold and nurture this child. Sadly, it did not work. She has, over the past year, had two losses.

I hadn't seen her in a while until the beginning of December. We were all getting together to celebrate the birth of beautiful twins. Our mutual friend, another Chabad rebbitzin, had just given birth to these miracle babies and it was fitting to see her again at this event. We caught up and I hugged her beautiful little girl. It was 6 days later that I got the plea.

"I am sending you this email because I think you may participate and because you may know others willing to participate. I am looking for at least 40 people to bake challah and to perform the mitzvah of separating challah during the 24 hour period between sundown Thursday, December 17 and sundown Friday, December 18.

There is a tradition and a belief that with the unified prayer of at least 40 people and performance of this mitzvah conception may be made possible. M & I have been trying to conceive for a year and a half. We have had two losses in the past year. It is said that if you “...pray on behalf of a friend with similar needs; Hashem answers you first," I have been baking challahs for a few years now and have seen the miracle of conception in many people. Today I am asking for your help."

First, how can you deny such a heartfelt plea? How could I deny this from a woman who I shared that beautiful mikvah with? How could I deny my family a delish challah? :)

But I needed to help find some more women. I found three more and the list topped out at 61 from all over the world. On this list were women who had NEVER met M & D. We all came together over a 24 hour period to bake challah, think about this family, and hope and pray for them.

My challah was a bit rushed. I had to get home from work and I was tired, I went to a friends house to have her daughters help me but they were grumpy and I was rushed, I used her kitchen-aid mixer (I WANT ONE!), got the dough together and then it had to rise... that took forever and we were all tired by the time it was ready so I took my dough home, threw it in the fridge with the intent to finish it the next day. Friday I got home from work, turned the oven on and took the dough out of the fridge to let it get to room temp... I'm running out of time! It's 5:30, dinner starts at 6:15... guests at my parents house, everyone is waiting for my challah... But I wouldn't rush it. I had to put every intention into the separation and the braiding. I couldn't cheat these challot. Baked and ready to go, I literally pulled a challah out of the oven, tossed it in a glass casserole dish, covered in foil, and dashed to my car. Steaming hot still, I pulled up to my parents' house at just after 7. They had JUST started shabbis! We hadn't gotten to the challah yet! What luck! Still hot from my oven, I put my challah on the plate next to the store bought one. It wasn't as pretty but it sure had a lot more love.
We did the motzi and dug in. A chorus of groans of enjoyment went up. It was delish! My father's tradition is to give the priestly benediction to everyone present. He calls it the holy huddle. We huddled, he gave us the blessing and then I told the 10-15 guests about the story behind the challah. I asked they keep D in their thoughts and intentions when they ate it. It was an amazing moment.

We don't know if our prayers or mitzvahs helped D get pregnant yet. We don't know anything other than 61 women who may not have baked challah that week, baked. We did something that wasn't easy, that took some of our time and we dedicated it to a friend, sister, cousin, stranger. We were unselfish for a minute.

And I don't believe that my challah separation was noticed by Hashem and Hashem wrote a sticky note to remind G!dself to make sure D got pregnant. But what I do believe is that in that 24 hour period, D was so loved, cherished, and hopefully realized that so many people out there are pulling for her and her family.

Maybe that's the kinda boost those eggies needed.

A great talk - On Challah and Mothers by Sarah Esther Crispe

(originally posted to my blog at Patheos)

CHECK OUT THE CHALLAH BABY UPDATE HERE!

Matisyahu... reinvented

2009-12-15T11:10:00.002-07:00

There is this great new interview with Matisyahu on PBS (look for the video below) and it is really a beautiful and public and relateable story about how his faith has evolved.

I think one thing that defines our generation is that we aren't satisfied with the status quo in our spirituality. And it isn't just Jews, I have seen this with my non-Jewish friends too, whether they are Muslims or Christians. Sometimes our parents are observant in faith and it can feel oppressive and so behind the times. Other people have parents who aren't observant or involved in any religion (often times you hear them say, I don't want to push this on my kids like it was pushed on me) and those kids just want to find spirituality or a community.

I think the moral of the whole story is that there isn't really any ONE right path. We all are as unique as can be and there for different paths work for different people. And our journey to those paths is as unique as we are.

I'd love to hear everyone's thoughts on their own path to their spirituality. I will share mine after these videos...

PBS Interview with Matisyahu Pt 1

PBS Interview with Matisyahu Pt 2

I was raised in a Reform Jewish home. My father, uncle, grandfather, and great-grandfather were/are all reform rabbis. I was active in the reform movement. I served on the NFTY-SE board (back when we were still changing over from being called SEFTY) as the Religious and Cultural VP. I thrived in my community. When my parents moved to Colorado and I went to college, I lost that community. I was searching for Jewish fulfilment and community. When I couldn't go to my own father's services any more (because he was in a different state), I found myself totally spriritually unfulfilled by the English reform services. I hated being "judged" when I walked into the sanctuary for what I was wearing or what I drove. I didn't feel sprirtually fulfilled... and then I went to Chabad. Over the past 10 years, my Jewish practice has evolved from far left to far right and now I have landed in the middle. I consider myself Orthodox, I prefer to wear a skirt and dress more modestly, I love going to Chabad services, and some of my closest friends are chasids.

So that was my evolution... what was/is yours?

(originally posted to my blog at Patheos)

Don't you DARE say Merry Christmas!

2009-12-11T11:11:00.001-07:00

Do you know what really grinds my gears? The Happy Holidays/ Merry Christmas debate.

Look you can say what you want, you have freedom of speech but that also means that I can say Happy Holidays or Happy Chanukkah to you. If you want the freedom to say Merry Christmas you can’t take away my freedom to say Happy Holidays.

I am not diminishing your holidays by saying Happy Holidays, I am just including other people in that statement like my fellow Jews who celebrate Chanukkah or African-Americans who celebrate Kwanza.

I just question how Christians would feel if we only said Happy Chanukkah? Wouldn’t that be marginalizing their holiday? Well isn’t it reasonable that by saying Merry Christmas you are marginalizing mine?

Hey if you know that person is Christian, say Merry Christmas but if you aren’t sure or you are making a public statement, why not say Happy Holidays? The last time I checked, America wasn’t a solely Christian country, Christianity wasn’t the national religion of the USA, and Christmas isn’t a national holiday (though Christmas Day is recognized as an official federal holiday).

And then we get to public displays of religion… You want a Christmas tree funded by the Federal or State government? Fine… but you don’t get to block a public Menorah. So Bill O'Reilly said in 2006 that a policy banning nativity scenes in NYC public schools was "anti-Christian". But banning menorahs isn’t anti-semitic? Or anti-Jew?

I don’t care if you call them Christmas trees when you sell them… I’m not buying one anyway… we don’t have Chanukkah bushes or a Christmas tree for fun. I have a menorah and I am proud of it. You can absolutely keep Santa and Christmas trees and Easter bunnies that lay eggs (yeah, still don’t get that one). You don’t have to call them winter things or spring holidays, that doesn’t fool me. I have my own traditions and holidays. I don’t want to feel included in Christmas, I just don’t want you to tell me I am anti-Christian if I say Happy Holidays. I am not marginalizing Christmas, I just am being inclusive and sensitive just in case the person I am talking to is Jewish or celebrates another holiday.

What about the retailers… what about them? So in their marketing they use holiday (well not any more since they have been susceptible to the right wing, Christian fanatical boycotts and petitions), cool then I actually look at what they are selling. When they use Christmas… then I don’t look because I assume it is all red and green and Santa Claus… So fine. If you want to alienate a portion of the population… well I guess you have to choose one. Either the insane, extremists of the Christian faith who are very good at fire and brimstone (it’s their bread and butter…) or the entirety of the country who don’t celebrate Christmas (Jews, Muslims, Athiests, etc)… perhaps placating the nasties is a good idea… less chance of violent threats than from the rest of us who are used to being ignored. But Target Corp might be onto something (full disclosure: I worked for Target for about 2 years… and I did say Happy Holidays when I was at a register). By including both Christmas and Chanukkah, you please a larger demographic in the US… hum, what a thought… pluralism. You can even use Christmas AND holiday AND maybe even Chanukkah! What?! No way!

So what happens if you are ringing me up at the grocery store or at Target and you greet me with Merry Christmas?

I say with a big smile on my face, as politely as possible, Happy Chanukkah.

Your face… is priceless.

I can't find the Target commercial I was talking about online but here is the newest GAP one and I think it's great! Clearly their products are for anyone who is buying and not just Christmas celebrators...

GAP Commercial

Whew! That feels better. Thanks for letting me get that out. :)

Check out my friend's blog (less of a rant) about straddling this line with his young daughter. Click here!

(originally posted to my blog at Patheos)

E-mail Streams

2009-12-10T14:16:00.000-07:00

I just got overwhelmed.

Literally.

I am just sitting here, minding my own business... eating my delish Mad Greens Salad (one request, cut your beets into rounds, not teeeny tiny diced bits) and working when I realized I had about 92 email or email like things to read. Communication overload!

At work, I generally have open:
My personal email
My work email
My Facebook page
My work's Facebook page
My website
My Twitter page (or my work one)
My Skype
AND my iPhone next to me

And every venue of communication has some group of people whom I don't talk to any other way. Most of my Facebook friends aren't on Twitter, my Tweeps only know me through Twitter, my family and Gamma Phi email me on the personal email, work emails go to Patheos, work people Skype me... Not to mention the text messages...

It's one giant cluster! Some days I feel like all I do is check email in one form or another. And with Twitter's new functionality where they let you know how many tweets have come in since the last time you refeshed, I am getting mega anxiety! What the hell? Now I have to feel guilty for not staring at twitter and constantly refreshing? Then every time I refresh my Facebook or post something new to the work one, there is a new message! I barely get them cleared before they start piling up again.

Now, here is the really screwed up part. I am totally overwhelmed with communication today but if I don't have a Facebook message or Twitter @reply or email from a human being tomorrow... I will feel neglected.

Why G-d? Why? Why have I been afflicted with this e-twitterbook disease?!

I don't have an answer but I do know this... it is these days, these weeks, that make me enjoy my Shabbis so much more. Sleep in, no alarm, no email or phone... just relax.

Ahhhhh visions of shabbis dancing in my head. Thanks for the vent...

Bathroom Habits...

2009-11-04T11:06:00.003-07:00

Okay kids... so my friend Jen and I have been curious about bathroom habits (i.e. why do people pick which stall) and since I'm in Grad School mode... I decided to make an anonymous survey. I need at least 100 people to do it to get some decent data and I promise to share it, here, on my blog.

Will you take the survey and pass it along to your friends? THANKS!

Remember, totally anonymous!
http://bit.ly/bathroomsurvey
(fixed the link!)

A blog... ignored

2009-11-03T21:18:00.001-07:00

Okay, I admit my guilt. I have TOTALLY neglected my blog. It is so sad. When I realized it today I had a little tear.

BUT in my defense, I haven't been resting on the old laurels. (Where does that saying come from anyway? Hold on... Ah here ... well now I rethink the usage of that...)

ANYWAY! I have been hard at work. We had the crazy stretch of Jewish holidays and in between, I had my 10 year high school reunion. Then in addition, I started working at Level 3 Telecommuncations twice a week. It is an internship in the BMG marketing department and really fascinating. Not my total cup of tea, but I am learning so much.

AND I have been writing, I know, shocking! (Yes, I write a blog but I do claim to not be a writer.) Check out the article I wrote on College and Faith for Patheos. I spend so many days reading fabulous Jewish articles and finding content for Patheos as well as coming up with social networking strategies and ways to enhance our SEO. Recently, I have been editing video. I forgot how much I enjoy that.

And I volunteer. I am the Chapter Advisor for the University of Colorado at Boulder chapter of Gamma Phi Beta. I love working with these women and advising them. Recently I took on the commitment to meet and take out for coffee or ice cream every new member this semester... there are 83 of them. So, yeah... I've been busy.

What haven't I been doing? Dating. Kinda bums me out and I'd like to do more of that but it's hard to find that right person right now in Denver. I'm afraid to settle. But also... I just don't have time to commit to looking or dating. Sad but true. I will refocus energies on that later. :)

But I have been hanging with some super cool Jewish chicks and I enjoy that. And I will be snow boarding this winter which is fun too.

Anyway, that's my update. I think I will try to be better with this blog. I really enjoy it... when I remember it... :)

Second 9/11 Story

2009-09-17T14:13:00.000-06:00

Sorry this one is a little late but I feel compelled to share it.

It is the story of my friends Esty and Dovi Scheiner.

Esty and Dovi were raised in the Lubavitch communities in Crown Heights and Boro Park, respectively, in Brooklyn. They were set to be married on Tuesday, September 11, 2001.

The day of your wedding, in Judaism, holds a lot of different rituals than typical weddings. Yes, the bride has her hair and nails done but also the bride and groom (kallah and chassan) fast during the day of their wedding. They say all the psalms (tehillim) and it is said that you are closest to G-d on your wedding day.

Dovi woke up that day and went to shul to pray. He davvened (prayed) fervently and was completely unaware of what was happening some miles away. When he emerged from shul and saw the smoke, he knew there was something wrong. Some decisions had to be made. Esty and Dovi met with their rabbi to make some decisions. Their rabbi counseled, "Look at it as Osama Bin Laden did something evil, and you are doing something small but good."

So they were married. Emotions ran high. Dovi nearly fainted during the ceremony and had to have an IV put in. But something in them forever changed. It became their mission together, the mission of their marriage to foster a Jewish cultural life in Lower Manhattan. The run a group called World Tikkun Center (WTC) and The Soho Synagogue that makes Judaism accessible to everyone.

This couple and their mission has been incredibly inspiring to me and their story is a unique one. I am proud to call them my friends and I hope you visit them if you are ever in Soho!

9/11 - 911 - Sept 11 - 11 Sept

2009-09-11T11:35:00.003-06:00

I can't believe it has been a full 8 years since September 11, 2001. It does feel like yesterday sometimes... and sometimes it feels like I saw it in a movie... wasn't Will Smith in that one?

So in the spirit of the day, I will share my story.

September 11, 2001 - Jacksonville, Florida

I was a junior at Jacksonville University. It was like any other morning. I didn't want to get up and go to my Theatre Design class. Hell, I just didn't want to get up. I have a habit of waking up to my alarm, turning on the TV to the Today Show or CNN and falling back asleep. In my half-asleep state, I peeked through my eyelids and saw an image of smoke coming out of the World Trade Center. In my half-asleep state, my brain said, "Why are they showing file footage of '93?"

Then I sat straight up in bed. This wasn't fake. Matt Lauer was telling me that this was happening right NOW. I sat in my bed, bolt upright staring at my little dorm room/college apartment television, listening to Matt Lauer talk and watched the second plane hit the second tower. That is an image I can never forget. I sat in shock, disbelief, but faith that everything will be all right.

Once my shock wore off, I ran and woke my roommates. I kept one eye on the TV while I got dressed. I finally tore myself from the television and practically ran to the other side of campus, to the fine arts building where my class was. When I got there, the entire staff and all the students in class in that building were huddled around a tiny, tiny TV. I remember that it was smack dab in the middle of Mary's office (she was the receptionist for the theatre and dance department) and students, faculty, deans were all huddled, some in folding chairs, some standing, some on the floor just... watching.

I don't know how long I watched. Classes were, clearly, canceled for the day. JU attracts many students from the northeast and I watched my friends call home and ask about family and friends. Consequences weren't setting in... it wasn't real. The realities would come soon.

When we heard the Pentagon had been hit, it was a shock, sort of. I don't think I had any more capacity to be shocked by that point. Until it hit me. The man I had been dating off and on was currently serving in the Air Force and he was stationed to be at the Pentagon on certain days. But which days? Come on Talia! Just remember what days was he supposed to be there. My brain lost its ability to function. Shock turned to fear. I tried to call him. No luck. No phone calls were going out. Phone lines were jammed. I had to be pulled aside by a friend to be calmed down. When my head finally cleared, I could think. Today is Tuesday. He works there Monday and Wednesday. Breathe.

Finally at some point in the early afternoon we couldn't take it anymore. We couldn't sit in that stuffy office that smelled like old sheet music and ancient costumes. My apartment-mate, Zeina and I started the seemingly long walk back home. Silence enveloped us. We couldn't talk. We couldn't communicate. We could only think. This young Jewish woman and her best friend, a beautiful Lebanese woman took comfort in each others presence. When we got home, we took comfort in cooking.

That's what we do. We feed. It's ingrained in both of us from our cultural heritage. We propped open our apartment door, turned on the TV, and cooked. We welcomed anyone who needed somewhere to be. We fed them until we ran out of food. And we sat, as a community, together absorbing what happened.

When I could finally speak to my parents, I told them about my day. My father's first response was, "We have to stand with Zeina and her family now." It seemed like an odd statement to me at the time. I didn't understand. What had Zeina done? Nothing. Except to have been born to an Arab Christian family. Yes, they left Lebanon as Zeina was born to escape the wars but the climate in the United States of America was not a nice one when it came to our Arab brothers and sisters, post-911. Her father had to shave his facial hair because he feared profiling when he traveled. Reality #1

Jacksonville is home to many military bases. With three military facilities plus the King's Bay Sub base close by, Jacksonville was high on the "potential target" list. Additionally, the city is held together with more bridges than I care to count. JU became an insulated campus, one that we were afraid to stray from in the days after the attacks. Reality #2

Bet ya didn't know that tiny, liberal arts university JU has the second-largest NROTC program in the nation. After 911, I watched friends disappear. With the start of the war, I saw many more go. Reality #3

When I didn't want to wake up that morning and I rolled over to catch 5 more minutes, I had no idea my life was going to change. I still remember being walked to the gate for my flights prior to 911. I remember when we weren't angry at every foreigner and Osama Bin Laden was just a funny name I had never heard of.

My life went on, we all grew and adapted to the changes in security, and I refused to be afraid to fly but our world changed drastically that day.

My Rebbe, my father's Rebbe, Reb Zalman wrote a beautiful prayer for peace for 9/11. Here is a link to it - http://bit.ly/911RebZ

Since this post has gotten rather long, stay tuned. I have an uplifting post coming about my friend's very unique experience on 9/11. Possibly the only people in the world that have 9/11/01 as their anniversary.

Matis and Matthue

2009-08-28T15:19:00.007-06:00

B"H

I really have been enjoying Matthue Roth's work (which I find on Facebook, My Jewish Learning, and his blog). His writing has really inspired me in the time I have been doing the Jewish content for Patheos. In fact, his article on Molly Goldberg + the interview with Aviva Kempner on NPR got me researching and ultimately writing about Molly.

So Matthue has recently done an interview with Matisyahu for MJL which is a really incredible piece. He (and MJL) so graciously let me use it for the Patheos website. I really love how Matis and Matthue talk about Matis' evolving style and niche of music. I challenge all the people out there who claim Matisyahu "isn't real reggae" (just look at his YouTube channel for the nasty comments) to show me an artist who's sound doesn't evolve and who fits solidly into a specific genre. More, I see a kid who was influenced by this genre and choose to imitate it (after all, imitation is the best form of flattery). Matis isn't trying to be Bob Marley... he's trying to be Matthew Paul Miller aka Matisyahu. He's praising Hashem in a way that is relevant ... TO HIM. And it has become relevant to others too. His music speaks to a generation. Why? Because here we sit, young adults, children of the baby boomer/hippies, as a favorite song says... looking for a place to land. Trying to find our niche, our place in this world. We watched our parents boom and bust, heard the stories & listened to the records (yes, records) from their youth. Found out how they accidentally ended up at Woodstock (not kidding, my dad rocks but that is a story for another time), all the while waiting for our chance.

Most of us didn't/don't have adversity to conquer, no civil rights battle, no JFK, no need for bootstraps. Where most of our parents moved away from religion for spirituality, we move towards it. We crave connection but it's not so easy any more. Young people are going back to church/temple/synagogue in droves to find it but there are distractions. Television, Facebook, getting drinks on a Friday night, being too hung over on Sunday. What speaks to the Twitter generation? Chabad dinners, Matisyahu, Reb Zalman's weekly siddur on cd (I try to listen to it at least once a day to get my davvenen in) ... technology. A different kind of worship.

I have seen Matis perform live three times (once in NYC and twice in Denver) at three very different stages of his evolution.
NYC - brand, spankin' new. No one knew who he was. We got home burned versions of his first CD, small crowd but we knew that this guy was going to be someone. They didn't have problems filling seats but it was 40 - 60 people.
Denver, pt 1 - Matis is getting popular. His music is the same but he has a broader following, outside of Judaism. I saw him at The Paramount in Denver and the house is packed (1980 seats... don't ask me how I know that). He sang the Sh'ma at one point, telling the crowd that this is a very sacred prayer for Jews. Instead of covering my eyes to say the Sh'ma like I normally do, I turned around. I was standing next to the stage and behind me was nearly 2000 people standing in awe. Some had their hands in the air, like how some Christians prostrate to G-d in church. Some had their eyes covered like Jews traditionally do during the Sh'ma and some just watched this man pray, in front of them, with fervor.
Denver, pt 2 - The Mile High Music Festival version. When I saw Matis was playing this huge music festival I was excited. I figured not that many people would be interested in his music and I could get up nice and close and enjoy the show... I was wrong. I was dead wrong. I couldn't have been wronger (yes, I know that isn't a word). We got to the tent early-ish... but not early enough. It was already packed 30 minutes before his set... and it kept getting more packed. First people kept inching closer, then we had to stand up so there was room for more people, eventually, we were packed into the tent like sardines. He started his set and the crowd went wild. One guy took off his Mogen David necklace (the Jewish star) and was waving it in the air but most of the people there weren't Jewish. They went because he gave them a connection to something more than just the music. He connected them to their faith.

Is Matisyahu a symptom of a change or the cause? I would honestly say a symptom. Matisyahu's life story reads as fairly typical (ish) of my generation (of course, if you read it generally). He was a normal kid in White Plains, NY. Grew up liking Reggae music, smoked pot, didn't like school, felt no connection to his Judaism. Until he met a Chabad rabbi in Washington Square. Then it all changed for him. He went to a Chabad yeshiva, married a good frum girl and the rest is history. But he used his music to connect to his Judaism and entertain his yeshiva-mates. And now, really, the rest is history. I think he melded his secular upbringing with his new found observance. And that observance has been evolving too. He has jumped around to different sects of Judaism but the key is that Judaism is still central to how he lives his life.

For those of us who grew up with varying levels of religious observance who are being drawn to the more observant level, it's about melding our experiences, not forgetting them. Though the Orthodox Jews I hang out with don't have tattoos, I look at my tattoos as a badge of my history, of where I have been and where my journey has taken me. I am proud of my battle scars, the ones I have incurred on my journey to finding my level of observance and spirituality. The fact that mine is much more orthodox than my parents isn't unusual anymore. Really, we are all just a part of the Matisyahu generation.

And I leave you with a blessing Reb Zalman gave to me & my parents - "May your children be so frum (observant) that they won't even eat in your home."

Read Matthue Roth's interview with Matisyahu here - http://bit.ly/MatisLight

Drumroll please....

2009-08-21T22:32:00.001-06:00

The results are in!

I made it to the semi-finals of the Mad Men photo competition!! I am so excited, if for no other reason than there were over 4,500 entries and I am in the top 10 women! Thanks to everyone who voted for me, tweeted it, Facebooked it, and generally made me viral. :)

Here's a link to the semi-finalists - http://bit.ly/MMSemiFinalist

Stay tuned. I don't know when we find out who wins but I will let you know when I know!

-t

Let's talk about my new favorite photo...

2009-08-11T20:29:00.002-06:00

Thanks for @partridge for this!

Mad Men contest part deux

2009-08-04T16:17:00.003-06:00

Okay, so I don't want to cast aspersions on this process but...

The voting has been crazy. Doing my super-PR girl thing, I got the word out there about me. There have been over 500 clicks on my link - bit.ly/adgal (which is why I use bit.ly, they let you track clicks) but I am landing on the 8 or 9 page! EVERYONE in the contest has only 2 stars with the exception of one girl. She has three stars and has been sitting pretty as #1 in the contest for over a week. That is pretty strange considering that no one has stayed that steady in this game. Her shot is alright but I doubt she has more friends voting than all the rest of us who have been blogging, Facebooking and Tweeting about it. I am pretty positive that the only people who have been voting are friends of contestants and Maddicts. It is clear that everyone is going around ranking themselves a 5 and everyone else a 1. This, though logical, seems silly and unfair. There are pictures that do not capture the essence of this competition ranking in the top 20, and that is silly!

It's turned into one big f-you fest and I don't like that. It's who's friend network is bigger and who can find auto-voting software to outsmart AMC. :( Very disappointing.

I hope the powers that be take a good look at the votes before picking the winners.

All that being said, I am not a sore loser. I had fun doing this and would do it again and I do, desperately want to play in the costume room for the show sometime (okay, maybe the props too).

So please, vote for me. We have until Monday. Again, my link is bit.ly/adgal

Ever feel like you were born at the wrong time?

2009-08-02T16:20:00.002-06:00

I have... I have a passion for the advertising of the 1950's & 60's. Well, needless to say, my favorite television show is Mad Men.

So when I heard that Banana Republic (one of my favorite stores) and Mad Men were hosting a contest, I knew I had to enter! The prize? Priceless! A chance for a walk on role on Mad Men but the Banana $1000 gift card doesn't hurt! So I got a good friend of mine who is an incredible photographer to take some great pics of me wearing my favorite 50's style (Banana Republic) dress all around Denver! They came out amazingly!

So how does this work? Well, I need all of you to go to this website (AdGirl Talia) and vote for me (you don't have to register). Everyday! :) Please give me 5 stars. The competition is interesting, I would say most of it is headshots and wedding pics, a lot of snaps taken on a night out but there are some die hard Mad Men fans (we call ourselves Maddicts) that have done a good job. The public vote gets you through the first round. Top 10 women and top 10 men. Then the creator of Mad Men makes his choice - 60% on Mad Men style and 40% on creativity. Well, I really hope to win so I need your help! Please vote often and high! :0)

Thanks!!! Oh and here is the link to the other pics from the photo shoot - Photo Shoot (pics by Ben Barefoot)

And here are some pics from the new season (you just try to tell me that I don't look like I fit right in! :)) - Mad Men Season Three

Mad Men Contest

2009-07-25T21:42:00.002-06:00

So the BRILLIANT minds behind Mad Men and the clothing line, Banana Republic have come up with a fab contest.

Submit your best "Mad look" and win a walk on role one Mad Men...

Well, since I A. am addicted to Mad Men and B. am a Mad Ave gal myself (okay, not NYC but I am a PR/Marketing professional in Denver) and C. have a very special affinity for the 50's/early 60's... especially in fashion, I am entering the competition.

I will send out the link to my page when I submit so stay tuned. AND please vote for me! :) After looking at the 400 or so pics they have up now, I am confident in my photo shoot! :)

Obama, Israel and the Financial Crisis pt. 2

2009-07-24T14:27:00.004-06:00

So the previous post was born out of my Facebook conversations today.

I would like to share with you the extended conversation I had with an acquaintance from college. We will call him "JU" (like our university). A few others jumped into the conversation and I will add them in with appropriate names. :)

After I posted the Patheos discussion about the Dems blaming the Jews, I got this comment on my wall - (here we go folks, be sure you are strapped in and ready for the ride)

JU - talia, I'm curious...would you still support Obama if he apologized to the world for the United States provoking Iran to send a nuclear missle into Jerusalem?

Jen - I don't think the US would have to provoke Iran for that to happen. I don't think I understand the hypothetical you've posed.

JU - The President would blame the US for this

Jen - on what are you basing this assumption?

JU - The international apology tour that he undertook several months ago.

Jen - so because he make an international trip, it's an "apology" tour? your logic still eludes me....

JU - He dislikes this county, the founding documents he finds a document of "Negative rights", and will bow to a Saudi King. With no basis he calls Cambridge police stupid for arresting a black professor who was acting beligerent toward an officer of the law ..Obama takes ten days to comment on the attrocities that the Iranian people suffered after ... Read Moretheir election; sat in a Church pew for 20 years listening to an anti-semitic preacher, Jeramiah Wright. The cynicisim posed in my question is to find out if Talia sides with Israel or Obama?

Jen - I think you're funny in a belligerent and mis-informed sort of way. There is still no logic in what you are saying. However, I will have to let Talia answer your question, which perhaps I should have done to begin with rather than engage in this madness. Curiosity got the better of me.

ME! THD - I highly disagree that the two are mutually exclusive. I believe that Obama is the man to take our country to the next level, into the 21st Century. I think he has the compassion and understanding to handle international diplomacy as well as domestic with tweezers, rather than the sledge hammer our former president used.

I think President Obama supports Israel and Jews but sees a need for this insane Middle Eastern feud to end. And I agree with Jen, Iran doesn't need any provocation to attack Israel. They have been threatening for years and years.

Eretz Yisrael is my spiritual homeland. I spent time there and love the land and my people. I support Israel and do not want to see it split into pieces but I also have good friends who are Arabs, Muslims, and who call themselves Palestinians. ... Read More

I think Mr. Obama was correct to open dialogues with the Arab nations. Without dialogue, there can be no peace or understanding. I do not believe that America can survive as an insular country... (it continued but took a bit to type, so there were responses in between)

More after the jump

Jen - 100% agree with all that you stated beautifully, Talia!

Archangel - Though I am conservative on most issues, I can attest that Talia is one damn cool lady. One *hella* cool lady. She's *slightly* less cool for having voted for Obama; but not much.

THD - ... we have moved past the place where we can sit in judgment of others from afar. The world has changed. We are all becoming assimilated into the same culture. One of iPods, cell phones, and the internet. We retain little of our identity. As my friend puts it - national distinctions are disintegrating.

I am an American and proud but I am also proud of my world and want to make it a better place.

Mr. Obama is helping us do that. He sees that too. Yes, he sat in Jeremiah Wright's church and I am not a fan of Pastor Wright but I try to evaluate a person by who they are and what they do, not who they knew/know. And I NEVER judge another person because that is not my place. Even in your bible is says, "Let he among us without sin be the first to condemn." ... Read More

Iran is a mess, but ignoring them or inciting them to violence won't help the situation.

So yes, I support Eretz Yisrael and President Obama. In fact, I sat in VP Biden's box during his acceptance speech at Invesco Field and wept with thought of a bright future.

JU - What has Obama done to make this country better?

THD - He's been in office for 6 months. I think we owe him the opportunity to work at it. I know that change and improvement doesn't come fast or easy. I am just not willing to judge a person out of hand. Sadly, that is something I am not proud of the USA, the constant need to judge, blame, and vilify. At least I gave former President Bush a few years ... Read Morebefore I decided he wasn't right for this country.

I do love how that is the argument the right gives, So what has he done to change things? We are still recovering from 8 years of mismanagement.

Jen - Exactly! I don't understand how people can suggest that all of the complex problems we are facing can or should be fixed inside of 6 months. It took eight years (plus) to get us here. It will take time to get out, but at least someone has acknowledged that change is needed and is trying to make the connections with the world that are needed to do so.

JU - No, this 10% unemployment is his, the National Ownership of GM and Chrysler is his, the Cap and Trade bill that will kill more jobs and raise energy costs is his, this Health Care Refrom Bill his; why is all of this stuff being ram rodded down our throats so quickly? If they say the results are going to take 2 years or more, what's the hurry? The... Read More bailout passed in the Fall of 2008 was done by a Democratically controlled Congress, not Bush. Obama is trying to say that we are going to need a 2nd stimuls...this one hasn't even taking it's complete effects and they want to do more. This is all about Obama...he can try and pass this off, but he is shoving all this down our throats. No one in congress is reading the bills they are voting on, they didn't even complete writing the Cap and Trade Bill before they voted on it...This country is under his watch, and we are tanking, msierably, but that's what he wants...more chaos, more need fo the Big Government to swoop in and take care of it.

Jen - Ridiculous. Unemployment is up because businesses are failing as a result of Bush's obscene allowances for big banks and businesses. Unemployment rates are not the result of 6 months of work, they are the result of trends that span years. Why did the government have to run GM and Chrysler? If they weren't, they would be out of business, which would... Read More have made the unemployement rate even higher. Is it Obama's fault as well that GM and Chrysler were mis-managed privately? Did he somehow reach back in time and produce two insolvent corporations? Yes, health care reform is his - do you know how many people, children especially, as a result of not having health care? Whether the plan is perfect or not, at least he is not just sitting on his arse!

THD - That is so interesting... I didn't realize you could ruin a 233 year old economy without even being in office and then being in office for 6 months. Wow. Interesting.
Bush pushed the TARP through while still in office, he could have vetoed it. There is plenty of fault to go around.

I refuse to accept that one person or one party is at fault here. I could listen to the argument that a combination of Bush's mistakes and Obama trying to fix it has lead us to a place of difficulty but I still am not so narrow minded to believe that one man tanked this economy or that his attempts to fix it have failed. Rather, I know that we have to hit the bottom before we can rise up again. The economy is cyclical and one man didn't ruin it.

But then again, Carl, I don't think you posted this to my wall to have a logical conversation, rather, I think you wanted to give your opinion. Thank you for stating it.

From here on out, I suppose we will have to agree to disagree.

Oh and to Jen's point, I was one of those poor idiots without health care. Going on 11 years, in fact. The previous administration couldn't have cared less about me or if I died in an urgent care waiting room to receive medical treatment I couldn't afford. At least President Obama is trying to help people like me who work hard but don't have the ... Read Moreresources for insurance. (Though I do now have insurance with my current company.)

I may not agree with this FIRST ITERATION of a plan but I do appreciate that he is trying, which is more than can be said for his predecessor.

JU - The US economy has been the most successful in the 233 years of existance because of PRIVATE enterprise, not Government control. GM and Chrysler should have gone through the chapter 11 Bankruptcy process Before getting billions of taxpayer dollars. When was the last time a President of the United States fired the CEO of a company? By the way, tens of thousands of workers lost their jobs after Obama took over GM and Chrysler. They closed hundreds of dealerships. (How can you generate a profit as a car company if you close the means to sell your product) Ask the people in Detroit how this change is working. Government intervention has grown out of control. We are currently running a Trillion dollar deficit, 6 months into the year. the Congressional Budget office is prediciting a Federal Deficit of 12 Trillion dollars by 2012. This is based on the current administrations policies, which were supposed to be new, transparent, bipartisan....he is a Chicago Thug!

Talia, if you went to the Emergeny Room, they coudln't have denied you care. Also, you could have applied for Medicaid. How many times were you sick since you got that insurance...by the way, if this new Health Care Reform Plan is so good, why don't all the Congressmen and President have to be on it? Obama said that if you are 100 and want a pacemaker, it might just be more cost effective to give you a pill. So under the proposed Obamacare, Ted Kennedy would be dead.

THD - Wow, very harsh words at the end there. But again, I am choosing to not judge. You know, your Christian virtues implore you to "Love your neighbor as yourself" (which really comes from the Jewish Torah) but that isn't quite so easy all the time, is it.

Then again another translation of Vayikra or Leviticus 19:18 is ve'ahavta lere'acha kamocha ani Adonai - "Guard the rights of your neighbor as you guard own." So I will guard your right to spew hatred, though I refuse to agree with it.

Again, the right to agree to disagree. Your arguments will not change my mind, nor will mine change yours and that is a freedom we are gifted with in America.

Excuse me, I forgot to add to the translation. At the end it says "Ani Adonai" which means, I am Adonai (G-d).

JU - Talia, I simply urge you to not be a drone that believes all that the President says...do some investigative work, like you have with the statisitc about anit-semitic democrats, which fueled this fire. Read the actual bill and see if it says what the President is claiming...this bill is about control not providing health care.

THD - And who says I haven't? Just because I don't agree with you? I thank you for your concern but "being a drone" has never been a problem for me.

___
Whew! What a conversation. I can't say I enjoyed it but it was a great brain exercise. :)

Obama, Israel and the Financial Crisis pt. 1

2009-07-24T13:52:00.005-06:00

So... as part of my job at Patheos, I posted a discussion in our discussion forum. Here is a link to it - Are Jews to Blame?

In a nutshell (help I'm in a nutshell... sorry couldn't resist) it discusses that more Democrats than Republicans BLAME JEWS!!! for the financial crisis!!!! 34%, in fact!! That is incredible to me considering that we Jews don't have any financial magical power. There are those stereotypes. There have always been those stereotypes. Why? Because back in the day, Jews were forbidden from doing many jobs. Money lending was considered "dirty" so it was relegated to the "hated" class, the Jews. Hence, we got pretty good with numbers and some families stay in the business. Now, I don't have my head in the sand and I know that Bernie Madoff perpetrated one of the largest ponzi schemes in the history of the world and that he was Jewish but what about these?

(My post continues below these...)

(borrowed from - Business Pundit)

10. The Fraudulent Feminist - no evidence of Jewish heritage

In 1880, Boston Ponzian Sarah Howe promised women 8% interest on a “Ladies Deposit.” She said it was only for women, selling an implicit assumption of safety. She took the Money and ran.

9. The Haiti Haters - not Jewish

Ponzi schemes popped up all over Haiti in the early 2000’s. These schemes sold themselves as government-backed “cooperatives.” They ran mainstream-sounding ads, some of which featured Haitian pop stars. As a result, people felt safe investing more than $240 million–60% of Haitian GDP in 2001–into the schemes, which ended up being a massive swindle.

8. The Scientologist Snake - Scientologist

Earthlink co-founder and Scientology minister Reed Slatkin posed as a brilliant investment advisor for A-list Hollywood residents and corporate bosses. Working out of his garage, Slatkin cheated the rich and famous out of roughly $593 million, creating fake statements referring back to fake brokerage firms to prove his mettle. He fed the Church of Scientology with millions of his winnings. In 2000, the SEC caught wind that Slatkin wasn’t licensed, and busted the scheme.

7. The Lottery Uprising - no evidence of Jewish involvment

When Albania was moving out from behind the Iron Curtain in the mid-1990s, a powerful government and environment of questionable ethics resulted in a financial system dominated by pyramid schemes. The government endorsed various Ponzis, which robbed the majority of the population and netted more than $1 billion in losses. Albanians rioted and overthrew the government.

6. The Costa Rica Crooks - evidence of Christian faith

Three Costa Rican brothers, Enrique, Osvaldo and Freddy Villalobos, defrauded clients–mostly American and Canadian retirees–out of $400 million in a 20-odd-year unregulated loan scheme that started in the late 1980s. They promised interest rates of 3% per month on a minimum investment of $10,000. Villalobos moved money through shell companies before paying investors. Its staying power had to do with the fact that margins were low, the brothers were disciplined, and the outfit just barely skirted past laws.

5. The Biblical Bilker - Christian

In fraud-rich Florida, the Greater Ministries International church used Bible-speak to cheat its flock out of $500 million. Starting in the early 1990s, the church, led by gun-toting minister Gerald Payne, offered worshipers investments in gold coins. Payne then created an investment plan that would “double the ‘blessings’ that people invested” by funneling money towards the church’s fake precious metals investments. According to the Anti-Defamation League, Payne said that God had modernized the multiplication of the loaves and fishes and asked him to share the secret.

$500 million later, the Feds caught Payne, but most investors never got their money back.

4. The Boy Band Bandit - Jewish

Beginning in the late 1980s, Lou Pearlman, Art Garfunkel’s cousin and former manager of ‘N Sync and the Backstreet Boys, offered attractive returns through his FDIC-insured Trans Continental Savings Program. The scheme was neither a savings and loan nor FDIC-approved, but that didn’t stop Pearlman from bilking investors out of nearly $500 million, with which he planned on funding three MTV shows and an entertainment complex.

3. The Retiree Plunderer - no evidence of Jewish heritage

Mexican resort owner Michael Eugene Kelly schemed retirees and senior citizens out of $428 million. He offered them timeshare investments in Cancun hotels that he called “Universal Leases.” The timeshares came with rental agreements promising investors a nice fixed rate of return. Most of his victims used their retirement savings, thinking they would get solid, low-risk returns. The SEC says that “more than $136 million of the funds invested (came) from IRA accounts.” Kelly, meanwhile, bought himself a private jet, racetrack, and four yachts.

2. Madman Madoff - Jewish

Bernard Madoff’s scam is still unfolding. The facts as we know them now are that Madoff spent decades building the biggest Ponzi scheme in history, bilking nonprofits, famous people, funds, banks, and countless others out of $50 billion.

1. The Namesake - no evidence of Jewish heritage

The King of Get Rich Quick, Charles Ponzi became a millionaire in six months by promising investors 50% return in 45 days on international postal coupon investments. He earned $15 million, which in 1920s terms was serious money. After Ponzi was caught, investors only received $5 million back.

More after the jump

Why does it come up when they are Jewish but you don't hear, "Catholic Jim Smith just stole 180 bazillion dollars from little old ladies." When a Jew or Muslim missteps, it has to be a symptom of a horrible religion?

Well, it seems like age old anti-semitism is taking hold again. Here are a few interesting studies - Pew shows us that there are increasingly negative views of Jews in Europe but also in America - here.
This is the study about the Dems and Jews - here

I would be interested to hear your opinions too. Here are what some of my Facebook friends have said -
MF - while I'd like to see their methodology a bit more closely, if this is indeed accurate, it's pretty alarming, but I wouldn't say surprising. Racism exists more than we care to admit (ask the Harvard professor). And, frankly, lots of people still think that "THE JEWS" control the global financial system.

JB - Awesome. I think I'll be starting up a concierge service for overseas relocation...call it MOT Travel. France, England, Sweden anyone?

DS - Seriously? Anti-Semitism is so 1900's!

SS - I mean, isn't easier to blame the Jews than anyone else... Doesn't history prove this? the more things change, the more they stay the same.

BF - Why does this not surprise me?

LZ - It's the WWJC, don't let the gentiles know that the World Wide Jewish Conspiracy is alive and well. Let's ask the financial branch to find out who these 34% are and ruin their credit ;) I mean we do run the banks. While we're at it call the boys in Media to cover it up, because we run Hollywood too, right.

Idiots!

My response to these -
I couldn't agree more, guys. I was really surprised to read that more Dems than Repubs felt this way. It is interesting that people equate Democrats with Jews. While that is true for most reform Jews, it is the opposite for orthodox. Because they are socially conservative, they align more with the Republicans.

Also, most Evangelical Christians are Republican and too, most Evangelicals are Israel supporters.

But yes, DS, anti-semitism is so 1900's but alive and well here. Reading some comments about Israel and Jews lately has made me want to hurl.

DS - As a Christian, I see myself first and foremost a supporter of justice, peace, and truth, regardless of nationality, race, gender, etc. So, whenever there is oppression, violence, or deception, I mourn how far these practices are from the Almighty's desires of people.

BR - Hrm. Coincidentally, just ran across this today: http://pewglobal.org/reports/display.php?ReportID=262

CL - All I can say is that is dumb.

Interesting conversation today.

There she is, folks — that's Molly Goldberg, a woman with a place in every heart and a finger in every pie.

2009-07-14T15:00:00.004-06:00

If you are like me (a week ago) you have NO idea who Molly Goldberg/Gertrude Berg is.

I was listening to NPR on Friday and heard a very interesting story. It was about this Jewish woman in the 1920's who created a sitcom, The Goldbergs. In fact, she created the genre of sitcom, to an extent. It started as a radio show and then was adapted to television. It went off the air in the 1950's. Sadly, most of the episodes were destroyed but there are a few historical records of the radio show and television show.

I read a great article on MyJewishLearning.com about The Goldbergs. Read it here
Also, there is a new film out called, Yoo-hoo, Mrs. Goldberg (a signature call of that show), by Aviva Kempner. Here is the interview with Aviva on NPR (which is what sparked my curiosity).

Gertrude Berg was an actress and writer (screenwriter, eventually), one of the first women to hold those roles. She was born in NY to a Jewish family and wrote about what she knew, Jewish family life in NYC. She was the first person to receive the Emmy for Lead Actress in a Comedy Series but things weren't always funny for Gertrude. She was loyal to her cast/friends, almost to a fault. When her television husband, Phillip Loeb, was accused of Communism (he was involved in the Actor's Equity Union and AFRA to better conditions for actors), Gertrude stood by him... until she was forced to let him go for fear that the show would be taken off the air. She did, however, keep him quietly on the payroll because he was eminently unemployable after being blacklisted by McCarthy. Though she provided for him, Phillip Loeb sank into a depression. Being unable to work and with failing eyesight, he ultimately committed suicide in 1955.

Gertrude addressed real issues affecting Jews in America with her scripts. Ms. Kempner mentions this in her interview with NPR, "Very early on as Hitler rose in power, she had a very overt Passover scene on radio," says Kempner. "Some months after Kristallnacht, she had a stone being thrown through the window on the radio show, and while no one was addressing the Holocaust on TV, she had an episode where she got letters from her relatives."

But Molly Goldberg was everyone's mother during those 26 years (20 years on radio and six years on television)... imagine that! 26 years! We are lucky if a show lasts one year these days.

She was the stereotypical Jewish mother but not in a negative way. Always positive and with dignity. It didn't matter where you lived or if you had ever met a Jew, you loved Molly Goldberg.
President Roosevelt supposedly said, "I didn't get us out of the Depression, The Goldbergs did."

Once the television show went off the air, Gertrude moved onto the Broadway stage earning a Tony for her work in A Majority of One.

Gertrude Berg (zt"l) passed away in 1966.

What a powerful history that I never knew. I will be looking for anything I can find from the amazing 26 years of The Goldbergs and if you want to see something now, the article from MyJewishLearning.com has a few clips.

Mayim Balik on What Not To Wear

2009-07-07T12:38:00.001-06:00

I have to say that I was incredibly disappointed in this episode of What Not To Wear.
What they neglected to show is that Mayim is an Orthodox Jewish woman and she following the laws of tznius (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tznius). They even had her study partner on the show to talk about it (http://www.jewinthecity.com/a/2009/05/mayim-bialik-to-guest-star-on-a-very-special-jew-in-the-city.html) but they cut it.

They criticize the length of her skirts and encourage her to hem her skirts shorter and wear sleeveless tops but that may not be what she feels is appropriate. Why can't we find modest and attractive clothing? Why can't longer skirts look attractive? Why isn't modesty attractive?

I was really looking forward to this episode to see beautiful modest clothing in respect of Mayim's beliefs but I was disappointed... I still love Stacey and Clinton but I think they missed a great opportunity to speak to a chunk of the population who dress modestly.

Love/Hate

2009-07-06T16:19:00.008-06:00

Things that I love -

Rainstorms
My family (even if they are crazy)
Clean sheets
Squash (... I'm not even a little bit kidding, and yes, I mean the veg)
A night out with friends
Learning new Jewish "stuff"
Catching Sherlock Holmes/Hercule Poirot/M*A*S*H*/Murder, She Wrote on tv randomly
Making new friends
Writing letters and postcards by hand & using the postal service to mail them
Benefit blush (shallow, I know... but I do love it) & mascara
My besties that I rarely see because I live by mountains and they live by oceans
Friends who step up and love you when you need it
People who do random acts of kindness for no reason
Honest compliments
QUOTES!

Things that I hate -

Food that is so spicy that is makes my mouth burn
When people abruptly stop talking to me
Intolerance
Restaurants that don't serve anything that doesn't have pork or shellfish in it (SOME PEOPLE CAN'T EAT THAT STUFF!!)
Unanswered text messages
People who hold grudges
Being judgmental
Lies (especially the ones that hurt)
Short rainstorms
Men who can't grow up & treat people around them like crap
People who don't know that bacon is pork (okay, it is pretty funny... but seriously!)
People who you trust but then treat you like crap
People who manipulate you
Not being able to let go of the hurt

I saw this quote forever ago and I hang onto it
because I need to remember it -

Never make someone a priority
who makes you an option.
Let the filtering begin.

New Fav Blog (other than my dad's of course)

2009-07-01T14:57:00.004-06:00

Do the words "Jon" "and" "Kate" make you want to hang yourself? Have you dreamt of putting gum in Kate's hair just so she has to cut those ridiculous things she calls bangs off? Have you checked with your significant other to see if you can handle adopting at least the 6 little ones (because frankly, Maddie is a little brat) to save them from the woman to has pictures to prove she gave birth to them? Then this blog is for you...

I think it is HILARIOUS.

Things I Want To Punch In The Face

A great shul guide

2009-07-01T14:36:00.004-06:00

I got this in an email from Parasha Partners today. It is a really helpful guide for the Saturday morning services.

CAN YOU STAND IT?
by RABBI REUVEN DRUCKER

Dear Rabbi:

I occasionally go to synagogue on Shabbat, but feel very uncomfortable — I never know when to stand or sit. I expect that I will eventually figure it out, but it would be helpful if there were some general guidelines you can provide.

Thanks,
Janet N.

Dear Janet:

To stand or to sit - that is the question that has engaged the halachic authorities throughout the centuries. The underpinnings of the answer are fascinating, but before we explain them, let us first state the rule you are looking for.

There are only 6 places during the Shabbat morning service that, strictly speaking, one is required to stand. All other times that you find people standing, it is because they are following certain customs that are laudable, but not compulsory. The 6 places where one should stand are (the page numbers following refer to the ArtScroll Siddur - Heb./ Eng.):

Baruch She’amar (the beginning of what’s called “Pesukei d’Zimra”), p. 370;
V’yavareich David, p. 396;
Amidah (silent prayer), p. 420, and the chazzan’s repetition of the Amidah (unless one is infirm), Kedushah (if one sits during the repetition), p. 422;
the carrying of the Sefer Torah (Torah scroll), p. 436 & p.458;
the Mussaf prayer and its repetition by the chazzan, p. 462, including Kedushah, p. 464 (if one sits during the repetition);
Aleinu, p. 480.

It should be noted that standing is only a requirement for those who are capable of standing. If, however, one is unable to stand because of physical limitations, he or she should certainly recite the above passages and will be accredited with having said them properly.

The reason we stand for 1) and 2) is that they are recited in the section of Pesukei d’Zimra that are praises about G-d. These two passages express His primary praises, and therefore we stand to show our fullest reverence. We stand for 3), which is the silent prayer. It is called “Amidah” (lit. ‘stand’) because we find that our Patriarch, Abraham, stood when he established the morning prayer (see Genesis 19:27). Whenever the Sefer Torah is being carried (4), we have an obligation to display it the greatest honor. We stand during the Aleinu prayer because the first and last letter of the prayer expressed in the first passage spell eid, (‘witness’), and in Jewish law a witness is required to stand when giving testimony. The content of the Aleinu prayer is a declaration of our faith, essentially our testimony about the Creator’s existence.

The practice of standing during the performance of a mitzvah is traced to the mitzvah of Sefiras HaOmer, the counting of the 49 days between Passover and Shavuos. According to one tradition, the Torah requires this counting be done in a standing position. There is much discussion among the early authorities regarding the linkage of other mitzvos to Sefiras HaOmer. Those that are linked must also be performed in a standing position. All authorities agree that putting on a Tallis (a four-cornered fringed garment) and the blowing of the shofar on Rosh HaShanah are linked and require standing. Some add that Kiddush Levanah (the blessing on the new moon when it becomes visible), Lulav (the 4 species taken on Succos), and Bris Milah (circumcision) are also linked and require standing. Other authorities add even more mitzvos to this list, based on exegesis. It is interesting to note that all authorities agree that there is a class of mitzvos that one should sit for— blessings that are made on our enjoyment of the pleasures that G-d has given us, for example, the Grace after Meals following a bread meal. Included in this category are the blessings that are made before eating food or enjoying the aroma of different flowers or spices.

While some of the rules of standing may be complicated, one thing is simple. The effort we make to stand when performing a mitzvah is an expression of our respect and readiness to fulfill Hashem’s Will.

Regards,

Rabbi Reuven Drucker

Rabbi Drucker can be reached at rabbidrucker@partnersintorah.org

Submit your questions for publication consideration to parsha@partnersintorah.org

SHORT BLOG = #JackassDay

2009-06-24T11:05:00.003-06:00

So today has officially been declared Jackass Day.

Bad drivers, bad boys, bad social networking sites... just all around annoying. But the best part is nearly everyone in the office is on the same page. So we are trying to trend #JackassDay on Twitter now. And having a great time...

Hilarious... so enjoy Jackass Day and if you want to be cool, help us trend #JackassDay by Tweeting about Jackass Day with the hashtag - #JackassDay

:)

New Crazy Bastard video

2009-06-17T15:08:00.007-06:00

This is the best video! Very awesome.

The irony/poignancy is very cool. Notice the signs on the top left of the screen... and Jacob looking like a homeless person...

The end though... classic... and totally not planned!

Watch it here-

And share it with your friends, email out one of these links (or tweet it or facebook it)! - http://taliashewrote.blogspot.com/2009/06/new-crazy-bastard-video.html or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEIqwNgzHFE

And be sure to check out www.patheos.com for cool discussions and very interesting articles. (And seriously, Jews, got on those discussion boards. The Evangelicals are kicking our butts!) :o)

Wordle Word Cloud

2009-06-17T12:21:00.000-06:00

I love this program.

This is a snapshot of my most used words in my blog.
www.wordle.net

Quotes

2009-05-29T15:27:00.002-06:00

So... I am a total quote girl. I love them, I am touched by them, and I horde them...

But I am simplifying my life so I am going to put them all in this blog post and take them off my Facebook, etc. I'll keep adding so you keep checking. :)

"You have to keep moving forward. As long as you’re holding on to where you were yesterday, you’re standing still." -The Rebbe

"Faith, in its most sublime function, provides man with a level of courage that he could not otherwise achieve"

“…A Rabbi is a person in search of that which can never be found, but he knows that the search is what is important. Somehow to translate faith into life and love into action. And when he experiences it, he catches a glimpse of what everything is all about. And suddenly pettiness disappears. And hurt and aggravation fade away. And there is a light most wondrous to behold. Some people call it redemption. The Rabbi calls it God." –My Grandfather

Reb Nachman of Breslov said: "The voice of my beloved- the pulse. If you want to know G!d, you need only to listen to His voice within. You need never be lonely for Him or out of touch with His inner spirit; you can always touch your pulse and say, "Ah, there you are."

"Intolerance lies at the core of evil. Not the intolerance that results from any threat or danger. Not the intolerance that arises from negative experience. Just intolerance of another being who dares to exist, who dares to diminish the space in the universe left for you. Intolerance without cause.

It is so deep within us, because every human being secretly desires the entire universe to himself. Our only way out is to learn compassion without cause. To care for each other simply because that “other” exists." - The Rebbe

"In a single bond I am bound with Him; my soul is united with Him, burns in Him, cleaves to Him."
- Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai on the day of his passing, Lag BaOmer

"Hayom katzar, v'hamlakha m'rubah" -
"The day is short, the task is great"

"Actors are not made, they are born."
-Angela Landsbury

"I have great faith in fools; my friends call it self-confidence."
- Edgar Allan Poe

"In the midst of difficulty, lies opportunity."
-Albert Einstein

"A sorority is more than letters on a sweatshirt, I say. More than traditional songs, a gold pin, rituals, and obligation, or a way of life. A sorority is learning about people, a sorority is giving without expecting a return. A sorority is earning respect from others, as well as for yourself. A sorority will not solve all your problems. But I have made good friends and found confidence there to help me take life one step at a time."

Sherlock Holmes Trailer (w/ Robert Downey Jr?!?!)

2009-05-22T14:40:00.003-06:00

Okay folks... watch this before you read my blog (but keep reading... please!)

Okay...

So if you have ever read any of my blogs, you know I am a huge Sherlock Holmes fan. I like him because he is flawed. He isn't all brawn and no brains. He loves to engage is mental gymnastics and can spend hours sitting in a chair thinking with his eyes closed before taking action. And yes, I know what you are going to say ... he's a boxer, he's hyper, he has ADD sometimes and yes, he does... but never once did Doyle write a scene where he was boxing or engaging in that type of physical behavior (I believe, I haven't researched this). He eluded to it... but never was Holmes interrupted in the middle of a boxing session. Knowing about that time period, I am inclined to say that Doyle wrote the boxing in to "place" Holmes in society. That was something that gentlemen did. They went to Gentleman Jacks to box. Nothing that I have ever read (and I have read most everything on Holmes) has given me the impression that he was an "action hero."

This new film (and only judging based on the trailer) seems to be an Americanized action flick with a predictable format that they decided to name Sherlock Holmes. I had my doubts from the start. The best Holmes-ian productions have been British. And hey, not discriminating here... I'm American but Doyle was British, Holmes & Watson were... Americans may have a hard time enjoying the subtly of the British humor and what not but an Americanized, cowboy-esq, action hero Holmes doesn't sit right with me.

Needless to say, I will see the film and let you know what I think but ... ... ... ... right now, I'm not sold...

A new spin on comparative religion

2009-05-17T08:34:00.002-06:00

SO, in my last blog (almost a month ago... yeah, sorry about that) I spoke briefly about my new job at Patheos.

Background - Patheos is a comparative religion website with a fantastic interface. It is a fabulous resource for anyone who is studying religion, wanting to know more about their own traditions, or has questions that have plagued them for years. The site launched on May 5 and it has been SO exciting! We have had some great coverage on the launch. See our Time.com article here. Leo and Cathie (the founders) are really passionate about the site and incredibly articulate about it!

Okay, so my role - I am the Community Manager for the site. You can really break the site into a few sections. There are the Gateways and library where the worlds traditions are cataloged and serve as a great resource. The Public Square is a place where the leaders of the faiths who are chronicled as Gateways can weigh in on some of the hottest, most controversial and thought provoking topics in our world today. And then there is the community section. That is where I come in. In the community, we have groups, blogs, and discussion forums. I have been hard at work creating the governance documents for this community. Leo and Cathie, in fact, everyone at Patheos is really committed to making this a safe place to express beliefs and learn about others. It has been a really cool and interesting and hard process for me but I have created some documents that I am really proud of and I think serve this community really well.

In addition to that, I have been learning about the back-end management and how to use the software that we are utilizing for this website. It is Pluck software and it is just so versatile and awesome. I have to say, I was partial geek before but now I am going into full geek mode! It's a lot of fun. Not only do I do the governance but I have also been charged with the social media aspect. Twitter and Facebook and all that jazz. My specialty! I have been learning so many new techniques and measurement ideas.

So that's the new gig. Really enjoying the co-workers, bosses, and the work. I am very happy I made this decision. On to Chapter Five in The Life of Talia. :)

New Job!

2009-04-20T11:42:00.002-06:00

I started a new job today at www.patheos.com. It is a comparative religion website with a social interaction aspect.

I highly recommend checking this site out. It hasn't fully launched yet (look for the main launch on May 5th) but it is super cool. The Judaism gateway needs some work so go to the contact us button if you are interested in being a contributor.

I don't have too much to say about it yet but I will keep you updated. (Come on, today is only my first day!)

Kids are funny

2009-04-12T00:38:00.003-06:00

Sorry that it's been a long time... life got REALLY busy!

Okay so, I have these awesome friends. They live down the street and their daughters go to ballet at BNC. Really fun and sweet family. I will give them fake names to protect their anonymity (but frankly, if you know me or BNC, you will see through my ruse). So Phad and Sen have 4 little girls. They are 8, 6, 4, and almost 2. Really smart and cute kids.

So I knew the 4 year old (we will call her... uhm... Poxy) since she was very little. When she was a toddler, she was so afraid of these primary colored plastic bugs that you could put the in a circle around her and she wouldn't cross it. SO funny. It was a pretty effective baby gate. But I have to say, I think the youngest (we will call her... uhm... Kaherazade) is the funniest.

Disclaimer, I think Sen is pretty much the best mom I have ever met. She is SO giving me mom lessons when I have kids.

So Kaherazade says many funny things. Lately it is "Bunnies, kill me." What she means is she wants her dad to go out and knock off the bountiful bunnies that have taken over their neighborhood. The girl is serious about this. She found a slingshot and gave it to Phad to get the job done! Tonight, we were getting their house ready for Easter while the three older kids were sleeping and making Easter baskets for all four. Kaherzy saw the stuffed, pink and purple, bunnies for the baskets and she kept saying "outside, outside" like we needed to put the stuffed ones outside and kill them! She was so serious! We had to take the bunnies out of sight.

So Kaherzy gives us many band names when she babbles... we like "Bunnies kill me beyotch." Don't steal it. It's ours. Kaherzy says sh*t, beyotch, a**hole, and my fav... c*ck when she means to say talk. Sorry if anyone is offended but it's hilarious and those words are off limits when she gets old enough to remember.

Beyond anything, my favorite is when she knows they are going to ballet or when she sees me and says "Tayah, Tayah." That sweet voice, blue eyes... dude, I am a big puddle.

The coolest thing about hanging with little kids is how in the moment you become and have to be. You can't worry about bills or problems or tomorrow or yesterday... you are right there, right then. Same thing with animals, I think.

I love kids. :-)
And lordy, I have so many good stories to tell at these girls' weddings. :-)

So, Sen said I could spill the beans and anyway I am doing a superior job of protecting their identities... HA HA... but... Sen is pregnant again! Totally unplanned and she didn't know until the middle of last week but she is almost 6 weeks. I am actually hoping for a boy... Phad needs some support in that house... but you know that kid will be dressed in girl clothes because that is what they have on hand! :-)

The State of the Nation('s arts writers)

2009-03-18T15:49:00.002-06:00

Okay. I get the economy is bad... trust me, I REALLY get it! But there has been this disturbing trend of laying off arts reviewers from major newspapers.

The LA Times has a section for Movie, TV, and Music reviews... no dance. Very little about dance on their online site. The Village Voice in NYC? Last I heard Deborah Jowitt, the dance critic, was laid off from the periodical. I hear she is still writing dance for them (she was a biographer of Jerome Robbins) but I don't think she is full time as a dance critic any more.

NYTimes? Anna Kisselgoff is a legend. She is still writing. But those are the biggies, guys. What about the locals?

Here is Denver we lost our full time dance critics a few years ago. Now they all wear multiple hats and are called "Arts Critics." And they do an enormous job. I am not knocking these hardworking folks but when a contact recently told me he couldn't make it because that weekend he had to go to a RollerDerby Dolls event, rock concert, and then a night club opening to cover for the paper, I decided that this has gotten out of hand. How can someone be an expert when they have to see so many different forms of entertainment to keep their jobs? They do a phenomenal job writing the articles but they don't get to connect to the work quite as well when they are running to the Philharmonic for their evening show, all in the same day.

The reason this came about is because our partner, Curious Theatre Company in Denver received this most AMAZING review by a writer for the Westword here in Denver. It is possibly the most beautiful review I have read. The show was incredible but this review, beautiful. Here is a link to the review - The Westword Eurydice

Final word, don't shove the arts to the side and call it okay. We may not be breaking news but we deserve column inches too.

Okay, off soapbox.

The Twitter Revolution

2009-03-17T15:37:00.009-06:00

Well, it has officially happened. Twitter has taken over the world.

In the past week, I have had 10 friends join twitter who were anti-tweet before. Why the change? Why now?

The Denver Post ran an article in the Sunday A&E section about Twitter - http://www.denverpost.com/entertainment/ci_11899588
And on March 3rd they ran this Twitter article - http://www.denverpost.com/entertainment/ci_11826126
Two articles about Twitter in less than two weeks!!!!

Clearly, the press is jumping all over twitter and as it comes out that John Mayer is tweeting nasty about Jennifer Aniston during a concert or Shaq clearly doesn't know how to spell because his tweets are illegible, Twitter has become fodder for the mainstream. AND it is becoming a news source. People in the plane that crashed into the Hudson were tweeting live from the sinking plane and on the ferries. CNN's news isn't breaking anymore because I read it from the people who are experiencing it on Twitter.

Twitter caught my attention in the middle of 2007. At this point I can't remember who urged me to sign up but I had an account and then I read a story about an American kid in Egypt who got thrown in jail. He tweeted, "Arrested" and kept the world updated with his short tweets. The country was mobilized on his behalf in just a few hours and he was released. All because someone, his Tweeps, found out that he was in jail. I wonder how Twitter will figure into court cases and missing persons searches... "Well, Captain, she tweeted that she was meeting a guy out on cty rd 4 at 11:37pm and hasn't been heard from since." That plus GPS in cell phones should help locate missing tweeters.

But back to why the surge in members. I blame Facebook. So we all know by now that Facebook changed their interface and there are articles all over the web about how much it sucks and what people like or don't like (and then there are the people who don't really understand the Web 2.0/3.0 revolution and make up for it by calling those of us who do understand front end and back end systems and all that idiots and dorks and time wasters... I bet you in a month or two they will be calling us to help them get set up on Twitter or Facebook). I'm not here to discuss the pros and cons of it (because frankly, I don't have the time to and it was done really well here - http://www.alternet.org/story/131866) but I think that the new "Twitter-like" Facebook interface helped make Twitter go mainstream but pissed off the Facebookers.

Here's the logic -
Facebook users who are Twitter users saw the similarities immediately. SO we all started Status Updating that and talking about how much we disliked it. That plus the abundance of media coverage about Twitter pushed these people over the edge and they signed up.

Now, I will say that of these people who just registered, many have only tweeted once and the tweet read something like, "Trying this Twitter thing out" or "Signing up for Twitter!" But that's okay guys, just hang in there. I think it was a full year after signing up that I got Twitter-active (now I have 600 some followers and well over 2,000 tweets, I average 16 tweets a day). It took going to the NPAC arts conference in Denver last year to really get me going. I realized I could tweet the wisdom I was getting and share it will my tweeps. It was great!

Anyway, here is another really great blog post on the evangelising of the anti-tweeters - http://www.sarahlacy.com/sarahlacy/2009/03/guest-post-a-facebook-addict-gets-twitter-religion.html

So, needless to say (I think), Twitter is becoming main stream and the early adopters (I like to think of myself as one) will be moving on to the next best thing. And Facebook, you are not it. I'm kinda happy with the change in Facebook... now my addiction is disappearing. Instead of checking it every half hour or so, I maybe check it once or twice a day! Whoo hoo!! I guess I don't need that 12 step for FB after all...

A blog from my father on Purim

2009-03-10T11:51:00.000-06:00

My father wrote a facinating blog on Purim. Please check it out here - Rocky Mountain Hai: An open letter to my dear friend on Purim, slaughter and moderation

"Our path weaves between the weal and woe of life." Wow.

Very cool, Tatti!

G-d's Grand Gestures

2009-03-05T17:38:00.003-07:00

Or should I say Grand... like Grand Pas or Grand Pas d'action... meaning big or large step. A Grand Pas d'action is a large step that contributes to the story being told.

I believe in G-d's Grand Gestures, the Grand Pas d'action of G-d, only because I have first hand experience in them. They come at the crappiest times, putting me in the crappiest positions, and usually with crappy consequences. But the beauty of these, shall we call them, G3s is that there is always something better on the other side.

Not just a little better, infinitely better.

Life changing better.

Beautiful rainbow better.

These huge, crappy experiences are like (in my weak interpretation) G-d smacking me on the back of the head and saying, "Nu*?! What were you thinking?!"
*Nu has the effect of the word "so," sort of. NPR says - "Nu" is a word used to express expectation. At the doctor's office, for example, you can say, "Nu, so how does my heart sound?" At a restaurant, you can say, "Nu, when is our food coming already?" At a friend's coffee table you ask, "Nu, nu, so what's the news with the family?"

Sometimes I think my Pops, my grandpa, is behind it. I picture him up in heaven having his Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi with the Almighty G, looking down at me going, "Uh oh! Excuse me for a second G-d, I need to get my granddaughter's head back into reality."

These revelations don't come without hardship and it is SO like Poppa to let me get deep enough into my own mess before he let's me know I am being stupid. But I'm thankful for it. I have only had to have two serious attention-getters in my lifetime and a few minor ones. Today was one of those minor ones. How annoying! But... I needed it.

Just a reminder to slow down, smell the roses, don't forget to davven, and don't miss the important things in life. So, I'm slowing down. Focusing on me and my needs. And generally enjoying my life.

Basil Rathbone... my hero

2009-03-02T15:17:00.003-07:00

Okay, so I posted in February how I am in love with Sherlock Holmes and recently ordered some old DVDs (Rathbone and Bruce from the 40's and Jeremy Brett from the 80's).

Well, I got them... finally! :-)

As luck would have it, my schedule didn't allow a Sherlock Holmes weekend and there were technical difficulties... (I need another surge protector for my living room tv. The Comcast guy didn't tell me he unplugged my dvd player to plug in the cable box, grrrr.) BUT I have snuck a few episodes in here and there this weekend.

Wow.

First of all, the UCLA Film & Television Archive did an AMAZING job at restoring these films. AND they put a note in the box explaining it. I actually learned a lot! Here is a blurb from their website -

Until 1950, films were produced using nitrate cellulose film stock, a chemically unstable and highly flammable material that inevitably deteriorates and turns to dust. Film preservation historically referred to the transfer of nitrate films to more stable acetate (or safety) film stock. However, acetate film stock also deteriorates, giving rise to a condition called "the vinegar syndrome"; and many of the color films made since 1950 are also subject to irreversible color fading. Many of the Archive's preservation and restoration projects deal with these post-1950 titles. The Archive is relying increasingly on a new polyester film stock, which appears to be much more stable if kept in optimal storage conditions.

They really did a nice job. They found the original front end titles and back end credits that were thrown away and restored the film to it's former glory. There were only a few they couldn't get all the pieces for or were irrevocably damaged.

So the first few episodes, well really, movies (they are over an hour long and were shown in theatres) are totally time warp Sherlock Holmes. They brought Holmes and Watson into WWII to help fight the Nazis. HOW COOL. It is rather funny to see them dressed in the period attire of the 40's rather than the late 1800's but still cool. The writers did a great job adapting Conan-Doyle's character to a new time period. They stayed pretty true to the character. (if you ignore the fact that they say "It's elementary, ____" to nearly every character and that is not something that Conan-Doyle wrote.)

So needless to say, I really am enjoying this collection. And I have two recommendations for you.

1. If you are watching late night tv and see a Brett or Rathbone Sherlock Holmes coming on, WATCH IT!

2. Help support the archive. What they do is invaluable and we have preserved so much history through their techniques.

BIRTHDAY MONTH!!!

2009-03-02T15:05:00.008-07:00

Okay! I think that a birthday is more than just a day. I like to celebrate a birthday month. Not for presents or anything but it just gives me a reason to be excited all month.

So my birthday is March 19... that is 19 full days of joy (you can still celebrate afterwards but you know that the momentum lags a bit after a few days).

But a birthday is also like a new beginning, a new year for your soul/body/mind. Isn't it interesting, as Jews we give ourselves so many new years, new beginnings. Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish new year. Tu b'shvat, the new year for the trees. January 1st, the secular new year. Our birthdays begin a new year for ourselves and you always get to celebrate twice if you use your Hebrew birthdate.

Why do we feel like we need to give ourselves clean slates over and over again? We say on Jan 1st that we will make resolutions. We say on our birthdays that this "one" will be a great one. But on Rosh Hashanah its different. On RH we actually take time to look at our lives and the past year. We reflect on mistakes and mis-steps and ask for forgiveness. We look for opportunities to forgive, reconcile, and start fresh. I like it. No empty promises. No gorging on cake, just a good look at who we are today and what we could do better in the next year. But you still get to have fun. So I am going to use this month to reflect and make adjustments and be excited about the future.

So anyway, Happy Birthday Month to me! And don't forget to celebrate you and how cool you are in your birthday month...

not saying that I'm cool...

but I think I am...

you know what I mean...

right?

Why I feed my addiction to Facebook and how it made me better at my job.

2009-03-02T14:32:00.005-07:00

Okay, I don't have an addictive personality BUT I am totally easy prey when it comes to social networking. I don't know why. I never got addicted to smoking or drinking or anything... except social networking. I mean to the point where I check it on my phone at night in bed and tweet "Good morning, Tweeps" in the morning.

On the surface, you may think that seems sick but it gets worse. I manage accounts all over the social networking world for various groups that I represent. That means that more than half my day is spent logging in to Facebook, Myspace, Twitter, Linked-in, etc. Rarely, (but it does happen) I get SNICS (Social Networking Identity Confusion Syndrome ... I just made that up) and comment on a friend's picture while signed into the wrong account but usually I only do what needs to be done for that group. I do, however, make all my personal friends be friends with those identities on FB. :-)

Right, so let's guess that I spend two hours of my work day on social networking sites (for my main job with Ballet Nouveau Colorado), two more hours a day researching new ways to network & reading articles and an additional five hours a week on sites like YourHub.com, Denver Metro Mix, and This Week in Denver. Break out your calculators kids, that is 25 hours a week spent online networking...

One could say that I have a problem if half my week is spent digging online but I disagree. My intimate knowledge of the way Facebook and Twitter work has only enhanced my ability to do my job. I sat at the National Performing Arts Convention (NPAC) in Denver last summer and listened to well established companies complain that they can't reach the newer generation. The generation that wants to "Go Green" and save the planet, the ones that refuse hard mailings, who are the newest philanthropists and theatre-goers, who can't remember what color the yellow pages are and Google you before they meet you... my generation.

You see, my need to devour information and be an early adaptor for technology has served me right as the PR Director for Ballet Nouveau Colorado. I didn't know I wanted to do PR until I realized it is what I do everyday anyway! I devour articles on the internet and in magazines. If someone has a new program... Friendster, Myspace, then Facebook... I want to be a part of it. I taught myself HTML coding so I could make my profiles look nice in the earlier days before they had the easy profile maker that inserts HTML for you. Anyway, I feel like I am going off on a bit of a tangent here. What I really wanted to say is, you can do it too.

Look, there are three steps to how I work.
Seek. Post. Trend.

Seek - You always have to be looking at what's next. Where are people getting their ideas from? How did you hear about this restaurant or bar or theatre group? Google a popular group in your town and find out where they have their events posted. THEN -

Post - Everywhere. I am not kidding. You better be on all the popular sites but get on every free listing you can. Goodness knows someone looks at it! THEN -

Trend - GET GOOGLE ANALYTICS ON YOUR WEBSITE! Or something comparable. Google's is free and easy to figure out. So, see what the trends are. Are you getting a bunch of hits off a website you never heard of? Go there. Figure it out. Post there.
Seek. Post. Trend.

So you read my rant about "new media experts." I am not claiming to be one but it works for me. The biggest thing I tell any group that approaches me for advice is this... if you are a generation or two above me, while not impossible, you may find this type of work daunting (I'm not being mean here... my boss was the one who said it). Hire a recent college grad who either currently knows your org or can learn about your org and have them manage this. The onus of responsibility does not rest solely on your shoulders. You don't have to learn HTML or tweet all day but you need to have someone in your org doing it for you!

Oh and P.S. I heart Facebook especially because I have found friends that I lost touch with over 22 years ago! Don't underestimate the power of the net, homeslice!

P.P.S. I hate that spell check wants you to capitalize "internet" I don't think it needs it anymore...

Just when I thought it was safe...

2009-02-24T17:39:00.003-07:00

So I posted yesterday about so-called "new media experts" and I stand by what I said but my butt was totally saved today but an SEO expert and I am feeling some remorse.

His website is http://www.ronmedlin.com and his name is (oddly enough ;-)) Ron. He walked me through optimizing our school website. All because I sent a twitter SOS!

So, yes, the glut of "new media experts" still disturbs me but Ron Medlin gave me hope that there are really people out there with more knowledge than I on these subjects.

Check out his site, it is super helpful!

Have you noticed that everyone is now an expert?

2009-02-23T14:00:00.003-07:00

Maybe not... if you don't live in the social networking/new media world, like I do.

I noticed the glut of "new media experts" on twitter. Nearly all of my nearly 600 following/followers has some connection with social media/new media/etc. And everyone is an expert or offering workshops or chances to maximize my networking ability. Cool. I want to do that. I want to learn how to use Facebook and Twitter and Yelp and blogs to it's highest capacity to do my job and promote my company...

So I go to workshops... I've been to quite a few by different people and organizations. (None from my tweeter friends. I think they have a bit more credibility in it but still...) And my conclusion? I could have led everyone of those workshops.

Nothing groundbreaking was revealed to anyone who knows how to use Facebook or write a blog. Now, I can understand that those introductory levels are important and without fail, 80% of the people at those workshops are Facebook virgins who aren't quite sure what will happen if you "poke" someone but come on! Can't there be an advanced level of these workshops... or are we all stuck at this knowledge level and no one knows much more that I do about how to use these tools to get donations or put Butts in Seats (BIS, yes, it's a real term) or drive awareness?

Frankly, I am starting to realize that, for the first time in my life, I am actually part of the pioneering generation for this type of marketing/promotion. None of us know what the world will look like next year or the year after or the year when the last newspaper folds. Right now, one of the biggest pulls for our show attendance is physical newspaper ads and articles. What will replace that when the Rocky Mountain News and Denver Post go out of business? Trying to stay ahead of the curve isn't easy.

And frankly, I don't despise the people who say they are social media experts and put on basic workshops on how to set up a myspace account but I wish everyone would just be honest and say, "We just aren't positive. We aren't sure what the BEST way is to maximize traffic to your site or sell tickets but here are a number of options that have worked in the past." We don't have enough historical data to give absolutes here.

The biggest lesson I want people who fall into that 80% who don't know how to write a blog or create a Facebook fan page to learn is that they need to hire a young person to help them. My boss and I have discussed this often. She feels that without me at this office, BNC wouldn't be where it is today. Where is BNC? At the forefront of current technology, on all the major what-to-do sites in Denver, all over Google. The best compliment I get is when people say to me, "I see you guys EVERYWHERE," because that is the key. You must have a person on staff who has the time and know how to put your company all over the internet.

Whew! That was my soapbox today. I guess I just wish people could say, "I don't know but we can all find out," instead of assuming an answer.

P.S. I hope this doesn't sound snarky. I know some really wonderful PR/Marketing new media experts who are really good at what they do. It's just the proliferation of them that makes me think...

Broomfield Chamber Business After Hours and what I learned

2009-02-19T20:22:00.003-07:00

It is HARD to get food donated in a recession but people are really nice and want to help.
Restaurants change GMs like I change purses... In fact, one time, I called on a monday and got one guy and called the next day and got a new GM... grrreat!
Beer is harder to get donated in a recession! (Come on people, keep drinking, the microbrews need your support!)
Eldorado Water, Red Robin at Flatirons, California Pizza Kitchen at Flatirons mall, El Jimador on 84th and Huron, Old Chicago's in Broomfield, and WideFo.us are incredibly generous companies and you REALLY should support them and give them your business.
Raspberry EFFEN vodka is DAMN good in Red Robin's Freckled Lemonades!
No matter how many times you plan an event, you always forget something.
A full 15.5 gallon keg weighs approx 136 lbs and serves 161 12oz cups. I'm not kidding.
The Container Store is a really cool company and they really care about the communities they go into.
I'm really good at event planning.
Try the sun-dried tomato and broccoli fussili at California Pizza Kitchen... and you thought their pizza's were good... WOW! (Get chicken on it... yum!)

Okay, now I have to go clean up and I think I might sleep in tomorrow. That's what you get to do after a successful event, right? :-)

Ben and Jerry's

2009-02-18T15:20:00.001-07:00

Okay, I don't want to post a ton of "funny things you get on email" here but this one is just too cool. I don't know if it actually happened but these names are hilarious! Some of these are really creative!

Ben & Jerry created "Yes Pecan!" ice cream flavor for Obama.

For George W. they asked for suggestions from the public.

Here are some of their favorite responses:
- Grape Depression
- The Housing Crunch
- Abu Grape
- Cluster Fudge
- Nut'n Accomplished
- Good Riddance You Lousy Motherfucker... Swirl
- Iraqi Road
- Chock 'n Awe
- WireTapioca
- Impeach Cobbler
- Guantanmallow
- imPeachmint
- Heck of a Job, Brownie!
- Neocon Politan
- Rocky Road to Fascism
- The Reese's-cession
- Cookie D'oh!
- Nougalar Proliferation
- Death by Chocolate... and Torture
- Freedom Vanilla Ice Cream
- Chocolate Chip On My Shoulder
- Credit Crunch- Mission Pecanplished
- Country Pumpkin
- Chunky Monkey in Chief
- WMDelicious
- Chocolate Chimp
- Bloody Sundae
- Caramel Preemptive Stripe
- I broke the law and am responsible for the deaths of thousands...with nuts

Sherlock Holmes ala Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce

2009-02-18T14:23:00.005-07:00

Okay, so a stated previously, I LOVE Sherlock Holmes. My dad even got an autographed copy of the complete works... which I thought was totally cool until I realized two things -

A. #1. It was signed, "To Talia.... Sincerely, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle" and he has been dead for oh, I don't know... 50 years?

B. #2. It was totally my dad's handwriting.

But that did make it kinda more cool, that my dad would do that for me.

Anywho, so I was watching a little late night TV the other night and two things happened (and they say things come in threes...) -

A. #1. I saw a listing for the old (1980's) Jeremy Brett version of the Sherlock Holmes tv series AND

B. #2. My curiosity peaked, I went searching on Comcast for more and found that Encore was showing the old, OLD (1940's) Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce version of the Sherlock Holmes tv/movie series that they were making while doing the radio show during WWII!!!!

I have never seen #2 and got super excited... until I realized I don't get Encore. So I went searching... I found the entire set on Amazon.com! Both of them! The 1980's and 1940's versions! All episodes! ON DVD!!!!

Of course I bought them immediately (early birthday present to me)!

So here's the deal. Brett was brilliant as Holmes but Rathbone created the role... and yet, I have never seen his face! (okay, except on wikipedia) The earlier episodes that Rathbone did were taken out of Doyle's context and put during WWII so Holmes and Watson were fighting the Nazis. When the war was over, they went back to dramatizations of stories like Doyle's (they did that a lot, write new episodes based on Doyle's characters and style).

So, needless to say, I am anxious to get my DVDs and have a Sherlock Holmes marathon! :-)

P.S. The top is Jeremy Brett and the bottom is (obviously) Basil Rathbone.

--Talia

It's my first time, be gentle...

2009-02-18T14:06:00.005-07:00

Okay so here's the deal. I blog for work, I tweet for work, I tweet for me, I facebook, I myspace, I link-in... but I have never blogged personally.

I thought it would be an interesting experiment to try to blog. I do well with the 140 characters of Twitter... how will I do with a full blog?

We will see. I have promised myself I won't resort to blogs full of quotes (okay, sometimes... I love quotes) or links or "I am brushing my teeth."

So here's some back story and expectations.

I am a 27 (nearly 28) year old Public Relations professional in Denver. I work in the non-profit arts sector and love my work. [So look for blogs about PR, social media, marketing, networking, arts, dance, theatre, film... etc.]

I am in grad school, working on my masters in PR & Marketing. [More PR & marketing stuff, plus school trials and tribs.]

My father is a rabbi (seriously, follow his blog - Rocky Mountain Hai. It rocks.) and so I do a lot of work in the Jewish community. [Yes folks, that means Judaism, Jewish holidays, Israel, and Israeli politics, etc.]

I volunteer for Goodwill in Denver and my sorority, Gamma Phi Beta. [You'll hear about that I am sure. GPhi, volunteering, working with needy kids.]

I love yoga and am a bit of an addict. [Yup, you will hear when I master hurdler and if I fall out of my flying crow. Did I mention that birds of paradise is one of my favs? I'll get ya a picture.]

Lastly, I think, I am obsessed with a few things.
A. Angela Lansbury is my hero (hence Talia, She Wrote).
B. Fred Astaire, Ginger Rodgers, Gene Kelly... most films made between 1930 and 1955.
C. Agatha Christie and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle (that means Hercule Poirot and Sherlock Holmes, people)
D. Old radio shows. I love the old commercials... Petri Wine, Clipper Craft Clothing...
E. Wait, Wait Don't Tell Me (on NPR)
[All of the above, free game for blogs.]

Okay, one more thing... I am going to try to not delve too deeply into my personal like (aka dating) because, well, it's personal and frankly, I know some people who would love to use that against me. But I have no doubt a few details will slip in. :-)

Alright, enough level setting. Nice comments appreciated.

I hope this blog works out. It's fun already!

-- Talia Davis